


Life's A Musical, Baby

by oldrazzle



Category: Glee
Genre: Angst, Coming of Age, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, Friendship, Humor, Jealousy, Mutual Pining, Romance, quinntana
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:20:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 62,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27195034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oldrazzle/pseuds/oldrazzle
Summary: Santana is knocked out after an altercation with Lauren Zizes, only it wasn't Lauren who knocked her out. Quinntana fic, featuring the very best and worst of teenage (and early adult) life. Sex, drugs and coming of age: a killer combo. (Crosspost from FF.)
Relationships: Quinn Fabray/Santana Lopez
Comments: 2
Kudos: 63





	1. Ass Meet Floor

Arriving in the McKinley parking lot a good 15 minutes after school had started, Santana, despite appearances, was ready to take on the menace to her threadbare heterosexuality. Lauren Zizes.

She hadn't been able to sleep all night knowing that Puck was fawning after Zizes when her fine ass was right here. It was also kind of stressful knowing that the best cover she had when it came to her occasional (okay, frequent) gay faux pas in the presence of Brittany and the odd very hot teammate was losing interest.

Bonus points for him being easy to please and enough of an annoyance to distract her from thought of Brittany and her flavour of the week. (She supposed wheels were in lately.)

Having a mere two hours sleep at most, Santana had adopted a more dishevelled look that fine morning. Pulling at the hem of her younger sister's t-shirt (judging by the horrendous print and healthy breeze on her midriff) she fixed her bag over her shoulder and stormed the front doors with one thing in mind: _Take that bitch down._

Laces being tied were not a requirement for this, nor were matching socks, apparently.

…

Quinn, on the other hand, had started her day with the utmost preparedness, with her ponytail tight and her uniform perfectly pressed, she was determined to have a good day.

Having gotten back onto the Cheerios was a great relief in many ways, being the captain of the team and head of the school's hierarchy helped her to navigate McKinley and manipulate faculty easier than ever. She tried to ignore the occasional pang of guilt she felt as she recalled all the relationships she let fall to the wayside on her trail to the top.

One relationship in particular played on her mind more often than the others. But now was not the time to ponder on that.

It was worth it. Or so she told herself.

She walked with purpose. To any onlooker that purpose had to have been important, right? Too right, Quinn realised as that walk came to a slow stroll, her eyes shifted down the corridors as she felt the telltale sign of a not so good day after all.

She had just gotten her period. Perfect.

With that her purpose returned. She spun on her heel and headed quickly to the nearest restroom.

...

Santana was in luck. Lauren was already waiting for her when she arrived.

After reading the tweet Santana had posted at 4:53 am that morning saying, "poaching white rhinos isnt a crime taking my manz is" Lauren had had an inkling Santana would have been looking for her and decided to take control of the situation before the day had started.

To Santana's disappointment she only had only gotten 3 likes.

"Santana! What a joy to see you this morning." Like butter wouldn't melt Lauren spoke in a mockingly sweet lilt. "What time do you call this? I've been waiting for you."

Stopping short, a look of surprise quickly flashed over Santana's features before she fixed them into a dazzling smile. "Lauren, a pleasure as always." Two could play at this game.

"Looking sharp this morning, Lopez."

"Oh this little thing?" Santana dropped her bag to the floor and held her t-shirt out in front of her as she pretended to admire it. "I'll have to lend it to you some time." That smile slipped into a smirk as she looked back up at Lauren.

"Hm, sure. So you think Puck's your 'manz' now? Didn't realise he was interested, y'know with all the time he's been spending on getting my attention."

"He'll wise up once he realises bestiality is illegal."

"Ouch. Spend all night thinking of that?"

_Kind of._

"No!" Santana ran her hands through her hair in frustration. She was sick of this game. She wasn't in the mood, time to cut to the chase. "You need to back of my mans, fors I ends you."

"Are you having a stroke?" Lauren snorted and squared up to Santana looking down her glasses at her with disdain. "Make me, bitch."

Today was not going to be the day Santana had to put her "straightness" to rest. She had to keep this, to have one thing to stay the way it was. Brittany had ditched her and Quinn had fucked her over, Puck's beard status was at Defcon 1. She was going to have to smack this bitch silly.

The thing was though, her bearings weren't all there and it wasn't like she'd ever fought with somebody stronger or more skilled than her 14 year old sister (despite her many claims otherwise), so when she clocked Lauren on the nose instead of the slap she'd pictured her eyes widened and she said prayers, cuz she bout to get fucked up.

"Oh fuck."

Lauren, to her credit, took it in stride as she proceeded to take her glasses off in an eerily calm manner. When she'd safely tucked them away she grabbed Santana by the scruff of her neck before the other girl had the chance to stop her, once secure in Lauren's grip she had little chance of escaping now.

Sue's Human Cannon, who?

…Would have been the question on Santana's mind if she was not being launched into the lockers on the far wall. The sound of a body hitting metal reverberated down the empty hallway, reminding Santana that she was alone in this mess.

"What now? Huh?" Lauren wasn't on the wrestling team for a joke.

Santana stood up to save face, but she knew a losing game when she saw one. She was a Cheerio after all.

So she did the gracious thing.

_Fuck it._

She ran at Zizes only to be knocked on her ass again.

_Okay, time to rally Lopez. Don't be a little bitch._

Third time's the charm, or so they say.

Regaining her footing once more Santana took a moment to centre herself. She could do this, David versus Goliath and all that. Taking a deep breath she locked eyes with Lauren who was close to laughing at her. That was enough to launch her into a grappling match with Lauren… for all of five seconds. She was pinned and squirming like a worm before she could blink.

"Ugh, get off me." Santana dramatically gasped out. "I can't breathe!"

Laughing to herself Lauren started to lean back on to her knees to give Santana some space. "Okay, but only if you promise to drop this shit. It's not cute."

God, she must be tired, because she felt tears burning behind her eyes, "Fine. Ruin my life, who gives a shit?"

Lauren wasn't the one to find any sympathy from, she knew this, so it surprised her when Lauren held out a hand when she had gotten up.

"You're messed up, you know that?"

Rolling her eyes, but sparing a defeated smile all the same Santana finally nodded in agreement, "I know. I know."

"Now get out of here before I change my mind and beat your ass for real." Lauren gave Santana a smirk that told her she was messing with her. She felt a sudden gratefulness towards Lauren, a feeling she hadn't had toward many lately.

"You're alright, I suppose. He could do worse." _You could do better._ With that Santana grabbed her bag and hurried down the hallway, half in embarrassment and half in the effort to not find out if Lauren was being serious.

In her sense of urgency she wasn't paying attention to what was ahead of her and that meant a painful collision with one Quinn Fabray who was in a rush of her own.

Santana bounced backward, twisting with all the grace of a drunken ballerina as she fell into the lockers. Smacking her head against the corner of one of them she felt a sudden searing pain and immediate throbbing sensation that brought tears to her eyes.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck._

Lying on the floor she sucked in a breath to manage the pain. She was sure she'd spent 50% of her day down here by now.

Wait a minute, why was she feeling so woozy? She tried to sit up, but felt too sick. Her stomach churned and she pulled a face that suggested she was about to up-chuck, much to Quinn's disgust.

But no, she was good as long as she lay as still as she could. This was worse than a hangover. You ever get the feeling that your day is going to be a bad one?

Santana kept her eyes closed and felt the lull of unconsciousness drag her down. Guess that much needed sleep was coming sooner than expected, because it was lights out.

Lauren stood in shock and hurried to put her glasses back on having witnessed this dumb bitch go and finish the job for herself. Quinn shared her expression and leapt into action when she saw that Santana wasn't getting back up. She had been a cheerleader for quite a while now and she knew the signs of concussion. Unconsciousness and nausea were definitely not good signs.

"I think she's bleeding. Can you help me take her to the nurse's office?" Quinn couldn't control the desperate tone to her voice. Lauren looked at the girl strangely, cheerleaders in this school were weird. In Lauren's opinion, Cheerios were a special breed of insane. She had even witnessed a Cherrio in a neck brace be a flyer before. Like what the fuck? And now here was Quinn going soft on the girl she had no issue with throwing under the bus not so long ago.

The groan from the dead weight on the floor brought her back to the situation.

"Yeah. Let's go." Lauren lifted a limp Santana as Quinn came to her other side to help to hold her up as they both carried her to the world's most questionable nurse. School budgets for you.

"My face, my beautiful face," Quinn breathed a sigh of relief at the sound of a whimpering Santana. Turning to look at her she took in her bedraggled appearance and let a small smile reach her lips seeing Santana, eyes still closed, pull a face.

"It'll stick like that y'know." Quinn murmured in amusement.

"Shh, please." Santana hushed back as she leaned her head nearer to Quinn's. Lauren caught Quinn's eye over Santana's head and rolled her eyes, making it harder not to laugh at the girl they were carrying.

Still quite aware that she needed to go to the restroom, Quinn set a brisk pace and decided she'd have to check-in with her later, leaving Santana to wallow in despair over her potentially compromised beauty.

...

Brittany had been sitting in the nurse's office watching Santana acting weird for at least ten minutes before she had to say something.

"San?"

"Yes, Britt?" Santana giggled like she had said the funniest little joke ever.

"Are you okay? Lauren told me you hit your head pretty hard." Brittany looked on with concern. Santana had been so moody lately so she was hoping she wouldn't get the cold shoulder. Since their "break-up", Santana had been snapping at her and the rest of the club more so than usual, the playful jibes had become sharper and less friendly and the club had noticed. Lauren had texted her soon after she'd brought Santana to the office, when she arrived she noticed that Quinn was leaving, just missing her.

Not that Brittany minded.

"Me? When you're with me, you bet." Santana said genuinely, smiling softly as she looked Brittany in the eye before leaning back onto the bed and closing her eyes briefly with a grimace. Lolling her head to the side to look back at Brittany, Santana scrunched her nose. "Hurts."

Brittany gave a sympathetic look. "Well, what was with you wanting to fight Lauren this morning? She told me when I got here."

"Zizes isn't so bad after all. I think I could like the girl."

When Santana said ridiculous things like that she normally had a mischievous look about her that meant she was thinking the opposite. Brittany had known Santana long enough to know the routine, but this time was different. She seemed serious. Did Santana actually… mean it? Brittany pursed her lips in thought as she held contact with brown eyes that showed no sign of naughty (not her favourite kind, anyway) thoughts.

"San, why'd you try to hurt Lauren?" Brittany reached for her best friend's hand, hoping to connect them more so than they had been these past couple of months. Things had been tense between them and they hadn't binged Sweet Valley High together in so long and the new season of The Real Housewives of New York was so good. Luann was being more pretentious than ever. Santana would've lapped it up with her.

She thought back to when she decided to put her feelings first, she just couldn't sleep with Santana without dating her properly anymore. She didn't like pretending that the kisses they shared at parties were for show and she didn't like the way her heart felt like it was going to burst out of her chest every time Santana vied for some dumb boys affection to hide her true self. It hurt, sure, but it had to be done for her sanity. And now she had that dating kind of relationship with Artie. He was sweet to her and she thought she just might love him, but she loved Santana too. They were friends first, that's what she had to remind herself every time Santana had tried to shut her out.

"I just had a lapse in judgement. Didn't get my eight hours." Santana was avoiding the question, but she didn't understand why. "I don't want to talk about it."

"S, have you been taking that 'vitamin D' Mrs Schuester gave us a while back again? I don't think it's good for you. Tubbs had some too and he was a chimney for three full days. I had to confiscate his cigars."

"Britt, don't worry. I feel okay. I don't know what came over me." She gave Brittany a reassuring squeeze to her hand, her heart fluttering at the closeness they were sharing, but dropping at the thought it was to be short-lived.

"Okay, S. But I'm watching you."

Santana gave a shy smile in response.

"Hey, is that Lucia's?" Brittany said pointing at her top.

…

"Lopez! Heard my lady introduced you to the floor this morning." Puck hollered as soon as she entered the choir room later that day.

"You wish, Puckerman." Santana searched Lauren out and gave her a nod as she went to take her seat at the back of the room. Quinn came to sit next to her but didn't say anything for a while. Santana thought she had escaped any interrogation until Quinn asked if she was okay to which Santana told her to watch where she was going in future.

Quinn had scoffed at her, but she should have known better than to talk to her in any other tone than commanding. Even being at the bottom of the pyramid demanded perfection, or so she'd been told.

So be it, Quinn could be pissed off at her. Sure, she appreciated her carrying her to the nurse's, but that didn't mean they were friends. At least not any more.

…

When Santana had entered the choir room Quinn's attention was peaked, she noticed Santana had since put on a sweatshirt that she didn't recognise as hers. The doting look from Brittany gave her a hint though. She was reassured however when Santana chose to sit by herself near the back, so perhaps things were not back on with those two. Quinn quickly moved away from leaning on the piano, deciding whatever Mercedes and Kurt were talking about didn't really need her input and sat herself next to her old friend.

She felt compelled to make sure Santana was feeling alright, she didn't even want to pretend that the reason she wanted to know was for the sake of the pyramid's structural integrity. It was quite the hit to the head and she felt lucky she had escaped unscathed.

When Santana quickly shut her down, she couldn't be surprised, but at least Santana seemed back to herself. Y'know, a bitch.

Thinking better of it Quinn moved a few seats over deciding a bit of space was probably better, she couldn't exactly claim to have the tamest of tempers herself, though by the time Glee had come to a close everything had gone without incident. Santana hadn't chimed in with any snide remarks, she even smiled a little when Sam tried to impress Mercedes with some new and tragic dance moves. When Quinn caught it she had to do a double-take. Santana smiling around here had been few and far between since the whole "Bartie" situation had gone down.

Quinn found herself thinking about Santana's smile on her way home that afternoon.

...

When Santana got home her brat of a sister was in her room, as per usual, rooting through her make-up and tossing items she didn't need onto her dresser. Their mom wouldn't be home until late and it had always been them two in the end.

Two peas in a bitch pod.

Santana pulled Brittany's sweatshirt over her head and threw it on her bed, already missing the smell of it. How sad, she thought. Brittany had moved on so she'd just have to do the same.

"Hey," Lucia looked up and grinned at her big sister, "don't you have your own clothes?" Nodding down at her sister wearing her top she let out a small chuckle.

"What can I say? I'm a fashion icon. A trendsetter some say." She threw her pillow at Lucia's head, successfully distracting her from making her room a mess. Okay… an even bigger mess.

"Hey! No fair, I wasn't looking you snake," she ran at her sister and tackled her to the bed hissing at her and roughly mussing her hair, "how'd you like that?"

Squeaking in surprise from the impact Santana did her best to fight back, laughing between gasping breaths as she pinched at her sister's side to get her to stop. She flipped her hair out of her face and caught her breath. Lucia was the best brat she's ever known.

"I heard you last night y'know. Your sleep still shit?" Lucia pulled at her own top on her sister.

"Yeah." She sighed.

"Is it Puck?" Lucia wasn't dumb. She knew her sister was a raging lesbian, but she also knew that her sister was a stubborn asshole too.

"I guess. I'm over that now though." Santana glanced to the side of her sister's head at her poster of the US women's soccer team that Brittany gave her when she was trying to encourage her to 'embrace her unicorn'. "I don't think it matters anymore."

"Oh? How come? Hit your head and finally come to your senses?" Lucia let out a little laugh at that but was taken aback when Santana laughed along with her. Their laughter was contagious, both of them encouraging each other until Lucia stopped, realising she didn't know what was so funny. "Wh-what?"

"It's just… it's definitely something like that. Not quite the right order though." She looked to her baby sister shaking her head as though that would explain things. "I don't know."

Santana flopped backward, landing on Brittany's sweatshirt and smiled. She pulled it from under herself and folded it up neatly, tucking it into her bedside table. Out of sight, out of mind. And with that she gave a resolute nod to herself, catching her sister giving her side-eye and a weird smile before she slipped out of her room.

Shaking her head she closed her eyes and let the day wash over her. She supposed it wasn't such a bad day after all. Time to catch that shut-eye that she'd been waiting for all damn day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N : This is the first fic I'd ever written, published way back at the end of September 2019 over on FF. I say this in hopes you'll please forgive the writing-style to begin with, I'd like to think I've improved since then and gotten a lil more into my writing groove. I have a fair few chapters for it already so gonna be posting them here (and when I update too). :)


	2. Friends?

Quinn was being a real pain in her ass lately. However which way Quinn had interpreted Santana's brush off must have been some mental gymnastics because since then Quinn had been making a conscious effort to be nicer to Santana. Santana wouldn't admit it outright, but her edges were certainly softening when it came to her old best friend.

Santana thought back to their childhood when they'd knock on doors in their neighbourhood and run away only to be caught every time because the driveways were too long, or when they'd tell all the other kids that they had evil twins and would help each other transform with a carefully placed scrunchie here and a smoky eye there.

"Sandbags! Head up!" Santana stiffened her shaking arms and put on her best smile as she held the strain of the body above hers. "Pathetic. You're all pathetic." Sue's words bit harder than a hungry dog with rabies. Fuck her, she thought as she continued to smile.

They'd been stupidly close until they went up to high school. Then their competitiveness had gotten the better of them and every interaction was tense. Santana distanced herself and spent most of her time with Brittany and Quinn occupied her time with anyone but. Sure, they were dubbed the Unholy Trinity and put on a solid front for the most part, but they didn't speak all that much outside of school anymore.

Quinn was standing alongside Sue, hands on hips, eyes scrutinizing every part of the pyramid. She looked intimidating as hell. She was intimidating as hell. Her gaze fell to her own and her smile felt a little less forced for it.

...

After seeing Santana get hurt Quinn had been reminded that this was somebody she used to care for, somebody who she used to call 'best friend'. It was a harsh reminder that she'd willingly let their friendship fail to maintain an image she felt like she didn't fit into anymore.

Since that day, Quinn had tried to reconnect with Santana.

Thankfully, it seemed to have been paying off - Santana had lost some of her sting when it came to her. But other than the odd conversation in the cafeteria or on the field, she hadn't had a chance to steal all of Santana's focus. Not when every movement was being monitored by Brittany. If Quinn wanted to be able to have an honest conversation with the girl who used to know her better than anybody else she was going to have to get her alone.

"Hey, S, can you come here a sec?" Quinn panted as training came to a close. She had to stop herself from screaming when she saw Brittany turn her head in their direction to wait for a response.

"Oh, sure." She took a long swig from her water and tossed it to the ground as she strolled over to Quinn, stretching out her muscles as she did.

"I was just wondering if you'd meet me in the choir room before Glee," Brittany was moving slowly over to them so Quinn lowered her voice, "so that we can talk."

"Aye aye, Cap," the other girl leaned in to whisper with mirth in her eyes. With a wink and a tap to her own nose, she leaned back and gave Brittany a startled smile. Santana hadn't realised she had gotten so close. Neither had Quinn who took a step back.

Brittany returned the smile, but Quinn noticed it seemed a little strained.

...

Where once Brittany could just tell Santana what was on her mind, she wasn't so confident in where they stood anymore. She was with Artie now and she wouldn't be as bothered if Santana was still being cold, but here she was, treating her like the friends they'd always been. It warmed her heart, but also put her feelings back into limbo.

She watched as the pair made their way back up the field laughing together about something she couldn't make out. It stirred something in the pit of her stomach.

Quinn being all coy wasn't helping her confusion either. If she was being honest she never liked Quinn. Before she transferred to McKinley she knew that Quinn and Santana had been close, but all she'd seen since being with them was them fighting and being less than friendly. Whatever Quinn needed Santana for she wasn't going to like it.

...

Quinn played with the keys of the choir room's piano whilst she waited. She had skipped out of the last ten minutes of her history class to make sure she was here before everybody else. Being pretty and under Sue's regime had its perks. Slipping out unquestioned was easy enough.

She'd worried over the thought of this conversation since speaking to Santana last. Even though they'd been at odds more so than not for a while, she had missed having that connection they shared. No matter who she befriended, she just couldn't find anyone like Santana. Mercedes came close and Quinn was forever indebted to her for her kindness and warmth when she had nowhere to go when pregnant with Beth, but they didn't have the history like she and Santana had.

"Q," with that there she was in the doorway. "You come here often?" She had a cheeky gleam in her eyes that had Quinn turning a little red, much to her mortification.

"Took your time, didn't you? I think I've aged about thirty years just sitting here waiting for you." She crossed her arms in mock exasperation.

"Surely that's a good thing. Now your age will match your dress sense." That twinkle was still in her eye and Quinn wanted it to stay.

"Hardy har har, you're so clever. Come," she patted the piano bench she was sitting on, "take a seat."

Santana took her cue and shuffled in very slowly.

"Quicker," the blonde laughed and Santana was now barely moving at all, "oh my god, you're the bane of my existence." Quinn got up and tried to drag Santana over laughing all the while. Santana stood her ground, she was determined not to budge. Before they knew it they were falling into each other and acting like utter idiots, gasping for breath between fits of giggles.

"Okay, okay, I give!" Santana raised her hands in a placating motion as they stood smiling with goofy grins at each other, the whole exchange bringing back memories of how they used to be together. She'd missed this. They both missed this. "What did you need to," she dramatically leant in and whispered, "talk about?"

Quinn rolled her eyes and shoved at her, the other girl feigned it hurting and rubbed at her arm, "I wouldn't be surprised if that did actually hurt. Seems like you can't handle anything too rough," she tapped to a spot on her own hairline and nodded to Santana, "exhibit number one."

Santana felt for the bump she knew was there and shrugged. "Depends on what kind of rough I guess."

Blushing slightly Quinn cleared her throat, "I just wanted to tell you something, something I haven't had the balls to do until recently actually."

"Shoot, Q."

"I don't know what it is, but-"

"Hey guys! What are you doing here so early? I totally thought we'd be the first ones here today." Brittany came bounding into the room pushing Artie a little too quickly for his liking.

"I guess not." Quinn deadpanned.

Santana frowned and mouthed 'talk later' to Quinn with a questioning raise of her eyebrow. With a nod, she took her seat and shot a glare toward a certain someone.

_Fucking Brittany._

...

Rachel was spewing off her newest suggestions for the club's possible song choices for whatever competition they were getting themselves into next, but Santana was not listening. She might have been feeling as light as a feather, but her attention span could only take so much. So as Rachel blabbered, her mind wandered. Wandering where you might ask? Well take Quinn's little chat earlier for instance. What did she want?

Ever since she'd bashed her head people had been treating her differently, but Quinn had been treating her familiarly if that made sense. Maybe the fact that she wasn't three seconds from committing homicide on a daily basis helped with the shift in attitude towards her, but maybe the new slushy flavour was really doing it for people, she wasn't sure.

But with Quinn, they'd been in this place before, where they could talk and not want to slap each other. It had been a long time coming. In fairness before the floor incident, she hadn't exactly been open to reconciliation, she had been too consumed by worry about what her attraction to girls meant, how she was going to keep that moron Puck, and how she was going to cope with Brittany being happy with somebody else. It was just a lot to keep on top of and it had stressed her the fuck out. Royally so. Stress equalled other people getting more shit, she needed a release somehow and wreaking havoc had helped somewhat.

But here she was now, not ripping Rachel's head off and that was great. She had so much more energy to masturbate now. Who knew being at a hundred all day every day took it out of her so much.

She snapped her unfocused gaze to Quinn to catch her looking at her. Instead of looking away, it seemed Quinn was in a world of her own, not fully realising Santana was looking her way. She was biting down on her lip, head resting in her hand a glazed look in her eye. Santana had been feeling a little goofy all day so why stop now? Pulling a few faces at Quinn wouldn't hurt. At first, she crossed her eyes, but when that started to hurt she tried to pull to imitate the gassy infant look she'd seen on Finn's face many a time.

If anyone else caught her she accepted that she would have to leave the state.

She hadn't realised Quinn had noticed until she heard giggling come from her direction. Everyone, including Rachel, stopped to look to a red-faced Quinn who stared resolutely ahead as though she'd not made a peep.

Santana felt rather proud of herself if she was being frank.

Not one to be easily deterred, Rachel continued - slight interruption aside. Her dedication to sharing her thoughts on song choices was admirable. All aboard the secondary-song-choice-list train. Choo choo!

...

God, that was three times within the space of half an hour Santana had her blushing like a nun in a sex store. She needed to get a hold of herself.

Quinn had totally zoned out staring at Santana, how they were earlier played on her mind and made her feel almost giddy. It was a foreign feeling and she was liking it despite the confusion that it was bringing. Having Santana back in a friend capacity was tangible now and she couldn't stop the smile coming to her face. Chancing a look back at Santana she caught her smirking but facing forward. For that she was thankful.

...

Brittany didn't think anything of Quinn's interruption when it happened, but when Glee had finished and everybody was getting ready to go she waited for Artie to finish talking to Tina about some new artist he was listening to (totally boring, but she was being a good girlfriend) she saw Quinn eyeing Santana. And it was not in the usual revenge-on-my-mind kind of way, more so in the bend-over-again-to-pick-up-your-things-please kind of way. She was not impressed. What was going on there?

"You ready, Britt?" Artie's question drew Brittany's distracted glare, he recoiled slightly at having it directed at him. She seemed to come back to herself quickly when she nodded at him with one last look back at Quinn before she pushed him out of the choir room.

...

Lucia had texted her earlier that day claiming to have lost all function of her legs after her track training, so Santana just _had_ to give her a ride home. Oh, and deciding to lie on the hood of her sister's car as she waited seemed like a great idea… until it wasn't.

"You better have a good reason to be on my car!" The tell-tale sound of her sister storming the gravelled parking lot fell on conveniently deaf ears. "Hey!" Santana pulled her shoe off, quickly rousing her attention.

"No fair, why the shoe?"

"Why not the shoe, brat? Get off my car, like right now."

Lucia, now sitting up on the hood noticed Quinn was on her way over, "Quinn! Well, aren't you a sight for sore eyes." She plastered on her sweetest smile and fluttered her eyelashes.

Quinn shaded her eyes as she approached, a small smile gracing her features when she saw Santana standing there looking put out that her baby sister was ignoring her. "Hi, Luc."

"Don't ignore m-"

"You haven't been around in ages Quinn, I'm sure Santa-"

"Right you asked for it," one left shoe of one Lucia Lopez was flung over to the far side of the parking lot, bouncing at least three times before it skidded to a stop. If she wasn't annoyed that her shoe had just been launched she might've been impressed with the throw.

"You bitch! My shoe!" Lucia hobbled off the car in a hurry and began a bambi-legged hop over to where it landed.

"That should keep her busy for a hot minute. What's up, Q?" Santana turned to Quinn with a satisfied smirk as she lightly dusted off the hood of her car.

"Well, I just thought we could finish that talk, but if you're busy I-"

"Did you drive here?" Santana cut in.

"Erm, no. Mercedes brought me here this morning." As though summoned by the mere mention of her name, Mercedes and Sam came out of the school exit laughing about something together. When she saw Quinn she gave a quick wave.

"Great, hop in."

"Oh. Oh, okay." Quinn wiped her hands on her skirt and reached for the rear seat door only for Santana to stop her by lightly slapping her hand away.

"Not a chance. I'd put that cretin in the trunk if I could, but she can go back there."

They both got inside to wait for Lucia to drag her slow ass back to the car, mindlessly joking about how Mr Schue's sweater vest collection had thoroughly gotten out of hand and how mortifying Puck's attempts at wooing Lauren were.

"I don't know what we saw in him." Santana said quietly. She looked to Quinn and hoped she agreed.

"Well I know what I saw."

"Oh yeah?" She swallowed hard.

"Yeah, a warm body when I felt fat and gross," Quinn tried to smile but it came out as more of a grimace, "pathetic, huh?"

"Maybe, but not as pathetic as trying to make yourself like guys when you know you don't," it came out rushed and clipped.

Santana had been feeling lighter lately it was true but as to why was hard to come to terms with.

It felt like her tongue swelled in her mouth and her under-boob sweat could hydrate a desert whenever she thought to say anything out loud. It was only now that she felt she could voice it. Failing so miserably trying to get Zizes to back off Puck really took some of the pressure off. (The mild concussion may have also been a contributing factor.) Beard Avenue was to be closed indefinitely and she was secretly glad.

A beat passed between them in silence.

"San, I-"

A sudden breeze came through the right rear door as Lucia launched herself across the backseat. "God San, you're a dick. My sneaker is all scuffed, I only bought them last week," she looked at the two girls in the front seat. Both of them were looking straight ahead, not breathing by the looks of things. _Read the room, Luc._ "Kyle called me a slut today," she blurted.

To her credit it worked a dream, Santana snapped her head around to look at her little sister. "He what! Does he have a death wish?"

"Probably, I mean if I had his B.O. I would too," she mimicked sticking her finger down her throat and gagging, "what a loser."

"Yeah well he better watch himself," she started the engine and pulled off, "next time just kick him in the balls."

"San!" Quinn laughed out.

"What?" she laughed too, "works every time."

Lucia sat back and listened as they reminisced about the many jocks Santana had kicked in the balls, both busting up at the start of stories they both knew every part to. She lay back knowing her job was a job well done.

...

Turns out Lucia had plans of her own with Quinn, Santana be damned. Quinn was quickly dragged off before Santana could get a word out, her old friend seemingly too shocked to say anything. _Since when was Quinn such a wet blanket?_ Santana thought before she recalled the past week she'd been living. She had no room to talk if she was honest with herself.

With her declaration to Quinn hanging over her head, she thought better of going after them. This week had been a lot and she needed some space to think. With Quinn only close by she was sure she'd find her own way home if she decided to slip out without seeing Santana again today. She was hoping that would be the case as much as she didn't.

_God, Quinn had better keep her mouth shut._

Feeling herself flush and heat up over the hypothetical outing of the century, she slipped into her bedroom and locked the door quickly. Jumping prone onto her bed face first she let the cool sheets calm her down a little. Her heart hammered in her chest, overwhelmed with all the same emotions that had plagued her before confronting Zizes. Bottling it all up _really_ worked out for her too. She just didn't know how to move forward. And now somebody other than Brittany knew and her chest tightened at the thought of losing any more control.

"San," a soft knock at her bedroom door drew her out of her spiralling thoughts, "it's Quinn. Can I come in?"

"Ye-," Santana's throat was tight and her voice came out weak before she cleared it, "yeah, come in, Q."

The door rattled for a second before it stopped and rattled again.

"Erm, San. It'd help if the door was unlocked."

 _Duh. What's wrong with me?_ Santana rolled her eyes inwardly. "Shit, yeah," she shimmied off of her bed and was about to swing open the door before she decided to just open it just a crack, "what's the password?"

Quinn did not look impressed. "Don't get cute, we need to talk."

Sighing, Santana fell away from the door to dive back onto her bed where she waited for Quinn to get comfortable. Only that wait was going to be a long one by the looks of things. Quinn stood awkwardly by the dresser and fiddled with her skirt as she took a look around the room.

"That talk?"

"Oh. Yeah. Well I know I tried to grab you earlier and I didn't get the chance to tell you that, I can't believe I'm saying this... I miss you. So much," Santana seemed taken aback. Quinn began pacing as she carried on, "I know this seems so out of the blue. I mean I got you demoted to the bottom of the pyramid for fuck sake, but I mean it, and even then I missed you in some fucked up way." Quinn's voice became taught as tears began brimming her eyes. "You've been so miserable lately and I know, I really do, that it's shit when you feel alone, like nobody has your back. I haven't had yours and you haven't had mine. Then you hit your head and I've been trying," a frustrated breath, "you seem happier now." Quinn looked to Santana then who was sat wide-eyed staring right at her.

"Q, what are you saying?"

"I don't understand you, Santana. Not anymore. I thought it was Brittany and Artie making you miserable," Santana went to interrupt, "no, please. Hear me out," she stopped to gather herself. "She's still not with you, but you're happy again. I just had it all so wrong."

Santana stood up then, coming to stand face to face with Quinn. "Hey," she said softly, "it's okay. I mean I don't understand, but it's okay."

Quinn let out a defeated laugh, "I just thought that you needed her to be happy. You two are like, made for each other or something." Santana grimaced slightly, feeling her heart pang in the knowledge that the ship had sailed on that. "I thought I never had a hope of making you as happy as her, I felt like how we were wasn't good enough. Even back when we were close, where we fought she made you smile. She turned you into a fucking puppy." Quinn rolled her eyes, whether at herself or at Santana she wasn't sure.

"Okay, let's take a breather here, Blondie," Santana placed her hands on Quinn's shoulders, "you and Brittany are completely different people. And you know why we aren't as close. High school is shit and we're both power-hungry bitches who know each other's weaknesses. I suppose with graduation getting closer and with it being our senior year it's time to realise we don't have forever in high school and we shouldn't be so cunty to each other, right? I can get behind that. God, Quinn," Santana dropped her arms, "you did make me happy! When you insult Mr Shue's hair or Finnocence's oafish dancing you make me happy still," Quinn smiled a little at that, "we can work on this if you want to."

"I do." Quinn nodded, "I really do, San."

"And I was not a fucking puppy," with that Santana punched Quinn in the arm.

"Ow, what the hell?"

"Maybe I have a soft spot for hot girls," Santana pointedly looked at Quinn, "no wonder you never saw that side to me."

Quinn let out a scandalised gasp, "You take that back."

"Or what?"

They both looked at each other, Santana's turmoil and confession earlier briefly forgotten as they started to laugh. Settling onto Santana's bed they talked the evening away until Quinn said she needed to go home and that she'd left her mom alone for too long. Santana lay there for a long while after that, smiling at the thought that she had Quinn back. She might not have Brittany in her life the way she wanted, but having Quinn was just as good in a different way.


	3. Friends

The following day Santana swung by Quinn's to pick her up for school. When Quinn heard obnoxious honking outside she could only guess who it would be. With a quick bye to her mom she was out of the door and flinging open the passenger's side door, slipping into the seat and tucking her cheer skirt under her as she did so.

"What a nice surprise to see you here."

"I aim to please." Quinn gave Santana a disbelieving look.

"Since when?"

"Since now, Quinny. Now we gonna go or what?"

"Well, you're driving. So..."

She didn't need to be told twice. Swiftly cranking up the station she was listening to she pulled out of Quinn's drive and set to driving her car like she stole it.

Arriving in the school parking lot white knuckling the handle above the car door, Quinn let out a breath of relief to have made it one piece. She turned to find Santana oblivious to the fact that she had just given all of the drivers in the F1 a run for their money.

"You're crazy."

"What?"

"You. You're crazy. Driving like that."

"Whatever, Q. You love it." Smirking, Santana gave Quinn a challenging look.

" _Yeah, okay_."

"Deny it all you like, I know the truth."

"Hmm. Enough of the yap, let's go."

As they both climbed out of the car and started toward the school building Quinn suddenly realised something about Santana's appearance.

"Why are you not wearing your uniform?"

"God, Sherlock. Sure cracked the case quickly on that one." Santana swept her hair over her shoulder as she readjusted her bag. "I got away with it last time and Sue didn't say anything so fuck it. My wardrobe is too expensive to not flaunt it and anyway, I'll just pretend hitting my head killed a few brain cells and that I forgot or something."

"Good luck with that one, even Brittany wouldn't be that stupid."

"What the fuck, Q?" Santana may not be with Brittany anymore, but that wasn't cool. She caught Quinn's arm before she could go any further, pulling her to a stop.

"I said what I said." Quinn mentally hit herself, she just couldn't shut her mouth sometimes.

"Yeah well maybe you shouldn't have said anything at all." Santana pushed Quinn's arm away and stormed past her into the building.

"Damn it." So much for working on it.

...

Quinn had spent most of the day shying away from Santana after the whole 'stupid' thing. It had made her feel more than sheepish and as luck would have it on the way to her next class she heard a certain blonde's laugh down the hallway. _Great._ Brittany was no better than Santana at this point.

"Hi, Quinn!" Brittany skipped up behind and kept stride with her as she walked.

"Hey, Britt," polite as ever, Quinn smiled.

"I'm having a party this weekend," she passed Quinn a folded up piece of flowery paper. "I hope you can make it. It'll be totally fun."

Quinn opened it up and read Brittany's address. "Britt, I already know where you live."

"I made them for everybody, Quinn." Brittany snatched it back and pointed to the dress code. "Always read the fine print, Quinn. You should know that."

"Black tie?"

"Black tie _only_." With that Brittany gave Quinn a wink and left her in the dust as she swished her Cherrio skirt down the hallway, stopping people as she did handing them the same flowery paper she had given Quinn.

Brittany's parties were notoriously un-PG, you could go wearing more layers than an Arctic explorer and leave in only your underwear. They were an experience. The last time Quinn went to one she ended up in Brittany's pool on a duck inflatable utterly out of her mind in some other girl's shorts and the blouse she'd come in. If she remembered correctly, Brittany had actually managed to wrangle some serious favours by the amount of alcohol and drugs that came flooding through the Pierce family home. She even had her cousin rig the place up with a sound system and lights, all for the promise that they could come and bring their friends. Said cousin being college age and an asshole, but a hot asshole Quinn could at least admit. She wondered if she'd make an appearance at this one.

The bell ringing brought her back to the present, time to get this day over with she guessed.

...

Santana was still peeved at Quinn for what she said, she knew Brittany was sensitive about being called stupid and she also knew that she wouldn't appreciate her talking shit about the girl she loved. Her heart didn't ache as much as it used to, but Brittany was still her friend.

Okay, she may have overreacted by storming off like that, but she was going to let Quinn sweat it if she was going to act like a pussy and avoid her all day.

"Sandbags!"

"Oh brother."

Down the hallway stood Sue Sylvester, eyes steely and fiercely set on Santana.

"My office!"

"God," Santana said under her breath as she turned to follow Sue.

"He can't help you now!"

_What the fuck? Is she a bat?_

As she sat, Sue closed the door behind them and perused the trophies in her office to give Santana a false sense of security. Who would break the silence first?

"Coach I..."

"I was under the impression you were a Cheerio, Boobs McGee?"

Santana gulped. "I am."

"Then why," Sue came to sit on her desk so that she was looking down on Santana, "why, oh why, are you wearing those _pedestrian_ clothes?"

"I.. I hit my head." _This was such a bad idea._

"You hit your head."

"Yep, sure did." _No going back now._

"Outstanding. And did hitting your head rupture your implants making you unable to dress yourself? Is that why you're wearing this monstrosity and not your uniform?"

"No, Coach."

There was an uncomfortable pause as Sue pursed her lips in thought.

"You're lucky I'm feeling merciful today. At practise you're to do twice as many suicides as your teammates, are we clear?"

"Yes, Coach." _Bitch._

"Don't let me catch you not in your uniform again."

Quietly seething and feeling thoroughly chastised Santana nodded and stood to leave only to be stopped just as her hand landed on the door handle.

"Actually, I have a better idea."

At that Santana took a deep breath to stop herself from popping a blood vessel.

"You're going to infiltrate the synchronized swimming team for me. That sea witch, Roz Washington, is gunning for me. I can feel it in my hip replacement."

Santana's eyes almost bugged out of her head.

"You want me to what!"

"It's quite simple. You're going to pretend to be kicked off of the Cheerios and you're going to destroy her pathetic sea monkeys from the inside out."

Santana couldn't help but laugh. "How in the hell am I going to get onto the _synchronized swimming_ team! I've never done that in my life." Incredulous didn't cut it.

"Oh, Sandbags, dear, sweet, Sandbags. You're going to get onto that team or you're no longer on this one. Got it?"

_What in the ever living fuck was this school?_

Perplexed unlike she had ever been before in her life, Santana left Sue's office with another thing to worry about.

Oh God, the chlorine! Actually, did they even put chlorine in that thing? The bacteria! Could she get a yeast infection from the swamp that was McKinley's pool? The thought made her gag.

Luckily it was Friday, so she was not going to think about it again until after Brittany's party. Brittany had told her about it first thing that morning. It was the one thing that was going to get her through the rest of this damn day.

...

In Glee everybody was in high spirits and Brittany was about to make their day ten times better.

"May I have your attention!" Brittany requested the floor as she beamed at the entire club who… were not listening. Rude.

"Hey, shut up." Santana called.

"Oh, sorry Britt." Sam smiled. The rest of the club finally turned their attention to Brittany.

"I used to think you guys were so lame." Kurt, Mercedes and Tina looked blatantly affronted, whilst Quinn bit down a grin. "But now I see you're not so bad. I like you guys, you're weird, but I'm into that. So!" Brittany ran on the spot to create a drum roll effect. "You're all invited to my party this weekend! Come to mine tomorrow, and come early too, we can have a Glee club pre drinks and party before it really gets going." To conclude the invite, she pulled a stack of flower paper out of her bag and tossed it at the club like confetti.

Mr Schue, late as ever, entered and saw the scattered sheets of paper across the floor, he picked one up as he moved to put his bag on the piano.

"Black tie only?"

Brittany's smile widened and her cat-like eyes squinted in barely contained excitement, "Uh-huh."

Puck, Finn, Mike, Quinn and Santana all glanced around at each other knowingly.

"Sounds fancy." Will awkwardly laughed before turning to the board to get the session started.

Despite many stop and starts Will's lesson had been thoroughly derailed, the choir room was abuzz with talk of what people were going to wear and what they were going to bring. Brittany was dancing about the room talking incessantly down the phone to everybody and anybody, calling in all those favours she had managed to collect since the last bash. It may have all seemed last minute to call a party a day before it was happening, but Lima was hard pressed for anything fun to do, so Brittany had no worries when it came to turn-out.

She pranced over to Artie and sat in his lap, pressing a finger to his lips and she finished up her call. "Yes! I can't wait to see you. Lord Tubbington hasn't shut up about you since last time."

Artie couldn't hear who was on the other side of the phone, but heard a laugh and more talking on the other end.

"You'll meet my boyfriend too, he's like half robot. It's so cool." Brittany pecked him on his mouth and he blushed in embarrassment. "Bye, bye, yeah, bye bye bye. Bye. Buh-bye-bye." Brittany turned her eyes onto him and squeezed him into a hug. "You're going to meet my cousin, she's just the best! I wish she was my sister, but my mom doesn't like her so maybe I don't. Gosh, I can't wait."

"Me either, Britt."

...

Quinn had caught the last bit of Brittany's conversation with Artie and rolled her eyes at the thought of Taylor being there tomorrow. She had known it was a likely possibility, but now she knew for sure. The last time they had the pleasure Taylor could have fooled her into thinking she was the real life Regina George. She was beautiful, smart, and funny, but she was also a mean bitch. It all listed like the criteria for an ideal friend for Quinn, but she was convinced Taylor was on another level, there was something in that Kentucky water.

Her musings had caused her to not realise that Santana had moved over.

"I was going to wait for you to come to me first, but I realise now that I have to be the bigger woman here and I resent you for that."

"Santana, I'm sorry about earlier." Quinn tucked her hands under herself, a nervous habit she couldn't shake. "I really didn't mean to start anything."

"Quinn, it's fine. I shouldn't have walked away, but I know I can be nasty when I want to be so I left before I snapped or whatever."

Quinn looked to her shoes, still feeling bad about earlier, but glad that Santana had come to speak to her. A small smile was threatening to break out on her face at the thought of going to Brittany's party together.

"What're you smiling about?" Santana nudged her, matching her smile.

"Just, I was thinking," coming over all shy suddenly Quinn bit her lip and looked to Santana, "do you wanna get ready with me to go to Britt's tomorrow?"

"Well duh! I'm not exactly going to be around Berry's now am I?"

"Cool."

"Cool?" Santana laughed, "cat got your tongue?"

"Shut up. I just didn't know if you'd want to or not."

Santana rolled her eyes playfully at her, "Going soft, Q?"

"Ugh." With that Quinn stood along with the rest of the club, shoving Santana as she got up to join her. Mr Schue had finally given up and had dismissed them, wishing them a fun weekend.

"Hey, hands off the goods." Santana dusted herself off and swiftly linked arms Quinn when she saw that she was ignoring her and walking away. "Wait up."

Quinn tightened her arm around Santana's as she mocked, "Hands off the goods!"

Santana was going to respond in line when she remembered the bizarre plot Sue had cooked up. "You are not going to believe what Sue has told me to do."

That had her attention. Quinn glanced to Santana with a quirk of her eyebrow, intrigued to say the least. "Go on."

"Well! The crazy bitch wants me to join the synchronised swimming team! Swimming!? She's serious-..." Quinn, having had a couple of seconds to process what Santana had just said, felt her lips quiver and before she could help herself she was letting out peals of laughter.

Santana was unsure as to whether she should've been offended or not. Deciding on the latter, she pulled Quinn down the hallway and out into the parking lot, barely holding back hysterics herself. She'd have to dish the details later.


	4. Ain't No Party Like A Brittany Pierce Party

It was the day of the party and Quinn was excited in a girlish schoolgirl kind of way that had her questioning her sanity. She was waiting on Santana to come over and she couldn't keep still. Her room was immaculate as always, but it didn't stop her from wiping down the sides and remaking her bed.

The door to her room suddenly burst open, hitting the wall and making Quinn jump out of her skin.

"Santana!" Quinn yelped. Santana just grinned and tossed her bag of clothes and make-up on the floor before jumping onto Quinn's queen sized bed.

"Miss me?"

"Barely."

Santana ignored her and leant over the side of the bed, pulling her bag up to reach inside and pull out a bottle of vodka. She turned to Quinn and waved it in her direction. "Wanna start pre-pre-drinks?"

Tonight was going to be a long one.

After Quinn had gone and fetched some shot glasses from the kitchen, Santana generously poured shot after shot. About four shots in Quinn felt heat rush to her skin and a flush bloom over her cheeks and chest. She hadn't eaten much in the day and was feeling it a lot quicker than usual.

"Another?" Santana asked. Quinn shook her head before stopping suddenly and holding a hand to her mouth as she closed her eyes and deeply inhaled through her nose.

"Received loud and clear, but one more for luck!" With that Santana knocked back another with a dirty chuckle, almost spluttering the shot as soon as it hit the back of her throat.

The feeling of sickness passed and Quinn took a sip of juice as she watched a very clearly buzzed Santana scrunch her face look up to the ceiling.

"Ah, hits the spot."

"You're such a lush."

"No, I'm just not a pussy."

"Whatever you say." Quinn said teasingly. Checking her phone she saw that they only had an hour or so before they were to set off for the mini-Glee party. Sure, it was actually planned to happen in half an hour, but who turned up on time to these things? She rose from the floor and started pulling her clothes off, shirt first, everything else swiftly following.

Heading straight for her closet she rooted through the countless dresses she had unsure on what to go for. She knew she probably wouldn't be wearing it by the end of the night anyway. _Wanky._ Had Santana really rubbed off on her so quickly? Speaking of, she turned to ask Santana what she thought and caught the other girl staring at her lace-clad ass.

Taking a sharp inhale Santana shot her eyes back up to Quinn's.

They hadn't broached the topic of Santana's sexuality since the day they'd decided to work on their friendship, but if the blush burning Santana's cheeks were any indication she was sure it would have confirmed it was more than a Brittany thing by now.

Now the butterflies Quinn had from catching her? She wasn't too sure about. Everyone likes attention, no?

After going through various different combinations of clothes Quinn, with the very opinionated help of Santana, had decided on some shorts and a white tank. Maybe catching Santana checking her ass out again in the mirror influenced the picking of the shorts, but who knows? It would be hot later, so could be that too.

Santana herself had gone with her old faithful. A short, black, strapless dress that did wonders for showing off her body and didn't she know it. She posed in the mirror for at least ten minutes admiring herself before Quinn told her to move her ass and put her make-up on.

Before they left for Brittany's they had one more shot each (for extra luck, according to Santana).

…

Where Quinn had gone with flats Santana had thought heels were a good idea. That was until she had to walk across Brittany's neighbour's lawns just to get to her door, her poor heels sank into the grass as she clung to Quinn to save her from getting stuck. Judging by the cars that lined the streets already they were later than they thought. The party had started already.

The flashing of lights and rhythmic thudding of bass could be heard from a fair ways down the street, Santana shimmied in excitement and Quinn laughed at her. Those shots had worked their magic and now it was time to get down to serious business. They weren't new to parties, they were old hands by this point. They knew a good time when they saw it.

"You ready?" Quinn said, almost drowned out by the increasingly loud music as they approached the Brittany's front door.

"As I'll ever be," and before she could think too much about it she pecked Quinn on the cheek and whispered close to her ear, "you look beautiful."

Quinn leaned back almost unsure as to how to respond, but she decided pretty quickly as she said just as softly, "So do you."

It shouldn't have made Santana smile as wide as it did. She knew she was beautiful, she'd been told since she was able to comprehend speech, but Quinn saying it? It felt different, it felt like more.

Still smiling as they entered the house, hot, humid air hit them as soon as they stepped over the threshold, the music was blasting and the crowd in the living room let out a roar of cheers.

Quinn took Santana's hand and pulled her through the heaving mass of bodies crowding the hallway into the doorway of the living room. They saw an enthusiastic Brittany swinging her top around as she effortlessly danced to the music.

As if by chance her eyes opened blearily and caught Santana's. She beamed in response.

"Sanny! Quinny!" She leapt through the crowd, barging through the people in front of her without much care for anything in the world. She engulfed them both in a sweaty hug and rested her burning face on top of Santana's head.

"Hey Britt-Britt," the three girls were pressed even further together by people trying to get past them, "shall we go get some drinks?"

"Such a good idea. You're so smart, San." Brittany nodded her head slowly, lolling it around every other nod, very clearly intoxicated.

Still squished, the three of them clung to each other and made it to the kitchen, passing various Glee club members along the way. Rachel and Kurt hung off of each other singing renditions of their favourite Broadway classics between long sips of a very pink drink, Tina and Mike were practically dry humping up against some wall, and Santana's personal favourite, Lauren making out with some guy as a moody Puck glared from afar (bonus for Mercedes whooping at the sight).

The kitchen being significantly cooler than the rest of the house came as a great relief to all of the girls as they broke apart in the less dense room. Brittany, with a heavy hand, snatched a bottle of tequila out of some girl's grasp and tipped it in Santana and Quinn's direction.

"Cheers!" Brittany took a swig of the bottle and handed it off to Quinn.

Quinn eagerly took her up on it and knocked back a fair amount before gagging, making Brittany squeal with laughter. Santana laughed too, but only when she saw Quinn shoot daggers in Brittany's direction.

They talked mindlessly for a while, passing the bottle back and forth, Santana put Quinn to shame as she took a long pull without spitting it everywhere. But as they say, no rest for the wicked and Brittany was definitely that. Apparently already bored with the pair she had wandered off without so much as a goodbye and could be heard laughing in the next room over. Santana wasn't too heartbroken, she wouldn't say no to a little more Quinn quality time. She hopped up onto the kitchen counter and brought Quinn closer to her by the strap of her tank.

The two girls continued to share the bottle for as long as they could before feeling too sick to drink it straight any longer.

"Yuck!" Scrunching her face in disgust Quinn took her last sip and looked to Santana. "Okay, I thi- I think we should go and join the party." The smile was on Santana's face before the first word, she had to admit that Quinn was being pretty cute right now.

"Okay."

Sufficiently on the road to absolutely fucked, Santana had Quinn help her down and pulled her into the heaving crowd once more to dance.

…

Quinn couldn't feel her face and she couldn't find Santana. She tried to find her, but needed to pee too. So here she was, falling asleep on the toilet, head in hand, slipping every now and then until there was a banging on the door.

"Hurry up! I need to go!" A high pitched voice called.

"Ina min.. in a.. min," Quinn slurred. Standing after her third try, Quinn tried to shake herself awake, she splashed cold water onto her face when she managed her way over to the sink. It worked for the most part, she no longer felt on the brink of passing out.

 _Great work, Quinn. We're doing great._ She nodded to her reflection.

She opened the door and there stood the devil incarnate herself. Taylor.

"Quinn?" A wicked smile lit up her pretty face as she stepped into the bathroom with Quinn still in it, locking the door behind her.

"Hey Tay.. hey Taylor." Quinn tried to give her a smile.

"You look good, Quinn." Taylor seemed to be drunk herself, nearly falling on the floor as she tried to sit on the toilet.

Through bleary eyes Quinn looked at herself in the mirror again, she felt like she was doing something. What was she meant to be doing?

Lost in thought she missed the moment when Taylor hip checked her to wash her hands. Quinn nearly fell into the door but caught herself before she did. The other girl laughed as she slid up past her to grab for the door handle.

Cracking the door open she looked back at Quinn with a conspiratorial smile. "Come with me."

Quinn followed her out to what seemed to be the landing. When had she come up here? Then she vaguely remembered the downstairs toilet being loudly occupied.

She could barely hear it under the throbbing bass from downstairs, but she could hear soft music playing from the room they were heading to. Taylor carefully opened the door to a room blanketed in a soft pink glow, there were pink fluffy fairy lights all over Brittany's room. Brittany herself was even there, Artie too.

_How the hell did he get up here?_

They were speaking in hushed tones, giggling every now and then until they saw that Taylor had returned with a guest.

As Quinn got closer she realised Brittany was painting Artie's face with glowing paint, she'd given him glowing glasses and the sight made her laugh. Brittany laughed too and pecked Artie on the mouth.

"Welcome to the secret den." Taylor motioned around the room as she walked off to the side to pull a little baggie out of a drawer in Brittany's dresser. She held it up to Quinn, "Do you want some?"

Taylor slowly approached Quinn and before she knew what she was doing she was nodding yes. Brittany did a little clap followed by a soft cheer. It was then that Quinn looked into Taylor's striking eyes and saw that they were almost black. Her pupils were dilated and there was a slight sheen to her brow. She pulled out a little ball of tissue that held the molly and told Quinn to open wide so she could put it on her tongue, nodding her head to signal to swallow.

"Do you have some water?"

"Oh! Yeah, of course," Taylor grabbed a bottle off the floor and handed it to Quinn.

The four of them sat in Brittany's room for a while, Quinn waiting for it to kick in and the others enjoying themselves by decorating their bodies. Quinn's vision started to vibrate slightly and she felt herself coming up, her face breaking out into a smile as she let her body relax into it.

Clammy hands were on her face and it made her open her eyes (she hadn't realised she'd closed them) to find Brittany looking at her.

"Hey, Quinn."

"Hey, Brittany."

Brittany rested her forehead on Quinn's. "I'm sorry I haven't been a very good friend to you."

"I'm sorry too." And she meant it.

"Can we be friends? But for real friends?"

"I'd love that."

Brittany sat back to squeeze orange fluorescent paint onto her fingertip and slowly ran it down Quinn's cheek.

"Do you love Santana?"

_Santana! Where was Santana?_

Quinn almost jerked in response, but remained steady. That's what she was trying to remember.

"Of course I do, Britt. She's my best friend."

"Okay, Quinn." Brittany kissed her on her nose and sat back on Artie's lap before saying she needed to pee, wheeling a dancing Artie with her.

Quinn wasn't sure if the agreement she had just made with Brittany was the real thing, but she didn't want to think too much about it.

"And then there were two."

Quinn almost fell off of the bed. She had forgotten Taylor was in the room so it startled her to say the least. Taylor muffled her laughter into a pillow and lay down tapping the space next to her.

Despite remembering Taylor as a real cunt, Quinn was feeling quite agreeable and Taylor didn't seem too bad either, she went along with it and lay with her.

"I thought you were a real bitch." Quinn said before she could stop herself.

"I am. And anyway, I thought you were too."

"I am."

They both stared at each other, wide-eyed and hazy in the pink glow of the room. It was Quinn who started to laugh first, Taylor soon joined her until they were short of breath.

_Where's Santana?_

Quinn went to roll off the bed to go and find the answer to that question when Taylor placed a hand on her arm. The contact caused her skin to tingle and get even hotter. They were still for a second, Quinn regarded Taylor curiously.

Warm lips met hers as Taylor unexpectedly kissed her. Even more unexpectedly, Quinn let her.

Quinn began to move her mouth in tandem, accepting the kiss from this girl she barely knew. She didn't particularly care in the moment. It felt too good to care.

It felt even better when Taylor moved the hand that was holding her arm down to her inner thigh where she lightly rubbed the soft skin that was exposed by the ridden-up denim of her shorts.

Feeling bold, Quinn opened her mouth to Taylor and deepened the kiss, encouraging her hand to go further when she lifted her hips. She must have gotten the hint as Taylor pressed her hand directly down in between her legs, only to press harder at the sound of the moan Quinn let out. Grinding up into the other girl's hand, her eyes rolled back into her head.

Quinn grabbed the hair at the base of Taylor's neck to pull her mouth away to breathe as Taylor replaced her hand with her thigh, resuming the friction that had Quinn clawing at her back and grabbing her face to bring her down into another kiss.

Quinn was thoroughly lost in the moment, she felt her high building and she felt her temperature rising. Sweat rolled down her temple and disappeared back into her hairline as she got herself off on Brittany's bitch cousin's thigh.

_Wait. Santana. I lost Santana._

Even though her thoughts were addled she still had Santana on her mind. Her beautiful, fierce and insanely smart best friend who had the best sense of humour and smooth-…

A particularly hard thrust brought her back to the moment, but barely. Still lost in thoughts of warm brown eyes and full kissable lips Quinn's orgasm was just on the horizon. She could taste it.

"Santana…" Quinn moaned out. Almost there.

The friction stopped and Quinn let out a frustrated growl. When she opened her eyes a blonde curtain of hair surrounded her face, sharp blue eyes looking back at her questioningly.

_Oh yeah._

"Santana?"

"Erm," Quinn used her forearm to wipe the sweat from her forehead, "I gotta go."

Awkwardly shifting Taylor off of her she pulled herself up and hurried to leave the room, briefly eyeing the bottle of water on the far side of the bed that she could've done with. Fuck it, she thought, leaving the water and the room.

The air outside of Brittany's room wasn't all that much cooler than the air in the sweatbox she'd just left and Quinn could see from the banister that the party was still in full thwack and didn't look to be dying down any time soon.

She was so thirsty. _Water. Then Santana._

With those things in mind she recalled the bathroom she was in earlier and made her way to the door not hesitating before barrelling through.

The sight of Brittany on her knees and bobbing her head in Artie's lap as he clutched the sink with one hand and her hair with the other scarred her brain. It didn't take a genius to figure out what was going down…

It was definitely Brittany.

Quinn blurted out a sorry that fell on deaf ears as she quickly walked backward out of the bathroom, pulling the door closed as she did.

Falling into the mass of moving sweating bodies Quinn tried to navigate her way through to the kitchen, letting the music flow through her as she glided through, her high peaking and her jaw tense.

_Finally!_

She made it through the throngs into the kitchen and rummaged through the cupboards in search for a cup, she eyed one by the sink and emptied its contents before rinsing it out and filling it to the brim with water. She gulped it back in one. She filled it up again, but only took a sip from this one before diving back into the party-goers.

Then she spotted her.

Santana's hair was pulled up and her movements were fluid if not a little sloppy. Quinn's body moved toward her before she knew she was doing it.

But who was that?

Puck was grinding up on Santana, moving his hands up and down her sides. Quinn grimaced, betting to herself that he hadn't washed them once that night. Or ever.

With renewed purpose she slipped through the crowd easily enough to come face to face with Santana so she could pull her towards her causing Puck to look over at her and raise his eyebrows.

Santana, on the other hand, opened her eyes and shouted "Quinn!" wrapping her arms around Quinn's neck they swayed on the spot as she held her as tight as she could.

"Hey, San." Quinn hugged her back and put her arms around her waist to keep them steady.

"Do you mind?" Puck leant toward Quinn so she could hear. She had her eyes closed but rolled them anyway.

Santana just murmured in her ear, "Let's dance, Q."

"Fuck off, Puck." Quinn spat, that anger she usually felt bubbling underneath her skin when she'd had a drink reared its head.

She saw the sweat on his top lip as he sneered at her and huffed before storming out through the back door.

Satisfied he'd been dealt with Quinn moved with Santana and rode out her high, loving it especially when Santana tickled her arms and neck. Quinn's eyes rolled to the back of her head for the second time that night. The events that transpired earlier came back to her and the more she thought back on that missed orgasm from Taylor the more she realised how turned on she still was.

…

Santana was enjoying this side of Quinn, she seemed to have let her hair down and was having a good time. A really good time by the hand she felt on her ass as they danced body pressed against body.

Quinn had this dopey grin on her face and kept looking at Santana's mouth. Every time Santana caught her she felt a twinge of want and what she wanted was Quinn to kiss her. Santana lightly scratched the back of Quinn's neck and like hitting a puppy's sweet itch spot Quinn's eyes fluttered.

It was getting too hot in here, Quinn's white tank was almost see-through with how wet it had gotten. She took Quinn's hands in hers and pulled her to the back door for some fresh air.

As soon as they stepped through the threshold, cool air hit their skin leaving trails of goosebumps all over their bodies. It was cooler than she had expected.

Santana stood close to Quinn's warm body as they stood off to the side. The porch lights illuminated Quinn's face and she saw her blown pupils and tight jaw. Her Quinny had really enjoyed herself tonight then, huh?

Santana pulled out a stick of gum from her bra and passed it to Quinn with a smirk.

"Thought you might need it more than me."

Quinn pulled her focus away from the dewy grass and steamy pool of Brittany's yard to look at her outstretched hand. She carefully took the gum, slowly unwrapping it before bringing it to her lips. The squeals and sound of splashing were drowned out by her thudding heart. They held eye contact as Quinn bit the strip in half. Almost agonizingly Quinn lifted her other hand to cup her face, training her eyes on Santana's mouth, willing it open with a look. Santana held no protest as Quinn slid the other half of gum into her mouth. Slender fingers brushed against her lips and before Quinn could pull away she closed her mouth around them.

Quinn let out a gasp and flicked her eyes back up to Santana's. If Quinn's eyes were not already dark they would have been by now. Quinn moved her hand from her hold of her cheek to the back of her neck as she slowly extracted her fingers. With a satisfying pop they were finally free and there was a split second of hesitation on Santana's part as she remembered they were in the presence of their whole year and then some, but she pushed the thought away when she saw three topless cheerleaders sprint and bomb into the pool. A kiss would be the last thing anybody would remember from tonight. If they remembered anything at all.

She took her barely-chewed gum out and stuck it under the railing of the porch, Quinn tutted at her actions before copying her anyway. Her mouth quirked with a smile that suggested she knew something that Santana didn't. And just like that Quinn closed the small distance between them. Their mouths met with a surprising tenderness that juxtaposed the chaos that surrounded them.

Feeling bolder in her decision, Santana closed her mouth over Quinn's bottom lip and deepened the kiss, slipping her tongue out to run it across Quinn's begging mouth. Quinn was eager to reciprocate, her grip on Santana's neck tightening as she pulled the other girl closer to her. Santana felt dizzy and so, so good. Maybe the drink was to blame, but maybe that kiss was hitting kind of different. Once separated they looked into each other's eyes as intently as their inebriated states would allow, breathless and flush.

...

Quinn was positively burning. Her mouth tingled and felt hot. She could feel a smile growing on her face as she held Santana's gaze, her face actually ached for it. Santana laughed lightly at the sight and pecked her mouth before returning the smile. Her eyes slightly unfocused but trained on her nonetheless.

"Swim?" Quinn asked, her voice coarse and laced with lust.

Santana nodded and that cued Quinn to strip. Goodbye useless tank and goodbye shorts. Standing in just her underwear Quinn felt the cool air brush more of her skin. One area in particular feeling quite cold all of a sudden. Luckily Quinn had worn light lace panties so how wet she was wasn't as blatantly apparent to everybody else as it was to her.

"You coming?" Santana's voice drew her back in and she saw that she was down to just her underwear too, her hand outstretched for Quinn to take.

Lacing their fingers they made their way across to the pool without crashing into anyone. Without stopping they jumped straight in to be immediately submerged into the (thankfully) warm water.

Santana came surging back to the surface almost as fast as she went under but saw that Quinn was nowhere in sight. "Qui- ahgh!" Hands grabbed onto her ankles and dragged her back under. It didn't take a genius to work out who pulled her under, the distinctive laugh of Quinn Fabray as she broke the surface once more only confirmed it.

"You bitch!" Santana swiped a splash of water at Quinn, but it only made her laugh harder.

"What?" Quinn's voice was an octave higher as she tried to play innocent, but her apparent amusement was doing her no favours on that front.

"You know what." Santana grabbed for Quinn and pulled her close, wrapping her arms around her waist as she moved them into a shallower depths so they could stand.

"Mmm, maybe I do." Quinn put her arms over Santana's shoulders, gathering her wet hair and softly squeezing some of the water out before letting it go to caress the back of her neck. "Just helping you on your road to swimdom."

Santana gave Quinn a look that told her she was not convinced. "Swimdom? I don't think that's even a word, Q."

"Sure it is. It means infiltrating a swimming team to help your psychopath coach out."

Santana nodded her head sagely, "Ah, yes of course."

Quinn let go of Santana when a chill ran through her to dip her body lower into the water so that her chin touched the surface. Santana mirrored her actions, their legs gliding across each other's, but not completely touching as they slowly moved closer to each other again.

"You're not going to do it are you?"

"I don't know."

Quinn slid lower until the water covered her mouth. They both were still for a short while, lost in their own thoughts. It was Quinn who broke her reverie first. Humming the theme song from _Jaws_ she slowly edged closer to the other girl. Santana gave her a perplexed look until she caught on to what she was doing. She tried to bite down her smile, but could feel herself failing miserably as she watched Quinn make her way toward her.

As ridiculous as it sounded Santana's heart actually began to speed up at the prospect of being chased, even if it was playfully. Backing up until she hit the edge of the pool Santana laughed out, "Stahp!" squealing when Quinn lurched out of the water to pretend attack her. In an act of self preservation Santana put her hand on Quinn's forehead and pushed her back down. Bubbles erupted from the water as Quinn fell back under.

Quinn gasped out a laugh when she resurfaced and wiped the hair out of her face and water out of her eyes. She approached Santana again, putting her arms either side of her on the pool's edge, trapping her in. She had a coy look on her face as she bit down on her lip. The action certainly drew Santana's attention.

As Quinn began to lean in Santana's gaze shot back up to her eyes. "What are you doing?"

Quinn's eyes flashed with challenge. "What does it look like I'm doing?"

She began to close the distance, but stopped before they made contact, her mouth ghosting Santana's.

"Quinn." Santana almost whispered out.

The moment was interrupted by a wave of water splashing them. Sam burst through the water whooping and encouraging somebody on the grass that the girls couldn't see.

"Sam!" Quinn snarled, smacking a splash of water back.

"Oh hey, Quinn!"

Just then the person Sam was shouting for jumped in, another wave hitting Quinn square in the face. Coughing out the water that got into her mouth Quinn felt soft hands take a hold of her arm as she was pulled to the side.

"Sorry, Baby Momma!" Puck apologised with about as much sincerity as she had patience for him. He very obviously found Quinn's disgruntled state highly amusing.

"I hate that fucking prick," Quinn muttered to Santana. "Call me that again you pig and see what you get!" Puck knew more than anyone that Beth was a sore spot, to be made fun of by him for it riled her up like nothing else.

Her Santana bubble had burst and this asshole was purposely trying to push her buttons.

Very drunk himself, Puck didn't think anything of it as he laughed in her face and made a remark under his breath to Sam. The action made Quinn's blood boil, she knew it wasn't worth getting into but at this point in the night her inhibitions were well and truly shot.

She moved to hit him, but felt that hold on her arm tug her back.

"Q, stop." When Quinn didn't turn to look back at the other girl, Santana tried to pull her attention by moving her face toward her. "Hey," she said softly.

Quinn almost complied, but she was too worked up, her heart hammered and her hands shook. She pulled away from the touch and lifted herself out of the pool without another word.


	5. Dream Team

Santana didn't move immediately as she watched Quinn walk back up the porch steps, not bothering to grab her clothes and head into the house.

The whole night had been a total rollercoaster.

_What the fuck is going on?_

Looking over to Sam and Puck she saw that the whole event was totally forgotten by them. They were too interested in trying to impress some of Taylor's college friends to give a shit about Quinn, they didn't even bat an eye in her direction. She didn't feel so drunk anymore.

Exiting the pool she made pace as she snatched up both their clothes on her way into the house. Guessing Quinn would be in a bathroom somewhere she pushed her way through the bodies left at the party. Things didn't seem as hectic, so it didn't take too much time to make it to the downstairs bathroom.

Knocking on the door before entering, Santana mentally patted herself on the back when she found Quinn sitting on the closed toilet seat with her head in her hands.

"Thought you might want these?" Santana held their clothes up in front of her, Quinn looked up in surprise as though she hadn't heard her come in.

"Tha- thanks."

"S'kay." Santana shrugged and crouched in front of her.

Santana placed a comforting hand on Quinn's thigh and rubbed it reassuringly, not saying anything in hopes that she would say something when she was ready. It took her by surprise when she saw the other girl's body begin to shake with sobs.

"It's so fucked that he says shit like that." Quinn gasped out, her breath stuttered as she tried to regain composure. "He knows I love Beth, he knows it and he knows I can't be her mom." She looked then into Santana's eyes, only to see them filling with tears too. "It hurts and I don't know what to do about it."

Santana took Quinn's hands in hers, "I didn't realise you felt like this."

"I'm good at hiding it. But maybe I'm sick of it, y'know?"

"Yeah, I know."

"I hate Cheerios and everything it means, I hate my dad for what he did and I resent the fact my mom let him kick me out. Sure she came around, but I was a kid! I was a fucking kid having a kid! I'm done. I really am just fucking over it." Quinn took a deep breath and slowly released it, her chin wobbled slightly as she did so. "I'm quitting Cheerios."

"Woah." It was a lot to take in for Santana, but she kept a hold of Quinn's hands, "Really? Are you sure?"

"I am." Quinn once again looked at Santana in the eye and nodded her head as though confirming the fact for herself more than anybody else.

"Shall we do it together?" Santana's tone took on a hint of conspiratorial mischief, the corner of her mouth twitching with a smirk she wasn't sure would be appropriate for the sombre mood.

Try as she might Quinn caught the smirk and began to smile because of it. "She won't know what hit her." Quinn's face was red and puffy from the tears she'd already shed. Emotions were still running high as more tears slipped down her face despite the smile that now graced it. Santana reached up and wiped them away.

"The old witch can stick it. It's me and you, baby." She pulled Quinn into a hug with a "c'mere" and a small chuckle at the thought of Sue's face on Monday.

…

It was starting to get bright out by the time Santana and Quinn reached Santana's front door. It must have been around six in the morning. With her heels hanging from her wrist Santana jimmied her key into the door, she missed the first few times as she turned to hush Quinn for whining at her for being cold. Finally tumbling through the threshold the two girls attempted to be as quite as they could. Quinn tripped up the stairs and felt Santana fall into the back of her.

"Ow!"

Quinn quickly turned and pressed her finger to Santana's mouth, "Shhh!" When Santana's eyes went cross-eyed looking at Quinn's finger, she couldn't help the giggles she felt creeping up on her. Santana couldn't believe the hypocrisy. She raised her eyebrows at Quinn and in turn slapped her hand over her mouth to stop any noise from waking her mom and sister up. The shock that registered on Quinn's face however only served to set Santana off. She had to suck her lips into her mouth as her body began to shake with the laugh she was trying to hold in.

Then something wet touched her hand. That felt like a- Quinn had licked her palm! The smile quickly fell from her face and she yanked her hand away with a look of disgust. "Ew! Quinn!" She began to wipe her hand on the back of Quinn's top.

"Don't touch me with that!"

"It's your spit!"

"What are you doing?"

Both girls' heads shot up to the top of the stairs. Lucia was standing in her running gear checking her reflection in the mirror. Santana had forgotten that Lucia would have been up already.

"Oh, hey there." Quinn said in a peculiar voice that had Santana giving a funny look. She might've been overselling the sober thing.

"You gonna block the way forever? I gots to go." Lucia began descending the stairs. Considering the compromising position the pair were in they seemed mighty cosy in her eyes.

Quinn went to stand, but Santana was still leaning against her, "San."

"Oh. Oh yeah, sorry." Santana was still looking at her sister, trying to comprehend the strange look she was giving. "I'm not drunk."

At that Lucia gave Santana a disbelieving look. "Okay, Drunky McDrunkerson."

"Don't tell mom."

"San, I'm not five and mom already left for work." Lucia decided to climb over the both of them instead of waiting any longer, patting Santana's head as she did, "See ya later, cutie."

Slapping her hand away Santana pouted, "Don't touch me."

"Why is your hair damp?"

"Why are you so annoying?"

"Love you, bye!" Lucia promptly ignored her sister and grabbed her drink and slamming the door on her way out. They both flinched at the sound and began slowly making it up the stairs without another peep. They both felt headaches coming on and could only think of sleep after the night they had.

...

Once in the cosy safety of Santana's room Santana grabbed some clothes for them to sleep in. They got dressed in relative silence with only the occasional glance to one another. The blinds were closed and their party clothes were forgotten in a pile on the floor by the time they were under the sheets.

"Thanks, San."

The duvet rustled as Santana turned to Quinn without saying anything. She didn't think words were necessary. She just shifted close and hugged her, revelling in the warmth of her body. Quinn wriggled further into the embrace, not being used to the affection but lapping up every bit of it.

After a while of laying there Santana couldn't help herself, "You smell like a pool."

Quinn pulled back slightly to give Santana a look, but it was pointless in the dark, "Gee, thanks San. You smell so much better."

"Shh, sleep time." Santana brought Quinn back down with a couple of soft taps of her head. It had Quinn rolling her eyes, but smiling nonetheless.

Whilst the rest of the world began to wake and the birds began chirping, the pair quickly fell asleep wrapped up in one another.

...

When they woke up it was mid-afternoon and they were both competing for world's worst hangover. Quinn woke up first and got a face full of morning breath from Santana that had her rolling away from her. She dragged herself up to sit on the edge of the bed. Bad idea. She closed her eyes to stop the room spinning. The groan from behind her told her that Miss Sunshine herself had woken up too.

"My brain is throbbing harder than..."

"Don't finish that."

"Mmhmm." Santana couldn't be bothered to argue. She slung her arm over her eyes and willed her body to move.

In the silence of the room Quinn could hear noise from downstairs, "Is that Luc?"

"Probs." Santana cracked an eye open and saw that Quinn was now up and patting down her hair that was mussed from sleep. Her eye lingered on the motion, then on her friend's face.

The memory of last night was hazy in parts and almost non-existent in others, but she sure as hell remembered kissing Quinn. She knew she liked it and she guessed Quinn definitely knew it too. The idea that Quinn had kissed her because she was drunk and high hurt her more than she'd have liked to admit, it wasn't just an ego thing, it was a her and Quinn thing. Would Quinn be weird with her now? Would she think that Santana was obsessed and in love with her on top of it? She didn't want to go through the same thing she went through with Brittany. She didn't want to harm a friendship because of deeper feelings. It made her feel sick.

"What are you staring at?" Quinn caught Santana's eyes through the mirror, squinting at her as she watched her get all flustered.

"Me? Er, nothing? Nothing." She whipped her covers back and went to slip out the door, "I'm going for a shower." And she was gone. If Quinn had blinked she would've missed her.

_Weird._

Quinn shook her head to herself and grabbed a few things out of Santana's drawers to make herself somewhat presentable to whoever was downstairs. She actually managed to find an old pair of shorts of her own, she had been wondering where they had gotten to.

…

Lucia was making food. A task that took all of her concentration to avoid disaster. She was pattering around the kitchen minding her business when Quinn cleared her throat and gave a small, awkward wave.

"Hey."

"Morning, sunshine. Well I suppose it's afternoon now."

"Yeah, sorry about earlier, I didn't even think about you being in."

"Oh, thanks Quinn." Lucia quipped.

"Not like that."

Lucia smiled, "I know, just messing." She looked back to Quinn as she rummaged the fridge and saw that she was drawing patterns on the kitchen counter. "You have fun last night?"

A bashful smile snuck up on Quinn before she could measure it and she turned her head away to hide it, pretending to cough a little. When she felt like she had it under wraps she nodded to Lucia, who was now eyeing Quinn suspiciously. She was seriously too much like Santana. Why did Quinn feel guilty all of a sudden? Like she had committed a crime or something?

"Yeah, I had a lot of fun actually."

"Hmm, what kind of fun would that be then?" Lucia was now blatantly not looking for food, but standing by the door of the fridge, hand on hip and looking straight at Quinn.

"Oh, you know." Quinn felt like she was under interrogation and she didn't understand why.

Lucia just raised her eyebrow and gave her a pointed look. "Quinn, did you get it on with my sister?"

Quinn choked on air. She wasn't sure how, but she did. "What?" She squeaked out, unable to control the high pitch to her voice.

"Simple question, Quinn. I'm not stupid, I know she's gay. I didn't know you were though." Lucia looked thoughtful at this, genuinely thinking it over.

"I.. I.." Quinn cleared her throat, "I'm not, I mean… I'm not?" Quinn was in a slight panic mode, but then she thought about how she felt last night and how she had no objections to what had transpired between herself and Santana (Taylor too, if she's thinking about the whole thing). "Actually, I don't know yet."

"That's cool, Quinn. I'm not interrogating you," _Could've fooled me_ , Quinn thought, "I saw how you were this morning and thought maybe something was going on."

"Nothing's going on." _Yet._ The thought surprised Quinn. Could her and Santana be like that?

"Okay." Lucia noted it away for future and resumed her never ending search for whatever she was after. "You want any food? We have cereal and stuff, I suppose it is kinda morning for you still."

"Yeah okay, thanks." Quinn nodded and let her mind wander to the night before.

…

The weekend passed fairly quickly, Quinn left Santana to recover from her hangover to go and do the same in her own bed. They texted on Sunday about their plan for Monday, Santana couldn't really believe that Quinn would give up her position so easily, but she couldn't blame her for feeling the way she did. It was hard being a Cheerio, not just physically, but it took a mental toll too.

Not to mention the ridiculous temperament of Sue, she might have been a force that created winners, but it was at the cost of being able to be a teenager. She didn't know one other school where their cheerleaders had to wear their uniform all day every day. The constant berating, the stupid food fads, the many questionable tales of her past… If she wanted any of those things in her life she could just go and visit her abuela on her dad's side more often.

Dressed in her own clothes, with her hair down, uniform folded and packed into her bag, Santana psyched herself up to go and pick up Quinn. The familiar feeling of floundering in the face of feelings she didn't want to think about rose within her, but she pushed it all back down and hoped that Quinn was sans uniform too.

…

Quinn was hoping the same a few doors down, she had thought about not going through with it, but was determined to stick to her guns. It was secretly thrilling to be doing something so against what she'd normally be so horrified to do. She felt like she was changing and growing out of that old image of herself, for the better or worse she wasn't too sure, but she was going to have to lean into it to find out.

Climbing into the passenger side of Santana's car she saw the other girl visibly relax at the sight of her in her regular clothes. Santana must've been having the same doubts she was and it reassured Quinn that she wasn't alone in this. Even though they'd only rekindled their friendship recently, she felt closer to Santana than ever. She was one of the few people she felt she could trust and rely on at this point. Perhaps her past transgressions were the reason for her lack of support, but there was nothing to be done now. Anyway, nobody was perfect, a fact she'd bitterly been coming to terms with as of late. The image she'd crafted and maintained was what she imagined perfection was; the reality being sorely disappointing.

"Hey, Q."

"Hey, San."

"You ready for today?"

"Yeah, I suppose I am. What's the worst that could happen?"

"I think a lot, but we'll be fine." Santana looked uncertainly at Quinn. "Right?"

Santana's worry overrode any hesitation Quinn was having. She was a leader for a reason. Putting on a brave face she nodded with a smile and took Santana's hand, "Of course."

"Okay, cool."

Quinn felt a smirk creeping up on her, "Hmm, totally cool."

The teasing tone didn't go unnoticed, Santana reached over to shove Quinn, "Shut up."

"Hey!" Quinn grabbed at her hands and held them tightly to stop Santana from pushing her, "Whatcha gonna do now?"

Quinn was certain she'd caught Santana look down at her lips before she moved her body over the centre console. Quinn wasn't sure what Santana was going to do, but the warmth of her body over hers distracted her from the hold she had on her hands.

Suddenly, she felt her seat lurching backwards and Santana falling slightly further on top of her. Santana had pulled the seat's lever to send her backward, only she hadn't anticipated the force in which Quinn would go back and collided with the door.

"Ow!" Santana leaned back from her slumped position against the door and used Quinn's thigh as leverage to hold herself up. "That's twice you've injured me."

"Me!?" Quinn guffawed.

"Yes." Santana was uncomfortably sat with half her body on Quinn's side, very much aware of where her hand was. They would have to leave eventually, but she liked teasing Quinn. Although it was more Quinn teasing her at this point, which she found herself liking even better.

"You're just a glutton for punishment, what can I say?" Quinn readjusted her seat, causing Santana to wobble a little in her place. Precarious as it was, Santana didn't move away and only tightened her grip. "We should get going," Quinn said in a lower tone, "it's what I pay you for, after all."

"Pfft, I wish." Santana climbed back over to her side and clipped in her belt. "Safety first," she told Quinn quite seriously. Putting the car into gear she pulled off at a more moderate speed than she was used to getting about. She would have been lying if she said she wasn't nervous about Sue's reaction, but that trepidation was alleviated somewhat by having Quinn by her side. The thought actually made her smile. It was nice to not feel so alone.


	6. Miss Nicey-Nice

They had since gone their separate ways to get to class, agreeing to see each other at some point in the day, whether it be at lunch or in one of their classes.

Quinn was playing it cool, she didn't want to freak Santana out by following her everywhere and anyway, she'd never been the desperate type so she wasn't about to start.

It didn't stop her thoughts from wandering.

Even in her first class that morning her mind kept returning to that night, she'd had the whole weekend to think about it. Yet there she was, mindlessly doodling, mind away with the fairies, reliving every little bit of it.

The rhythmic, repetitive motion of her wrist entranced her further as she tried to dissect what Santana might've thought of their kiss. What did she think of Quinn's forwardness? She felt embarrassment suddenly creep up on her, but batted it away when she remembered the soft touch of Santana's lips on hers.

Her movement came to a halt when she felt somebody nudging her.

"Did you hear me?"

Quinn tilted her head in the palm of her other hand toward Mercedes. She'd almost forgotten who was beside her.

"Uh-huh." Quinn sighed, her mind already slipping back into the memories of that night. What could have happened if Puck hadn't ruined everything? The thought completely consumed her, various scenarios played out in her head for that brief time before Mercedes nudged her again.

"Yeah right, girl." Mercedes had a slight knowing smirk on her face. "I've been spilling all the hottest goss from Brittany's and you've not batted an eye to any of it!"

Quinn sat up straighter to give the impression she was actually engaged in the conversation. "Go ahead."

"Right, okay. Now I've got to start from the beginning. I can't believe you and Satan didn't even turn up until after everyone and their mother started to arrive, you must've been _busy_. You missed some juicy stuff…" Mercedes paused to gauge Quinn's response, which seemed strange to Quinn. Seemingly not getting what she was looking for Mercedes continued. "Rachel and Finn broke up, she got super wasted early on and he kept complaining she was too clingy and they had an argument that made him leave. Such a drag to be honest. Luckily Kurt was there to pick up the pieces and she stuck around."

"Oh." Quinn wasn't sure why this was considered juicy, didn't they break up already?

"Lauren royally swerved Puck, oh man," Mercedes broke out into an all too amused grin, "that was hilarious. You should've seen him. But he sure got over it, I saw him all over Santana later on."

Quinn stiffened hearing it, she knew that they were together at some point in the night, she saw it, but it didn't stop her responding to the unpleasant reminder. The disdain must've been apparent because Mercedes made a noise in agreement.

"What about you, Q? You were missing for half the night, I barely even saw you after the body shots you did off of one of those college guys." Mercedes raised a brow in question.

The grimace Quinn made had Mercedes cracking up, "What!" Quinn harshly whispered. Thank God she didn't remember that, as if she wasn't mortified enough about saying Santana's name with Taylor.

She must've given something else away by the mere thought of the other girl as Mercedes eagerly asked her what had gone down. What was the worst that could happen? This was Mercedes. Yes, maybe she was a huge gossip but they were friends and she wouldn't spread anything around. At least she hoped.

"Do you swear not to say anything?" Quinn looked Mercedes dead in the eye.

Mercedes' eyes gave away her excitement, she'd kept her cards close to her chest this whole time in hopes that Quinn would spill. "Of course. I swear."

"Right, okay." Quinn fidgeted a bit in her seat before deciding to just come out with it. "Do you know Taylor?" Mercedes shook her head, this was not going the way she thought it would. "She's Brittany's cousin." The other girl nodded. "Well..." Quinn took a deep breath, "I'm pretty sure I almost slept with her. I mean maybe I kinda did? The logistics aren't important right now." Quinn's tone was taught, she was nervous.

Mercedes looked on in shock. "Quinn!" Quinn's eyebrows shot to her hairline, she didn't know how Mercedes would respond in all honesty. "You little devil, you!"

Quinn cracked a smile and couldn't help the small chuckle she let slip at Mercedes' response. Mercedes let out a laugh too, only to hurry to hush herself when the girl in front of them turned to look at them. She shot her a look that told her to mind her business.

"Is that what has you all distracted?" Quinn's face immediately began to heat up, the more she tried to stop herself the hotter she got.

"Erm." Quinn tried to duck her head away from her friend to gather herself. "There might be something else."

Impatient, Mercedes shimmied in her seat and shuffled closer. "Spill, you dirty dog."

"IkissedSantana." It all came out in a hushed rush of breath that made Quinn's need for discretion quite obvious.

"I knew it!"

Quinn did not expect that. Her head snapped up to look at Mercedes and saw her beaming and looking thoroughly pleased with herself.

"Girl, you had me there! I thought I must've seen wrong, but no, I knew it had to be you kissing Little Miss Santana on that porch."

Quinn was now blushing harder than she'd ever done in her life. "Shh!"

"Aw, look at you! All red and shy!" Mercedes wanted to laugh, she really did, she'd never seen Quinn like this.

"Oh my God." Quinn covered her face in attempt to hide herself.

Mercedes was having none of it though and pulled her hands away, holding them as she prodded for more information. "So what was that about? And don't worry, I won't say anything. You can trust me." She gave a gentle squeeze to Quinn's hands.

"I know that, I do. And honestly, I don't know. I wanted it to happen, which is confusing but I'm not bothered by the fact. Do you know what I mean?" Quinn took a quick scope of the class and saw that others were too involved in their own conversations to care what they were talking about. "I'm not questioning myself, I don't feel scared. Like maybe I'm gay or bi or whatever. That's not the thing that's eating at me." Her voice became quieter and urgent as she went on, as though she had been thinking about this for a while. "I've already had a baby," she chuckled a little darkly at that, "so what's another thing to disappoint my family?" She took a small pause. That wasn't a route she wanted to go down right now. "No, it's not that. It's the Santana of it all."

Mercedes had been diligently listening to Quinn's ramblings, appreciating that perhaps Quinn didn't get to do this a lot. She liked knowing that Quinn could rely on her and she liked to think she could rely on Quinn. Nodding to what she was hearing she began to think back over Quinn and Santana getting closer lately and it didn't seem so far-fetched that somebody in the equation could catch feelings.

"She's not exactly an open book and we've not really spoken about it. Maybe it was just a kiss to her and it's not like I want to bring it up and make myself look like an idiot."

"Hey, well from where I was standing she seemed into it." Mercedes seemed to reconsider what she said, "I wasn't staring or anything!" At Quinn's lack of response she continued, "I think the smart thing to do here is play it cool."

"Cool?"

"Yeah, can you handle that?"

Quinn narrowed her eyes at Mercedes, "I can do cool." The defiance was clear in her tone. "I'm quite the ice queen in fact."

Mercedes gave her an amused look and chuckled, "That is so goddamn corny. You gotta work on that." Quinn huffed but listened anyway. "Just be your cute self and see how it goes. Even if you're not panicked it doesn't mean Santana isn't."

Quinn only made a noise in agreement and turned back to her paper to think on it.

What was Mercedes to do with these girls?

"And anyway, I thought you two had already hooked up." That had Quinn's attention again. "Yeah, I mean we thought if her and Britt were at it then you were in on it too. Who knows what's in the water at those cheer camps?" Mercedes couldn't help cracking a smile at the picture of horror Quinn's face was painting.

"Are you being serious?"

At Mercedes' burst of laughter Quinn shoved her in her chair, only serving to make the other girl laugh harder.

Quinn wasn't backward in coming forward, testing the waters with Santana didn't scare her in the way it might others. Her main concern was how Santana might take it. She didn't want to push her away by being too much too soon. Mercedes was right, she was just going to have to play it cool and see where it went.

It wasn't like she didn't have other things to worry about.

…

Santana felt on edge, she was waiting for the moment that Sue decided to rear her head and chew her out. Luckily, she had made it until lunch without being detained and was eagerly awaiting Quinn to get her ass over to their table in cafeteria.

She had to admit that she had grown to like the dorks in Glee club. However, it did not stop her from feeling very conscious of the fact that she was sitting with them instead of the Cheerios across the way. She tried to not let it faze her as she listened to Kurt ramble on about some guy he thought was cute. To be honest, she didn't actually mind the distraction and to watch him get all flustered when she teased him about having a crush was kind of sweet too.

"So when are we gonna meet this guy?" Santana leaned in with her head resting on her hand.

"Well…" Kurt stalled and didn't move to answer.

"How about we all have a get together?" Rachel piped up.

"What kind of get together are we talking about here, Berry?"

"The kind where we go bowling, or get pizza, maybe even both."

"Woah, don't go crazy! One thing at a time, I don't think I could handle all of the excitement." Santana gave Rachel a smirk that was more playful than biting. "Would you be inviting Finny-boy?"

"It would only be fair," Rachel shrugged her shoulders, "we're still a team. He should at least have the option to come."

"That's very adult of you." Santana commented.

"Yes, well, I am very mature for my age." Santana could practically see Rachel's ego expand before her and was eternally thankful when she felt somebody sit in the space beside.

"Look at you being all nice." Quinn's voice actually made her heart race, she felt herself grinning as soon as she heard it.

_Pull it together, Lopez._

"That's me now. Miss Nicey-Nice." Santana tuned out the others and ignored the snort from Rachel as she turned her attention on Quinn. She still looked as good as she did that morning. Only now her hair was a little less put together and her dress was creased from where she must've been fiddling with it throughout the day. It was both hot and cute at the same time. _No fair._

Quinn wasn't looking at her as she looked for something in her bag, but Santana could see the upturn of her mouth at what she said. "Well, Miss Nicey-Nice, how do you feel about being an absolute doll and holding this for a sec?" Quinn held out a bottle for Santana to take and put her bag away.

Santana tried to unscrew it, 'tried' being the operative word, "God Quinn, why's it so tight?"

At this point Mercedes had made her way over and had overheard, "That's what she said." Quinn shot Mercedes a look, but seemed amused all the same. Santana, however, felt herself heat up out of sheer discomfort. She was the last person to be called a prude, it was just that the whole situation with Quinn was new territory. It made her kind of defensive, okay? She knew from experience that fallin- erm… _liking_ your best friend was bad news and she wasn't ready to come out and be exposed like that.

On the other hand, she couldn't deny the buzz of excitement she felt around Quinn, how she wanted to be around and thought about her all the time. Santana prided herself on being intelligent, but holy fuck did girls make her dumb. This is what Finn must feel like all the time. She shook her head to herself. _Poor guy._

"Here let me do that." Quinn took the bottle from her hands, bringing Santana out of her musings. Quinn used the material of her dress to twist the cap off and took a swig before handing it back to Santana.

"Thanks." Santana said quietly, she took a sip herself and looked to the rest of the table to see what they were talking about as she took a moment to collect herself.

"Hey, are you okay?" Quinn had lowered her voice as not to be heard by the others as she ducked her head toward Santana.

Santana nodded and gave Quinn a secret smile to reassure her. "Yeah."

Quinn looked sceptical, but didn't ask again, she just smiled back and spoke with Mercedes about having a girls' night sometime in the future. Santana watched Quinn talk out of the corner of her eye and made to look like she was listening to Kurt and Rachel until she felt Quinn place her hand on her thigh.

Now that was hard to ignore.

The table they were at hid where her hand was so she wasn't too concerned about anyone seeing. It wasn't like she hated the touch either.

Santana placed Quinn's bottle on the table, still without looking directly at Quinn, and slipped her own hand down and on top of other girl's. She walked her fingers over Quinn's knuckles, catching her smiling at the action. She made her fingers do a little dance that had Quinn's smile widening and Mercedes wondering what she was saying to make Quinn cheese so hard at her.

Santana must've been regressing, because the butterflies she had from hardly any contact had her feeling like a twelve year old. The small touch of Quinn's hand and the silly secrecy of their interaction were making her heart beat that much faster.

"I mean Santana would agree," the sound of her name pulled her attention back to Kurt slightly, "wouldn't you?"

Mindlessly nodding Santana managed out a vacant, "Uh-huh."

Suddenly Quinn flipped her hand and clasped their hands together, their fingers interlocked and palms hot against another's.

"Really?" Rachel's disbelief was not hard to miss.

Santana couldn't care less. She bit back a smile as she looked at Rachel's perplexed expression and nodded.

"Huh. Never had you down as a Sondheim kind of girl. I suppose Madeline Kahn does have an irresistible charm about her in Company."

Santana stared at her blankly, looked to Quinn, then back to Rachel.

"Absolutely."

…

The end of the day was fast approaching and for that Quinn was thankful. That was until she was struck still in the hallway as her eye caught Sue's.

Taking a deep breath she steeled herself and approached her old coach, she was going to rip the band aid off. She had made her bed and now she was going to lie in it.

"Quinn."

"Coach."

There was no bitterness to either address. However, there was an undercurrent of disappointment in Sue's that bit at Quinn's pride.

"Come with me, if you would." Sue began to walk, not toward her office, instead toward the fields that weren't occupied due to it being the last period of the day. Quinn would be missing her last class, but she wasn't about to start arguing now.

They were quiet on their walk and Quinn respected the silence. She knew Sue was a tyrant in many ways, but she had given her a second chance when she asked for it and when not many would. The absurd loyalty she felt towards Sue was in a lot of ways messed up considering she dropped her on her ass when she was found out to be pregnant, but she also raised Quinn to a higher level - to an untouchable level that protected her for so long.

She was the reason Quinn felt worthy for a long time.

Quinn felt she had begun to let go of her dependence on popularity and those expectations of her. The prospect of losing it all still scared her shitless, but what was life if it not doing one fucking thing after another that scared you?

She just had to keep it together and stick it out.

"Why didn't you come to me?" Sue spoke clearly and outwardly.

"I was scared." There was no point in lying.

"I'm disappointed, Q, I have to be honest. You're one of my more promising Cheerios." Sue held her arms behind her back as she maintained a stroll. "I actually see a lot of myself in you."

Despite the sentiment Quinn inwardly cringed at the idea of even being remotely similar to Sue. She knew she was no saint, but the comparison seemed like a stretch.

"You're ambitious, smart, old Hollywood beautiful. All qualities we share. And no punches are pulled with you." Sue let out a dreary sigh. "Oh how you've wounded me."

"Coach, I just can't do it anymore."

"I know." She was quiet then, a serious expression taking over her features. "And I'm guessing Sandbags isn't going undercover for me is she?" It was a rhetorical question, Quinn knew that. Sue seemed to get lost in thought as she murmured under her breath, something about Roz and laxatives. They walked together some more across the fields, eventually looping their way back around to the school.

"Leave your uniforms on my desk. I'll have to burn them to exercise the quitter spirit." There was finality to the words - sadness too. When they came to a stop outside of one of the school entrances Sue turned and looked to Quinn. "Well good luck with those bunch of losers," she reached out and put her hand on Quinn's shoulder, surprising the girl, "you're going to be just fine, Q. You know where I'll be."

Whether it was the sincerity of the words or the fact that she really needed to hear them from an adult in her life, Quinn felt tears burning behind her eyes. She tilted her head back a little and dabbed her eyes to keep them at bay.

Breathing out she said, "Thanks, Coach." Sue gave Quinn a small resigned smile. "Really."

"Don't go soft on me now." Sue dropped her hand and held the door open for Quinn to go inside before her. "Brittany is going to be ecstatic with captain."

That roused a small laugh out of Quinn, it was only slightly gurgled by the lump in her throat. "Yep."

"Now get to class." With that Sue strode down the hallway, unrelenting even when shouldering into a passing student who was sent reeling into the lockers. The sight kept the smile on her face as she thought back to when Santana did something similar all that time ago.

How things had changed since then.

…

Later that day in Glee Santana found herself caught up in a conversation about Lord Tubbington's misadventures with Artie of all people.

"I swear that fat bastard hates me." She regaled. "Every time I go to Britt's he's there watching and waiting. One of these days my guard will be down and he'll put poison in my food or something."

"Oh my god, I totally get that." Artie very seriously agreed. Finally he had someone who could relate! "He hisses at me constantly."

"Guys, be nice. He's just having a hard time." Brittany came over to join them. "He's very self-conscious and he feels judged."

"Stop feeding him so much then, B." Santana said, only to have Brittany pout back.

"It's not just me! He gets fed by every house in the neighbourhood; he's a real food slut."

Santana snorted just as Quinn came in and sat next to her.

"Hey, Q." She greeted.

"Hey, San. Artie. Britt." She nodded to the other two and got settled into her seat.

Artie seemed to turn a little pink when Quinn addressed him, Santana thought nothing of it as the other two slid away to sit themselves nearer Tina and Mike so that Brittany could brainstorm a new dance idea.

"I spoke to Coach."

That immediately put Santana on edge; she thought they might've gotten away with it today. "And?"

"And she said to leave our uniforms in her office." Santana didn't say anything, prompting Quinn to continue. "She was weirdly fine, no declarations of ruining our lives or anything like that. I think she's just disappointed." Quinn shrugged, deciding to keep the heart-felt moment between herself and Sue private.

"Oh," Santana sounded surprised, almost disappointed, "that's it? I was almost breaking out in hives over _that_?" She scrunched her face up in confusion for a moment, eventually settling on a semi-satisfied shrug herself. "Meh. Suppose I'll have to live with it."

"Yeah I suppose so." Quinn was tickled by Santana's reaction.

"Onwards and upwards then, huh, Q?" Santana gave Quinn one of her devilish smirks as she leaned back in her chair and raised an eyebrow in the other girl's direction.

"Onwards and upwards." Quinn gave as good as she got and gave a sly smile back.

Santana felt lighter already. She couldn't believe it. No more Cheerios to worry about, it felt kind of unreal. The uncertainty of where she stood in the school hierarchy had skated around the periphery of her mind but she tried not to let it dampen her mood.

She looked down at her shoes and let her mind wander, a smile itching its way onto her face. If she was being real she was elated.

Another foot came into her line of sight and knocked into her's deliberately. She looked up to find Quinn smiling softly at her.

It was the wink that accompanied the smile that just about melted her heart.


	7. Pink!

Santana had been feeling restless. A few weeks had passed since she and Quinn had given up their uniforms and she was itching to do something. That something was yet to be decided, but she needed to get rid of some of her energy.

The world had yet to end in regards to no longer being a cheerleader, which was great. But it was the lost feeling that came with it that wasn't exactly a welcome addition to her already ever-ongoing inner-turmoil. She missed the competitiveness. Maybe she sometimes missed the barbed words she exchanged with her old teammates. What could she say? They spat venom that was worthy of retaliation. With them she wasn't punching down when they pissed her off, and the ones that started with her were equally bitchy. It was fair game.

And anyway, all the time she was spending with Quinn was turning her into a puddle of mush. She had escaped the claws of a raving lunatic in a tracksuit to be drowned by the dreamy voice and long eyelashes of Quinn Fabray. If she was going to figure out the mess that was her gay-ass feelings, she was going to have to be able to clear her mind.

Exercise was what worked for her. She couldn't count the number of times she solved one of her life's many problems after a roll in the sack with Brittany. And since sex was off the table - _for now_ , she thought, and then half-heartedly admonished her dirty mind for doing so - she was going to have to venture into the other extracurricular activities her fine school offered.

She was at home after another boring day at McKinley, kicking her legs as they dangled over the arm of her favourite chair in the living room. Lucia was doing her homework on the floor humming some mindless tune that had Santana going almost insane trying to figure out what it was from. She could've just asked, but where was the fun in that?

Her phone buzzed on her chest and she saw a notification for a text from Quinn pop up.

_Did u put this drawing in my bag?_

Santana had almost forgotten about that.

_My head in not that big! And making fun of me for liking the scooby-doo films is just mean_

_Ruh-roh, Rinny.. am I in trouble?_

_You will be! I told u tht in confidence_

_And I drew you a cute lil pic... I think u suit the whole scrappy vibe_

_Just you wait_

_Ooo Quinn don't get me all excited like that_

Santana knew she was pushing it considering her whole self-proclaimed need for clarity. But fuck, it was almost too easy and she wanted to see what Quinn would say.

Those three dots were going for a pretty long time. Maybe this wasn't a good idea?

_Wait until I get my hands on u.._

_Don't threaten me with a good time_

_Who says it's a threat? I follow thru_

Abort. Abort. Fuck.

"Why do you look like you're about to blow your load?"

_What the fuck?_

"What the fuck?" Santana's couldn't believe what she just heard.

"You talking to Quinn?"

"Again, what the fuck?"

"I could hear your heavy breathing from here, you heathen."

"I was not heavily breathing, first of all. And 'blow your load'? Aren't you like two?" Santana's shock had almost overridden how turned-on that conversation was making her. Shit. Quinn.

_Don't pretend u didn't like it Quinnifer, the next time I'm at urs I'll see that it has pride of place above ur bed so u get to see it every morning_

Okay, good. Back into safe territory. Hopefully, Quinn wasn't too miffed by the long pause and blatant back-track.

Turning back to her sister, who had resumed humming and doing her homework, she continued, "Second of all," Lucia let out an exasperated sigh that was very much exaggerated for effect, "why would it be Quinn?"

Lucia looked at her sister like she was one brain cell away from being categorised as a less developed species. "Because you're in love with her, duh."

"I, I... I am not!" Lucia had a shit-eating grin on her face as she watched her get all flustered. "We're friends."

"Yeah, okay."

"Did you have to say that so sarcastically?"

" _Noooo."_

"Mom should've left you at the hospital."

Lucia was an old hand when it came to her big sister, she wouldn't take the bait. "But for real, you get all squirmy about her. I think you have a big fat lesbian crush on her."

"Okay, Janice." Santana rolled her eyes, but having the topic come up like this was kind of nice. She hadn't been sure about how to come out to her sister and it looked like she didn't have to. It was mainly her mom and abuela she had to sweat it over now.

Santana's dad had never been in her life, she didn't know a lot about him and was too scared to even ask at this point. Judging by the fire that lit up her abuela's eyes at the mere mention of him she guessed it was best to leave it alone. The couple of times she had stayed with her dad's mom she didn't talk about anything but herself, so it wasn't like she wanted to go down that rabbit hole with his side of the family either. She still had that lingering curiosity, but she could live without knowing him.

The relationship she held with her father's side was tenuous to non-existent. Her mother tried as hard as she could to foster some kind of bond with them for Santana's sake, but it didn't work out. She hadn't seen any of them in a long time and she didn't miss them so much as missing the idea of having a big, close family. Especially when she would spend Thanksgiving at Brittany's and she'd have more cousins than hairs on her head running around. Sure, they were annoying as fuck, but it would've been nice to have had that when she was growing up.

As for Lucia's dad, he wasn't really in involved since the divorce with their mom, he still sent money and had Lucia for the holidays every other year, but they weren't close. He was nice and all, but distance put the brakes on any deep connection she might've hoped for in a father figure. The very expensive gifts he would give Lucia to give to her didn't hurt though. Money couldn't buy you love, but it sure could buy her some goodies.

Their mom had always been a hard worker, to the detriment to their relationship at times. Santana sometimes couldn't help the feeling that her mom would rather be at work than around her. Even after she got remarried and could afford to not do so many hours, she soon got pregnant with her sister, then there was a baby to worry about and Santana took the backseat again. That's where her abuela came in. When she was a baby, her abuela would care for her, and yeah, she could give the devil a hiding on a good day, but she was like her second mom. Santana worshiped the ground she walked on.

Don't get her wrong, she loved her mom to death, it's just how things had worked out. Whereas Lucia had the better relationship with their mom, Santana had her abuela.

It worried her that she might not take it well with her being devoutly Catholic and very conservative - not exactly the kind of combination you'd want in a person you're coming out to.

Maybe she could keep it quiet for a little longer. It had eaten away at her for this long.

What would be a few more weeks? Shit, _weeks_? Maybe after high school then?

Santana's stomach flipped at the thought.

"If you want I can be your wingman." Lucia moved into an upright position, seemingly liking the sound of her own idea.

"I don't need a wingman."

"No? When are you going to make a move then?"

"How about never? Quinn isn't gay."

"That's not what I heard."

This girl would be the death of her. "What?"

"No, ignore me. You're right, as always." Lucia stood and started collecting her things, "I'll just go ahead and take my interfering self upstairs." Lucia started to hurriedly stride out of the room before Santana could stop her.

"Hey!" Santana hopped up and chased after her, Lucia squealed as she heard the thumping sound of her sister following her up the stairs. "What are you talking about?" Santana caught her sister's ankle and yanked her to a stop.

Lucia damned herself for almost making it to the landing. She fell forward, dropping all of her things, "Look, now I've made a mess."

"I don't care." Santana clambered the rest of the way up and sat next to her sister. "What have you heard?"

"I'm not at liberty to say." Lucia mimicked zipping her mouth shut.

"You've done this on purpose. Why are you messing with me?"

Lucia pretended to respond, making noises through her closed mouth. Santana gave her a dirty look that told her she wasn't impressed. Lucia only pointed to her mouth and shrugged her shoulders.

Santana couldn't believe she was doing this; she leant over and acted as though she was unzipping her sister's mouth. "Spill."

Lucia took a big, gasping breath before she spoke, "Well, a little birdie told me that they weren't sure about all that." She waved her hands about to motion all of 'that' she was talking about.

"I don't understand."

"Yes you do." Lucia stood up as Santana remained seated, looking confused. "Now if you don't mind," she moved to her bedroom door and opened it, "I bid you farewell." With that she slammed the door shut and left her sister to dwell.

_Quinn likes girls?_

_Quinn likes girls._

_Fuck._

Santana sighed. What was she going to do?

…

Quinn was starting to like the freedom that being a regular high school student brought. What she wasn't bagging on was the extra time to contemplate the crisis that was her future and her life in general.

Santana aside, her school performance was still struggling after Beth and the sight of Puck made her want to hurl a book at his stupid head. The looming dark cloud that told her Lima was going to be forever was sending her into tailspin.

That was not obvious for the most part, because she was an excellent pretender. She'd done it her whole life. Pretending to be the perfect daughter, the perfect Christian, the perfect student, the perfect… everything. It made her crazy.

And now she was none of those things and it made it worse.

When she was with her friends she could almost feel normal, she could breathe easy with Mercedes and even laugh with Rachel.

It was in those quiet moments when she had said her goodbyes to Santana and everybody else that killed her. Almost every day, once it was time to go back to the place she would call home, she would bypass the living room and the kitchen and every other room before her own. Once she had gotten the door open she would drop her bag and lay on her bed for an hour or so before moving again.

She'd lie there taking in the day. What did she learn? Who was she nice to? What did they think of her? Did they think of her?

Then her phone would buzz and it'd be Santana, most of the time, telling her about something annoying her sister had done. Or it'd be that she'd found an old drawing that Quinn had made for her when they were kids. Seeing that name pop up on her screen had been a blessing every time.

Before Santana had come back into her life, Quinn truly believed that she'd go nowhere after high school, being a Cheerio was as good as it was going to get. She'd marry some meathead, have another baby, and hope for the best.

But now she had an inkling of hope. Wherever Santana was going she wanted to be able to go too.

Quitting Cheerios was the first step. Finding herself was the next.

"Quinn?" Judy's voice floated down the hall to her daughter's bedroom . "Quinn, dear? Are you in?" There was a soft rasp at the door before Judy opened it up and took in the disarray that Quinn's usually clean room was in. She heard rustling about in the en suite. "I thought we could go for a bite to eat. We've not really seen each other in a while," Judy let out a self-conscious laugh before quieting herself.

"No thanks, mom." Quinn's voice was muffled behind the door and was followed by the distinctive sound of clattering metal on tiled floor. "Fuck."

"What are you doing in there?" Judy already had her hand on the door's handle, slowly twisting it before Quinn's voice stopped her.

"Wait! Hang on, hang on. I'll be out in a second."

Judy briefly took a seat on Quinn's bed, soon deciding she couldn't stand the mess and was up again, picking clothes off the floor. Quinn's uniform wasn't here. Thinking about it, she hadn't seen it in a while and hadn't really thought about it until now.

In her ruminations she didn't hear the click of the door opening, only when Quinn said, "Here," did she turn around.

Judy immediately dropped everything she was holding and rushed over to her daughter, "Quinn!" She took a handful of Quinn's short, pink hair and let out a strangled screech. "What have you done?"

"Let go of me!" Quinn pushed her mother's now loose grip away from her freshly cut and dyed hair and braced herself for her mother's dramatics.

"It's! It's.." Judy wildly gestured around Quinn's head. "It's pink!"

Judy's wide-eyed horror tickled Quinn. Perhaps it was slightly sadistic to find amusement in her mother's distress, but she wasn't going to lose any sleep over it. She had been slightly worried at first, but had told herself that she probably could've gotten away with it for weeks before her mom would've noticed. Typically so, her mom just so happened to want to hang-out the day she did it.

"Yes," Quinn softly laughed out, "it is pink." She ran her hands through it, not used to her hair feeling so light.

"Quinn," Judy had a serious tone about her as she took her very unimpressed mother stance, hands on hips and everything, "are you on drugs? Do I need to send you to rehab?"

Now that really got Quinn, she laughed again. "No, mom, I am not on drugs. I'm just trying something out."

Judy scrutinised Quinn, taking in her daughter's change in demeanour as well as look. "Okay." There was an awkward pause as Judy stared. "I think I could grow to like it."

"It's not permanent, so don't worry if you don't." Quinn rolled her eyes when her mom let out a sigh of relief.

"Phew, now I know you've had a rough time Quinn," Quinn's eyes narrowed, her mom should know, she didn't exactly help. "You really had me worried there." Judy laughed uncomfortably.

"Now I wouldn't want to go and do that now, would I?" Quinn gritted out.

Judy either ignored her tone or didn't pick up on it, "So what do you say, fancy going out for dinner?"

Quinn was feeling kind of hungry. "Yeah, sure."

When Judy didn't go to move and sort of just stood there with a nervous look on her face, Quinn could've screamed. Her mom was such a wet wipe.

"I'll wear a hat."

Judy's relief was palpable, "Thank you dear, you know how the ladies are and Clara works at Breadstix now. She'll run straight to her mother and tell her you've turned into a lesbian!" She let out an incredulous chuckle at the thought. "I wouldn't hear the end of it! Meet me in the car in ten, sweetie." She kicked at the pile of clothes she dropped. "Oh, and bring these down if you would."

Quinn's heart had well and truly dropped out of her ass at her mom's comment. Her stubbornness soon righted her though, if other people thinking her daughter was gay was going to give her mom grief, so be it. Quinn grabbed the beanie on her dresser and tossed it under her bed.

_Whoops. Looks like I've lost it._

She took the stairs with pep in her step and a self-satisfied smirk on her face. Her mom gave her a questioning look, to which Quinn replied with a shrug. "Can't find it anywhere," Quinn feigned caring, inwardly giddy at the idea that people were going to see this Quinn. What would they say? What would they think?

Instead of the dread that questioning herself usually brought, this time she was excited to embrace it.

...

Quinn had texted her that morning that she wasn't going to need a ride and that she should go without her. That was fine with her, it's not like she'd want to share a car with Quinn and Lucia today anyway.

"Where's your girlfriend?"

"Why don't you shut up?" Santana growled.

Lucia rolled her eyes. "Fine!" For all of five seconds she was quiet. "I don't get it, San."

"You're worse than Berry! Just drop it, okay." Santana gripped the steering wheel in frustration. "I don't need you getting into my shit."

"Mom would be okay with it." Lucia spoke softly, she could see she was upsetting her sister, but she saw it as her sisterly duty to do what was best for her.

"Drop it." Santana snapped.

Other than the tinny murmur of the radio that was on low, the rest of the drive was made in dead silence.

When they pulled into the school parking lot Santana sat there as she waited for Lucia to get out. Her sister had other plans.

"I just think that you need to stop being so scared to live your life." Lucia's voice was quiet but steady. "I don't think you realise how much you're hurting yourself by not accepting yourself."

"I accept myself."

"If you did you wouldn't hide yourself."

"Why can't I do both?" Santana continued to look ahead out of the windshield.

"You shouldn't be ashamed of who you are." Lucia's voice came out stronger this time. "And goddamn, you're a Lopez. If anyone fucks with you, I'll beat their ass." Lucia made a show of punching the air, ducking and weaving invisible punches.

Santana could see her out of the corner of her eye and bit down on her lip to stop herself from laughing.

Seeing this Lucia felt a surge of pride for getting her miserable sister to stop being so grumpy. It was a triumph only she could really appreciate.

"C'mon, tough guy. Put 'em up." Lucia was addressing her sister, still with her fists raised.

Santana was looking at her now, still chewing on her lip to tame her smile. Her sister was ridiculous. How was she related to such a dork?

"Kid, you don't know who you're messing with."

Lucia punched Santana in her arm, not with all her might, but hard enough to have Santana yelping.

"Ow! That actually hurt." Santana rubbed her arm.

"Pussy." Lucia narrowed her eyes in challenge, still bobbing up and down like she was in _Street Fighter_.

"Oh my god."

"What?" Lucia was suspicious at her sister's sudden change in tone. "Are you tricking me?" When Santana didn't respond and only gaped at whatever she was seeing, Lucia's innate need to be nosy got the better of her. "If this is a trick you're so dead." She turned to look out the window and felt her own jaw hit the floor.

"Is that Quinn?" Lucia squished her face closer to the window.

"Move your fat head!" Santana shoved Lucia out of the way and scooted forwards herself. Unless Quinn really did have a twin, that was Quinn with pink hair and looking like a Skank reject. The more Santana stared, the more she found it kind of hot. She tilted her head as she admired Quinn's change in wardrobe.

"She looks like she smells funky."

"Lucia!" Santana didn't mean to laugh, she really didn't. "She looks hot."

"You would say that." They watched as Quinn strode into school, not a care in the world by the looks of things.

"What do you think of this." Lucia clapped her hands as she turned in her seat to look back at her sister. "I join Glee and I help you-" Santana immediately shook her head.

"No."

"But!"

"I said no."

"You can't stop me."

"I'll break your legs."

"I'd just run away before you could do it, and you wouldn't be able to catch me with those short things." Lucia poked Santana's thigh.

"I don't need your help. I'm a catch." Santana flipped her hair over her shoulder and made a show of batting her eyelashes.

Lucia had a smug look on her face. "So you're actually going to go for it?"

That quickly deflated Santana. "I'm not making any promises. But you just have to leave me alone with this, okay?"

"Jeez, okay." She grabbed the handle of the car door and was already on her way out when she turned back. "I'm proud of you."

Santana was touched, she gave her sister a half smile and a wave as Lucia slammed the door shut. Wincing at the sound, she began collecting her own bag.

How many times did she have to tell her not to do that?

Lucia shot a cheeky smirk over her shoulder and set a steady jog toward the school entrance, blowing a kiss when she saw her sister's annoyed glare. Santana gave her the bird in kind.

...

Quinn had decided not to go with Santana that morning because she wasn't sure she was going to be ready to leave in time. She had been piecing together an outfit that was more grunge than the summer dresses she was used to sporting. Her mind wasn't made up on whether she liked it or not, but it was new and thrilling to have aesthetically altered so much.

Arriving at McKinley she channelled her queen bee confidence and promised herself to not give a shit. Fake it 'til you make it. A mantra Quinn had repeated to herself on many occasion. Acting aloof wasn't so much a challenge for Quinn as it was to not be hurt by snide remarks, but she was going to revel in the stares and show them all that this is who she was now. She wasn't bound by the expectations they had of her, she had to keep reminding herself.

Standing at her locker she took her time taking things out as she waited for Santana to show. She heard a low and long whistle that was obviously aimed at her.

"What have you come as?"

"Fuck off, Puck."

"No, seriously. What is going on here?" Puck eyed her and pointed to her clothes, as he leisurely leaned on the locker besides hers.

"Why don't you leave me alone?" Quinn clenched the book she held in her hand and slammed her locker door shut. If he wanted a scene, he could have one.

"Dude, you're so embarrassing, I'm just making conversation." He had that dumb smile on his face that he thought made him look charming. Barf. She could tell that he was enjoying winding her up.

Quinn worked her jaw and tried to breathe. "I'm not interested."

"Not just me you're no longer interested in by the looks of things." He wiggled his eyebrows at her before glancing behind her and winking at whoever he had caught sight of.

"What are you even talking about?" Quinn's brow furrowed.

"Quinn, you okay?" She heard Santana's voice just before she felt her hand on her back.

Puck made to move. "See ya later," then under his breath, "dyke."

Quinn could feel Santana clench tightly at the back of her shirt. She felt her heart thudding in her chest, a mixture of shame, sadness and, most strongly, defiance stirred within her. Screw that asshole.

Santana had yet to let go of her so Quinn turned to look at her, the pained expression on her face made her heart ache.

"Don't listen to him." Quinn whispered.

Santana came out of her distracted state and gave a forced laugh, "I should be saying that to you." She let go and smoothed the spot on Quinn's back. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, don't worry about me."

"You sure?" Santana reached up and twirled a piece of Quinn's hair around her finger. "Cause this screams cry for help." Santana's eyes had their sparkle back as she teased Quinn.

"Yes, you jerk." But Quinn didn't push her away like she normally would've. "Thought I'd try something out."

"You should've told me, I could've helped." She dropped her hand and got a better look of Quinn's overall change in appearance. "Not bad. I kind of liked your preppy look though."

"Did you actually? I thought it was a little too conservative for your tastes."

"Hmm, maybe." Santana took her all in, slowly trailing her eyes up and down Quinn's body. "I think I can dig it."

"Well thank you for your input, but I don't care if you 'dig it'." Quinn moved past Santana and bumped her with her hip as she went.

"Oo, she has an attitude too." Santana linked with Quinn as they walked. "Actually, you've always been a bitch."

"You know it." Quinn flashed her a grin.

"And I love it." Santana's smile matched her own. "I've been meaning to ask you something."

"Uh-oh. Been thinking again? Don't exert yourself, babe."

"Oh you think you're so funny, don't you?" Quinn couldn't help the smile she cracked. "I see that smug look." Santana squeezed one of Quinn's cheeks, making Quinn reel her head back and whine in protest. "Thought so."

"I thought you loved it?"

"Hush. I need your opinion." She pouted.

Santana endlessly entertained Quinn, she was such a baby sometimes and it endeared her like nothing else.

"Hit me."

"Right, okay. So I was thinking, I've been super bored and want to take up something else in place of cheerleading. What better than to ask Zizes if she'll get me on to the wrestling team?"

"Are you kidding?"

"No!" Santana was seriously considering this. Quinn wondered if she'd lost her mind.

"Santana, my dear, sweet Santana." They had arrived at their class and took their seat next to each other. "You'll be eaten alive."

"Don't be dumb, Quinn. I won't have to fight Zizes, we're definitely not in the same weight category."

"What and you think you can fight one of the boys? There are no other girls on the team, San."

"Obviously I can beat one of the boys, I'm pretty sure Jewfro is on it and I could take him easy."

"Alright, Mike Tyson. You really want to be up close and personal with that?"

Santana didn't respond straight away, she may not have thought about that. Quinn sat there, trying to ignore the blatant stares she got off of some of her classmates. Most didn't seem to care too much, but the odd few were catching flies.

"I suppose not." Santana rested her head on the palm of her hand. "Maybe Britt will let me go with her to her dance classes."

Quinn didn't mean to react the way she did, but she couldn't help the stir of jealously she felt. "That's not a good idea."

Santana gave her a puzzled look. "Why's that?"

"I couldn't help but overhear, if you're looking to go to dance classes you can come to mine… with me." Rachel interrupted and Santana jumped in her seat. "It would be a wonderful opportunity for us to bond, Santana. Despite the tumultuous relationship we have had, I do appreciate your talents and-" Quinn watched Santana listen to Rachel ramble on. Santana, as far as she was aware, had never been in love with Rachel.

_Interesting._

The more Rachel went on about the pros and cons of such an arrangement, she couldn't help but thank her lucky stars.

"She'd love to." Rachel was taken aback by Quinn reclaiming her own conversation.

"Oh, Quinn!" Rachel seemed quite shocked. "You're looking a little different today."

"Thanks. Anyway, Santana would love to go to your lessons with you. She's told me before how she has always looked up to you."

"Quinn!" Santana gripped her forearm. "Berry, no offense, but it's not happening."

Rachel looked put out by what Santana had said.

Dramatic as ever, she forlornly tucked her hair behind her ear and kind of just... stood there. "Oh well, I just thought it'd be nice. But of course you wouldn't want to." She bowed her head and made a good show of being disappointed. Quinn was impressed.

"Ugh, fine! Jesus, I'll come. But listen to me carefully, it'll happen only once. And once only. This is not becoming a thing." Who knew Santana was such a softie? The thought made Quinn smile.

Rachel actually squealed and squeezed a very reluctant Santana into a hug. "Oh my goodness, this is going to be so much fun. I can hardly contain myself."

Santana patted Rachel's back, "Please do."

When she went back to her own seat, Santana spun harshly toward Quinn. "Why'd you do that to me? Oh god, I'm actually going to be hanging out with Rachel Berry outside of school." She slapped her hands over her face. "I can't believe it. The day has finally come, I am now a loser."

"Get a grip. You're fine." She pulled at the other girl's hands, she gave Rachel a run for her money in the drama department. "It'll be fun."

"Don't lie to me. This is devastating." Quinn rolled her eyes at her.

"Better than getting your ass beat by Jacob."

Santana gasped. "I would not have gotten my ass beaten by that dweeb."

"Keep telling yourself that."

"I'm not speaking to you anymore, Pinkie."

"Oh, how will I ever go on?" Quinn put a hand to her forehead and pretended to faint onto her desk.

Santana didn't say anything, she just took Quinn's hand and drew a sad face with her pen.

Quinn took the pen off her once she was done and returned the gesture, but instead of a sad face she drew a heart.

The kiss she gave the heart was more of an afterthought than anything else. And it was the dimpled smile she got in return that made her wish she could do it all the more.

...

It must've been hell. It was hot, it was humid and it had Rachel Berry in it.

Santana had arranged to go with Rachel to one of her contemporary dance classes and it just so happened to be when the AC was broken in the studio.

"Come on Santana, keep going. Surely you've been through worse." Rachel was literally dripping sweat onto the floor as she spoke. _Gross._

"I can't do it. I think I have heat stroke." Rachel was having none of it, she pulled Santana back to the group in her class and they went through the moves once again.

"To think, we'll be the best dancers in the club if we keep this up."

"Second best, but sure."

When the class came to an end Rachel asked if she wanted to go get a drink and duh, of course she did. They pulled up outside of a coffee place and Santana could've hit herself for being so naive. Of course it was coffee.

"I'll get them, what would you like?"

"Something creamy and sweet. And I know, I know, I'm sweet enough. But girl, I am in needs of some sugar."

Santana sat in one of the plush leather seats that were in the corner of the shop near the window hoping that most of her sweat had dried up. Leaving a snail trail on the chair was not on her to-do list.

"Here you go, enjoy." Rachel plopped herself down on the chair opposite her and placed their cups on the small coffee table in between them.

"Thanks." Santana then took three sachets of sugar and poured them straight into her drink. Rachel watched on in horror and disgust, judging Santana's choices. "What? I have a sweet tooth."

"You'll have no teeth all together if you keep that up." Rachel picked up her drink and blew on it to occupy the silence. They'd never really hung out together before.

"So you and Finn back together yet?" Small talk chit-chat was not Santana's forte, but surely Rachel knew this by now.

"Santana, that is really quite rude of you."

"What, I'm just being real with you."

"To answer your question, no I am not, thank you very much."

"Good. Boys are gross anyway."

"Interesting you say that." Rachel pursed her lips in contemplation. "Are you and Noah still seeing each other?"

"God no. I'd rather fuck his mom." Santana shivered at the thought. That woman was scary.

"Do you have to use such language?"

"Mom? Rach, not all of us are blessed with two dads, I'm sorry."

"Not funny." Rachel seemed a little upset by the joke. Santana mentally chastised herself for being insensitive, especially after all the shit she got for having two dads already. And her birth mom? Yikes.

"Okay, I am actually sorry." Santana put her hands up in a placating motion.

Rachel was surprised by the apology, it wasn't like it was a common thing coming from Santana. She'd take it, but she wouldn't say it was okay.

"It's nice that you and Quinn are friends again, it's good to see you in lighter spirits after, you know."

"After?" Santana knew that a lot of the club knew about her and Brittany, but she wasn't close with Rachel like that. She wasn't close with many people like that.

"It doesn't matter. I just really enjoyed today. Hopefully the AC is working next time... if there is a next time?" Rachel had a hopeful look in her eye that had Santana squirming in her seat. If she was being truthful, she enjoyed herself too.

Nodding her head she took a long sip of her drink. She could almost feel her teeth rotting right there and then. _Perfect._

"We're going to be great friends, I just know it."

"Okay, hobbit. Cheers to that." She held her cup out to Rachel to toast to their new friendship.

...

A few days had passed and Quinn was taking not caring to the next level. She had been introduced to the Skanks when she decided to skip out on one of her classes, they were under the bleachers smoking and lounging around. They'd invited Quinn to join them and she thought to herself, why not? This is what new Quinn was about. New things.

She'd cut class a few more times in the week, being sure to not do it too much in case she brought too much attention to herself. Kind of ironic really, considering.

Santana would scrunch her nose up at her when she'd smell smoke on her and she'd tell her it was gross. But she laughed it off and kept doing it anyway.

On the weekend, when the house was empty, she invited Santana and the girls over for a sleepover and drinks. She had no qualms with stealing her mom's stash, if she noticed she'd tell her she didn't know what she was talking about and that would be that.

Her phone buzzed in her pocket.

_Can i come over?_

It was Santana.

_Yh, just come in_

_Okay, c u in a sec_

_I'm in my room btw_

Quinn pulled the plaid shirt she was sure used to be Finn's on and put on her old Cheerio shorts. Sleepovers were a pjs only event. It was a dress code she could happily abide by. She looked at herself in the mirror and tried to pull her hair up and watched as it fell back around her face. Her face was bare, too bare she thought as she picked up her cherry lip balm and applied it to her lips. She wondered if Santana liked cherry.

"You decent?" She hadn't heard Santana come in.

"Yeah."

The door slowly opened as Santana poked her head around, smiling when she spotted Quinn standing by her dresser.

She caught her eyes trailing over her legs before flicking her eyes back up to her own.

"Nice shorts, Q."

Quinn took her turn to get a look at Santana, who was in loose bottoms and an old shirt that must've been one of her mom's. She was as dressed down as she could get, and she was still unbelievably gorgeous.

Santana slowly made her way over to where Quinn was standing, when she got close enough Quinn reached out for her.

"You look cute." She pulled at the hem of Santana's top.

Santana scoffed. "Whatever."

"What? You do." The sincerity in her voice must've surprised Santana as she stared back at Quinn without a word.

The intensity of the look sucked Quinn right into the small space between them. She couldn't tell what Santana was looking for as she looked deeply into her eyes, and she couldn't really focus on figuring it out. Not when she could smell the other girl's perfume and could make out the smudges from the mascara she had worn earlier in the day.

When Santana let out a slow ragged breath and let her eyes linger on Quinn's mouth, Quinn felt her heart drop into her stomach. The hot flash of warmth that she felt inside of her made her ache to move. Almost imperceptibly, Quinn dipped her head down and tightened her grip on Santana's top.

She could feel Santana's breath gliding across her mouth, the anticipation was killing her. The last time they were in this position she had the confidence that came with being inebriated and at a party where everybody was in the same state, she felt vulnerable in the quiet of her room, oh so painfully sober and aware of what was happening.

Santana brought her hand up and gently touched Quinn's hair. "It's fading a little."

Quinn let out an amused breath of air. She was too tightly wound to properly laugh.

Then Santana's mouth was on hers and it took whatever breath she had left away.

It didn't take long for Quinn to reciprocate.

Pushing Quinn back into her dresser, Santana soon took the lead. Quinn braced herself, knocking her moisturizers and sprays onto the floor as she lifted herself onto the dresser. She was not without help, as soon as she strained to push herself up, Santana gripped either thigh and lifted her with ease. It freed Quinn's hands to cup Santana's face as she deepened their kiss.

When she broke free to take a breath, Santana latched her mouth onto her neck. The moan she let out was almost obscene. She felt herself rock forward as she moved one of her hands to hold the back of the other girl's neck. Using the other, she tilted Santana's head back so she could recapture her lips with her own.

Whatever was left on her dresser slowly rattled off to the ground as she continued rocking into Santana's body, pressed close between her legs.

She could feel Santana fiddling with the buttons of her shirt, so she decided to undo them herself. She never was the patient type.

It fell loose and she shook it off her shoulders. As soon as it fell off completely Santana pulled back to look at her bare chest.

"God," came the strangled whisper from the other girl. She looked up into Quinn's eyes again, her face flushed and eyes even more hooded than usual. Quinn couldn't stop her own from drifting back to Santana's now swollen lips.

The rattle of the bedroom door handle alerted the girls to someone coming in. Quinn, on reflex, jumped down off the dresser, bumping into Santana as she did. If she wasn't set on hiding she would have had a better chance to enjoy the feeling of Santana's hands on her body.

"Quinn?" It was Mercedes.

Quinn rushed to her bathroom and slammed the door behind her.

She could hear Mercedes through the door. "Oh, Santana! Hey. Is Quinn up here? She told me to come straight up."

"She's in the bathroom. She'll be out in a sec." Santana's voice was deeper than she was used to hearing, it reminded her of how she sounded when she'd just woken up.

Quinn was still yet to calm down and she realised she hadn't brought her top with her. _Fuck._

Poking her head around the door she called out, "Hey San, can you pass me my shirt? Erm, this one's dirty." Mercedes didn't bat an eye and hopped on to Quinn's bed.

Santana hustled on over to the bathroom with the shirt in hand. "Here you go."

When their hands brushed each other's they halted their movements. "Thanks." She whispered.

The other girl's mouth opened to say something, but instead she just nodded and walked over to join Mercedes on the bed.

Quinn slowly closed the bathroom door and slipped the shirt back on. Splashing cold water on her face she did her best to collect herself.

Tonight would be interesting.


	8. Slumber (Emphasis On) Party

"I think Tina and Britt are coming together, they seem to hang out a lot these days." Mercedes mentioned as she got herself comfortable on the bed.

Santana made a distracted sound of acknowledgement. Her mind was still with Quinn. How long was she going to take?

"I also heard through the grapevine that you and Rachel are taking dance classes together. Now that is hilarious."

"Don't get me started. I could've died. It was so hot in that studio, I'm sweating just thinking about it. I think I'm traumatised by the whole experience."

"So you're not keeping it up?"

"I didn't say that." Mercedes inwardly rolled her eyes at Santana's dramatics. She supposed it wouldn't hurt if Berry and Satan were actually friends, they were quite similar if she thought about it. A thought it would remain too. She didn't think she'd make it through the night if she shared her opinions on the matter with Santana.

Quinn made her reappearance, looking as fresh faced as ever, "Do you guys wanna head down? I think the others will be here soon." Both girls nodded and made to leave.

Before they left Santana caught sight of something very familiar looking. She couldn't make it out exactly with it being on the bedside table but once Mercedes had gotten up she climbed across the bed and snatched it up.

It was the drawing she did of Quinn. The sight of it made her laugh and had Quinn coming to take it off of her like a mother coming to tell off their misbehaving toddler. Santana relented and held it to her chest.

"What did I say, Q? It's got to have pride of place." She placed her hand on the wall above the bed.

"I don't think so. I obviously forgot to toss it out." Quinn pretended to be serious and gave Santana a stern look.

"Ah-ah." Santana wagged her finger at the other girl as she slipped off the bed and rooted through Quinn's belongings. "Where'd you keep your sticky-sticky?"

"My 'sticky-sticky'? What are you even saying right now?" Quinn slapped her hands from messing anymore of her things up. "Leave my things alone."

"But Quinn." Santana whined. "I spent a lot of time on this piece of art! It's a Lopez original. This could make you a mint one day." Santana held the drawing like it was a precious piece of fine art and pouted at Quinn.

Santana knew she was a pain in Quinn's ass and she would say she was the best pain in the ass anyone could ask for. Being such was quite like her drawing. Y'know, a fine art of sorts.

"You make me sick, do you know that?" Quinn took the paper off of her and stuck it up as requested. She tried to act all tough, but Santana could tell she wanted to crack a smile.

"Happy?" Quinn asked from where she knelt at the head of her bed.

"Very."

Mercedes shook her head at the whole thing. She stepped up to have a closer look at the picture. "Wow, Quinn. Your head is huge."

...

Everyone had arrived and were all well on their way to messy. Quinn had never witnessed the Rachel she was currently witnessing.

They were playing truth or dare and she had dared Rachel to give Santana a lap dance. Santana had glared at her, but that was a given, Berry was the surprise. She had hopped up, swaying slightly when she got to her feet, and sauntered her way over to a wide-eyed Santana.

Before reaching the other girl Rachel asked for some music and when it came on she returned her full attention to the one person in the room who wanted it the least. She slowly began to get into the beat, pointing at Santana and winking as she closed the remaining distance.

The other girls were stuck between hysterics and disbelief, it was a sight they thought they'd never see.

Any grace Rachel had managed to poise before reaching Santana left her all together as she plonked herself down on the other girl's lap. To her credit, she fell on beat.

"Hey, bestie." Rachel had her hands around Santana's neck and was batting her ridiculously long eyelashes.

Quinn caught Mercedes' eye as the other girl raised her eyebrow. Quinn responded with her own eyebrows raised and a shrug. She took a healthy swig of her very strong concoction. Cheers, Judy.

Santana only laughed and placed her hands on Rachel's waist. "Not much dancing on this lap, Berry."

"Say it ain't so!" Rachel bounced slightly in her spot. "See, I'm dancing."

Santana squinted her eyes at her and let out an amused hum of disbelief. "You're not fooling me. Let me show you how it's done."

Before Rachel knew what was happening she was essentially pushed off of Santana and onto the floor. She was still holding onto the other girls neck as she went, pulling her down with her.

The other girls laughed at the sight, Santana was sprawled out on top of Rachel, laughing so hard she couldn't move.

Rachel was right there with her, every time she laughed her body shook Santana and set the other girl off even more.

Quinn sat back, a smile fixed on her face, she liked seeing her friends having a good time. Having the girls around was fun, she'd never had them all around like this before. She supposed she'd never really had the opportunity up until her dad moved out and her mom took up 'tennis' in the evenings. That's what she called him anyway, she didn't know who she thought she was fooling with that one. Judy could keep Tennis to herself. Quinn didn't fancy meeting her mom's new man anytime soon, thanks.

She felt somebody sit next to her on the floor. Turning her head toward the warm body she saw it was Brittany.

Her cheeks were flushed pink and she had an impish grin on her face.

"Hey." Brittany had gotten close to Quinn's face and motioned for her to turn her head back so she could whisper in her ear. "I spoke to Taylor the other day." Her breath was hot and wet against her skin.

Quinn was still, her mind was hazy with the alcohol but she still understand completely. She turned to look at Brittany. Her grin was still there and so was something else.

"I knew you liked girls."

The hot and wet feeling was on her mouth now. Brittany's face still close to her own. The other blonde's eyes quickly flicked to two girls who were now giggling over something else.

The moment felt heavy out of nowhere and Quinn didn't know how to feel when Brittany's gaze came to meet her own. Brittany pecked her on her mouth and it was so quick she could've sworn it didn't happen.

"I've got you, babe." Then suddenly the warmth of their closeness was gone and Brittany was clapping her hands to get the others' attention. "Ladies! May I have the floor?"

Tina began whooping, Sugar copying as soon as she started.

"I suggest we play a little game." Brittany's attempt at being subtle was admirable despite being poor, waggling her eyebrows in Quinn's direction before nodding to Santana. "I think spin the bottle will bring us all closer together." She squeezed Quinn to her left, then moved to squeeze Mercedes on her right.

"Yeah!" Rachel shouted from her position on the floor. She was flat on her back with her legs on Santana. "Team bonding." She looked up at Santana and when she get a nod from the other girl it only solidified for her that this was a great idea.

"You're all hot and everything, but I only kiss boys." Sugar declared.

"Boo!" Brittany hollered. When Sugar pulled a face Brittany gave a reassuring smile. "You can just peck them on the cheek, or just drink!" With that she knocked back the rest of the drink she had. "Refills first."

"I'm with you on that." Mercedes began to stand and held her hand out for the other girl. Both of them making their way to the kitchen where they'd left all the booze. Tina and Lauren soon followed them after finishing off their drinks too.

Quinn nursed her own drink a bit more as she watched Santana talk with Rachel. The other girl looked at her then. Her dark eyes making the hair on her arms stand on end.

...

Santana pretended to listen to the drunk ramblings of Rachel. She and Quinn had been having a staring contest for a couple of minutes by this point. Neither had looked away and the more she thought about it the more it she found it amusing.

She tilted her head when Quinn did and when Quinn righted her head she did the same. Quinn picked up on it fairly quickly and pinned Santana with a look that was meant to be intimidating.

She shot her a wink and began to push Rachel's legs off of her. The girl on the floor was none the wiser, now invested in giving Sugar singing lessons.

"Okay, Sugar. Let me show you a favourite technique of mi- hick." It would take more than hiccups to deter Rachel Barbra Berry. "... mine."

Santana playfully rolled her eyes and Quinn hid her smirk behind her cup.

"C'mere." Quinn patted the spot next to her. Once she'd sidled up she rested her head on Quinn's shoulder.

"What's that?" She asked as she nodded to the drink in Quinn's hand.

"Want a taste?" The other girl tilted the cup towards her lips. It went down with a grimace, but she took it in stride. That shit was strong and super gross. "Don't like it?"

"I've had better." It was true, she could make a mean cocktail when she wanted to.

"I bet you have." There was a mischievous glint to Quinn's eye and it had Santana smiling before she even knew what for. When Brittany had told them all they were going to play spin the bottle she had been hoping that she'd get to kiss Quinn again, but it seemed it'd be happening before they'd even started if Quinn kept looking at her like that.

"Stop it."

"Stop what?" Quinn bit her lip.

Santana couldn't help her eyes dropping to the other girl's mouth. Quinn played dirty. She should've known this by now. "You know what."

Quinn was fiddling with one of the buttons on her shirt and Santana laughed at how blatant Quinn was with her teasing. She both hated and loved how effective she was at it.

"You'll have to tell me. I'm not sure I understand."

"Berry and Sugar are right there. And those guys will be back soon." She said without much conviction, whilst putting her hand on Quinn's to stop her from doing anything else.

Quinn took a look at the other girls who were now making noises that were questionable in the name of pitch perfection. When she returned her gaze to Santana's it could've knocked her dead right there and then.

"Better make whatever it is you're wanting to do quick then, huh?"

"You're crazy." _And so hot._

Before Quinn could respond Brittany was prancing back into the room, sloshing some of her drink onto the carpet.

"There were no empty bottles so we had to finish one of them off." She wiggled the bottle in her hand and tossed it into the middle of the floor. Rachel screamed thinking it'd smash. When it didn't it quickly became obnoxious laughing.

Quinn's body was right next to hers and it made her insides all jittery and her skin hypersensitive, the cotton of the shirt Quinn had on being a constant reminder of earlier. It was quite distracting.

"I'll go first!" Tina quickly got out. Santana was a little surprised, if not a little impressed too.

Tina's spin landed on her. Of course it landed on her.

"Pucker up, girly." She heard Quinn say beside her. Oh she'd pucker up alright. She was a damn good kisser and Tina was about to find out just how good.

When her lips met Tina's she was pleasantly surprised at how soft they were. She stuck her ass out a little more as she leaned across the circle for Quinn's and everybody else's benefit, naturally. She was hot and she knew it.

And the game proceeded as such. Rachel had enjoyed her kiss with Tina a little too much, she'd have to keep an eye on that one. Sugar gave Mercedes a sloppy kiss on the cheek and they shared a shot. Zizes landing on Brittany was the best, despite her protests Brittany had worked her charm and got a smooch out of the girl and left her laughing like she hadn't seen before. Everyone was in high spirits.

Her face ached with the amount she'd smiled within the last couple of hours.

The one thing that was bugging her was that her own spins had landed on anyone but the one person she wanted it to land on.

Her luck was not about to change.

Her next spin landed on Brittany. _Shit._

As soon as she caught her eye, she saw that a cheeky smile plastered on her face. Brittany crawled across the circle and took her face in her hands. It was like second nature as her long fingers lightly tickled under her ears as she slowly dragged them across her skin. They rested against the back of her neck, where they had so many times before.

Their mouths met and muscle memory guided them. It was so, so familiar, yet so different.

Santana still cared for Brittany, but as they kissed she knew that she didn't want Brittany's mouth on hers the way she wanted Quinn's.

They pulled apart and Brittany looked into her eyes, trying to read her. The whole thing had just reaffirmed what she'd known for a while now. She was into Quinn. Way more than she had thought.

She chanced a glance at her and saw her reach forward for the bottle and spin it with force. More force than necessary.

Quinn's spin landed on her.

"I'm bored! Let's play something else." Sugar whined.

Fuck that. Santana was getting on thems lips.

She looked to Quinn and saw her looking back. The fire in her eyes shot straight through her.

"Sure. But first!" Brittany got up, tripping over her feet as she made her way out the door. "Refills!" The shout could be heard down the hall.

"C'mere." Quinn mouthed.

She grabbed a handful of Quinn's shirt and pulled her forward. Smashing their lips together harder than she intended.

Their kiss was hot, wet and sloppy thanks to the drinks they'd had. You wouldn't catch her complaining though.

It was tunnel-vision from thereon out. She could only focus on Quinn's mouth on hers.

"Guys, the game's over." Sugar said.

Rachel hushed her by pressing her finger against her lips.

...

Brittany could've patted herself on the back. People underestimated her constantly and it sucked. What they didn't know was that she was more clued in that they thought.

Ever since she spied Quinn ogling Santana's perfect ass in the choir room, she had an inkling that Quinn had some lady loving potential. It may have stirred the green eyed monster inside of her at the time, but she wasn't going to get in the way of Santana getting another shot at being her authentic, Lebanese self.

The kicker was when Taylor had called her up a couple days after her party and spilled the dirty details on what had gone down when she'd gone to powder her nose. It was only later that evening over a bowl of Lucky Charms did she realise that they had been getting it on in her bed. The revelation of Quinn's sweet lady kissing activities put a pin in any outright annoyance, but she reminded herself to tell Taylor to keep her business out of her bed in future.

The sleepover was the perfect opportunity to play Cupid. The bright idea to play spin the bottle hit her when she felt the disappointing weight of her cup. Some may call it a win-win situation. She could finish a bottle off and Quinn could get her lips on Sanny's.

Brittany had to admit that the possibility she'd get to kiss Santana again excited her, an added extra of sorts. Don't get her wrong, she didn't want to cheat on Artie, it was just the name of the game. Sure, it may have fed some selfish part of her that wanted to be Santana's one and only, she wouldn't lie to herself and say it didn't. And yeah, her body still reacted to those sweet lips on hers, but the lack of reciprocation told her everything she needed to know.

Santana was into Quinn too. And more than some little crush.

When she sat back on her haunches the glare she received from Quinn tickled her. Yes, of course she and Quinn were on the mend and she didn't intentionally try to wind her up, it was just a little bonus when she did. And anyway, she had totally wing-manned the shit out of the night.

Quinn's blush as her turn landed on Santana had her feeling all giddy and accomplished. Her job was done and she was nowhere near drunk enough to watch Santana and Quinn make-out and dry hump on a pile of pillows. _Actually…_ _No, Brittany. Just no._

At Sugar's suggestion she escaped to the kitchen as fast as her feet could carry her. She was soon joined by the rabble. Mercedes gave her a knowing look as she entered and it peeved her for some reason. She didn't want pity if that's what she was going for. But then the other girl gave her a wink and tapped her nose. Brittany's smile could've lit up the room.

She had a partner in crime. Oh how fun!

She let out a laugh and tipped tequila into her mouth. "Down with the cup!" She smacked a plastic cup off the counter thinking it was empty. The clear contents inside spilled all over the floor.

Rachel screamed for the second time that night and tried to run from the splash and resulting puddle, her efforts were poor as she slipped around until she finally fell into Lauren's arms.

She'd have to go on vocal rest after tonight Brittany thought. _Score._

Sugar, forever the people pleaser joined her campaign by pushing another cup off the side like Tubbs did to every snow globe Brittany had ever owned. Brittany felt delirious at how funny she found it.

"I declare no more cups! Drink and abandon the way of the cup, join the way of the bottle!" She let out a war cry as the other girls laughed and tried to drink their drinks as fast as they could.

She tipped the tequila back again before stepping back and in front of the others to create space. "Please, my children, come. Come and be quenched of your thirst." Tina carefully made her way over, being careful not to slip. "Open up, buttercup."

You'd have thought Tina was at the dentist as she 'ahh-ed' up at Brittany. She was rewarded with a mouthful of burning liquid.

"Next!" Brittany threw her arms back with too much force and threw herself off balance, sliding on the spilled drinks from earlier. She let out a yelp as she hit the fridge before landing on her ass.

Her eyes were scrunched shut, dreading she'd done the worst.

Slowly opening one of them she checked the wellbeing of what she held in her hand. The others all watched on, unsure on how to react.

When Brittany saw that the bottle was indeed intact and still had a healthy amount left she let out a joyous cheer that soon caught on and had all of the others cheering too.

"To the bottle!" Her cry was drowned out by the chaos that was going on around her. _Awesome._

…

Quinn's head was spinning and it wasn't from the drinks. Kissing Santana was now firmly ranked in the top five things she liked to spend her time doing.

Their kiss had slowed, it was so soft and gentle that she felt an overwhelming rush of warmth run through her.

Santana pulled away and looked at her so intently that her skin prickled with heat. "Thanks."

"Thanks?" If only the ground would have opened up and eaten Quinn alive. Her eyes bugged as Santana gave her a bemused look.

"You're welcome?" _Brilliant, Quinn. Simply brilliant._ Her smile was awkward, the moment felt jilted. Why'd she go and ruin it like everything else? Her confidence from earlier faltered.

The confusion on Santana's face melted into a smirk that didn't help with the embarrassment. A nervous chuckle escaped her as Santana scooted closer.

"You're too cute." Her best friend put a hand on her heart and held her gaze. "It genuinely hurts my heart."

"Shut." Quinn playfully shoved her. "Up." Santana fell back and just lay there.

The silence became noticeable then. Nobody was in the room with them. Then she heard a crash and a cheer, it made her jump. She glanced around the room again as though someone might've seen. Realising that she already knew nobody was there to see her she let out a small laugh.

"Wha's funny?" Santana said from her spot on the floor.

She didn't respond. Instead she lay next to the other girl, pulling one of the many pillows strewn across the floor with her.

"Here." Leaving enough room for Santana she tapped the other side of the pillow for her to share.

"So nice." Shuffling closer she hooked a leg over Quinn's. "So nice." She said again softly, tucking her arms between them as she held onto Quinn's shirt.

Quinn stroked her hair and was content with just looking at the other girl. It was a weird place they were in. Even though she knew she had feelings for Santana that were more than platonic, it was still confusing.

"San?" Quinn whispered as she tried to rouse Santana who had since closed her eyes.

"Hmm?" Her eyes fluttered open.

The question was on the tip of her tongue, it almost burned. The liquid courage coursing through her was enough to topple it over.

"Will you kiss me again when we're sober?" Her hushed voice asked.

Santana slowly blinked up at her. The moment felt so still it was as though time itself had stopped.

Their faces were so close that when Santana leant in and planted a kiss on her lips she didn't see it coming.

"Why don't you ask me in the morning?" It came out more of a rumble than words, but she heard her.

"Let's go to bed."

They bypassed the party that was going on in the kitchen, leaving the other girls to their own devices, and headed straight for Quinn's bed. She'd worry about the inevitable mess tomorrow.

Her bones ached for sleep like they hadn't in a long time. Being with Santana made her feel so good, any time spent with her was time well spent.

She'd remember to ask her tomorrow, she promised herself that she would. She hoped Santana would remember too.


	9. Like-Like You

Wrapped up in Quinn's duvet Santana slowly began to wake up. She chanced a look behind her and saw Quinn sprawled out with hardly any covers. _Oops._ She kicked the duvet out and tossed half over the other girl.

Still snuggled up under the covers, Santana watched Quinn until she started feeling like a grade-A weirdo and turned onto her back to stare at the ceiling.

Last night was on her mind, the ghost of a smile teased to break out as she recalled the games and time spent with her friends. Then she thought of Quinn, their kiss. No. Their kisses. And her question. _The big dork._ It was almost too difficult not to smile at the thought of how assertive Quinn had been until that 'thanks'. The question though. It made her think about what Lucia had said, what she'd told herself, what she wanted for herself. Maybe they could be something.

She turned to face the other girl again when a figurative light bulb lit up in her mind.

Moving as carefully as she could, she rested her weight on her hands and positioned them either side of Quinn's head.

The gentle kiss she planted on Quinn's lips would've put Snow White's piece to shame. Feeling pretty pleased with herself, Santana propped herself back up.

Only Quinn still slept soundly. _Okay._

She kissed Quinn again only to have the same result. _What the fuck?_

This just wasn't on. With a renewed determination only an inexperienced tween would have over a kiss, she tried once more. When Quinn just lay there Santana was genuinely annoyed with herself.

"What the actual fuck?" She whispered harshly.

The tell-tale shakes of held in laughter brought her attention back to Quinn, whose face was failing at feigning sleep any longer.

"Oh, you bitch!" Santana laughed out.

Quinn openly let herself belly laugh at Santana's frustration.

"Quinn, I thought you were dead."

"No you didn't."

"No, I didn't."

They both looked at each other with small smiles on their faces until Quinn got that smug look that Santana used to loathe to see.

"I suppose you've answered my question."

"Hmm." Santana held herself over Quinn again as she came within kissing distance. "Where are your manners this time?" Her smirk told Quinn she was teasing and that she could be smug too. Two could play at this game.

Quinn squinted her eyes in confusion until it hit her and her cheeks burned red. Santana felt a little bit guilty for it, but hey, you can't play dead like that and live to tell the tale without some kind of retribution.

Closing the distance Santana tried to distract Quinn from her embarrassment. Personally, she found it endearing, but she also knew Quinn hated it when she got all flustered.

It seemed to have worked, when she pulled back she saw that Quinn was smiling again. "Thanks."

Then Quinn was up on her own elbows and closing the distance again. Santana was conscious of morning breath, but she was so, so tempted to deepen the kiss this time. When Quinn pulled back and raised her eyebrow at her expectantly she could've rolled her eyes so hard into the back of her head that her brain could've said hi.

"Hey now, manners cost nothing."

"I don't know how you've turned this on me."

"You're welcome." Quinn said in a sing-song voice.

Santana dropped down onto the bed and tucked herself into Quinn. Content with just listening to her heart and feel the rise and fall of her chest.

"San?"

"Hmm?"

"What are we?"

"I don't know." She felt Quinn try to move, but held her firmly. "No, wait." Quinn stopped. "I… I know I like-like you. I mean that's kind of obvious."

"I like-like you too." Even though she could have guessed as much, it gave her butterflies to hear.

They were quiet for a while before Santana broke the silence. "I don't want to be out until I can tell my family."

"Okay."

"But, I don't know when I'll be ready for that. Is that okay?" She knew she had come further than she had with Brittany, but the whole closet-case thing might've been a deal breaker for Quinn too.

"Yeah." Santana physically felt herself relax further into Quinn, it was a relief. "I mean I'm not out either. I'm still not sure what I am if I'm being honest. But if we're in this together I think we'll be alright."

"In this together."

"Always."

They were quiet again and then the thing that used to scare Santana the most came creeping back into her mind. If she was honest, it was a thought she had often, a thought about the future. It was the thought of having a girlfriend, a commitment to somebody who was a girl and not some guy she didn't really give a shit about. To be with somebody who she actually liked, loved. The anxiety over the whole thing churned away in her chest and started to make her feel clammy all of a sudden.

"I know we won't be openly together for a while at least, but…" She bit down on her lip, she so wanted to say what she wanted to say but it was still scary.

"But?"

"Does this mean we're dating?" Santana had wanted it to come out all playful and teasing, but she couldn't muster it when she felt so nervous.

She heard Quinn's breathe hitch and it worried her. Then Quinn started stroking out the knots in her hair and it settled her some.

"Yeah. I guess it does." Came the quiet reply. "Does this feel too fast to you?"

Doubt shot through Santana and it was hard to grapple it when it had controlled her for so long. "Well I'm not going to be seeing anybody else. I don't want to." _Oh fuck._ "Do you?"

Quinn's response was immediate. "God no."

It made her laugh.

"Cool."

"Cool."

…

Weeks had passed with Santana and Quinn spending all of their free time away from school together. Tentative glances in school were shared and casual touches had in the quiet of empty corridors and occasionally in Glee. They were thoroughly smitten and thought they were slick enough for nobody to notice.

Mercedes and Brittany had been beside themselves and would eye each other every time one of them would laugh a little too hard at a comment the other had made or when they'd give each other puppy dog eyes when either of them performed.

They almost found it sickening, but they were happy about it and did their best to keep others out of it. One person in particular had cottoned on pretty quickly and became more of a pain in the ass than usual.

Rachel Berry was firmly in the Quinn and Santana fan club and she was always about three seconds away from making them t-shirts to commemorate their relationship. She was taking this best-friends business with Santana very seriously. If she was being frank (and if you don't mind the language), the fact that Santana hadn't confided in her during one of their numerous dance lesson kind of pissed her off. She had two dads, surely that gave her dibs or something?

"Oh, Santana! I was looking for you?"

"Well you've found me." Santana closed her locker and looked questioningly to Rachel.

"I was thinking we could incorporate our dance class music into Glee club this week."

"No." She began to walk away, how rude!

"Wait!" Rachel caught up easily enough. "It could be fun, disco is timeless."

"Who are you fooling? It is not."

"I beg to differ, ever heard of Diana Ross?" Rachel bit her lip in thought, dare she say it? " _I'm Coming Out?_ "

Santana didn't bat an eye. "Congrats, Berry. Now I have a class to get to, if you don't mind."

"Santana, you know what I mean."

"Yeah and I'm pretty sure that isn't disco."

Santana left her in the corridor as she entered the classroom for her next period.

...

"Hey, Rach." Brittany greeted as she sat besides Rachel on the piano bench she was perched on.

"Hi, Brittany. What do I owe the pleasure?" Rachel smiled.

"Well, Mercedes and I were talking and we wanted to come and tell you to you know, like, mind your business." Brittany said with a polite airiness.

Rachel gaped, puzzled to what Brittany and Mercedes could have been on about. Had they found out that she had been doing stake-outs on weekends to see how much extra training Vocal Adrenaline put into their show choir perfection? Surely that would be beneficial for New Directions!

"Thank you for the advice, but I think my data collecting will be very beneficial in the long-run," Rachel began to pull out the notebook from her bag that had logged the hours Vocal Adrenaline had put in.

Brittany placed a hand over it and shook her head. "No, not that. Although that's insane and I should know, I'm a doctor in psychology according to my fifty dollar certificate from wanna-be-a-doc-dot-com-dot-net." Brittany gave her a concerned look. "No, we want you back off of San and Quinn."

Rachel's face lit up with realisation. "Oh! Oh, I see. Well Brittany, let me assure you that I would never out anybody, ever. It would not only hurt two people who are held dearly in our club, but I'm almost certain my dads would take away all of my Barbra merchandise and put a life ban on my wine-cooler-Wednesday-dinner privileges. And oh my goodness, are they actually a thing then? I totally knew it. I have a gift you see, I am slightly psychic."

"And so is Tubbs, you guys should totally get together some time. You're still broken up with Finn right?"

"Yes, I am. It wasn't meant to be." Rachel dinked one of the keys in front of her and then closed the piano fallboard.

"Nice." Brittany slapped her thighs and stood. "So you going to lay off?"

"Of course, I wouldn't want to jeopardise my friendship with Santana."

"Cool," Brittany began to walk away when a thought hit her, "wanna join our betting pool though?"

Gambling was a tough one for Rachel, she liked certainty and taking risks that were calculated. So the answer was simple.

"Sign me up."

...

"You should have heard Berry earlier," Santana rolled over to where Quinn was reading a book at the head of her bed.

She took her in, her hair had almost faded completely now and was tinged slightly pink. She had toned down the grunge, but hadn't completely reverted back to summer dresses just yet. But Santana had an inkling that the Skanks had a hand in that.

Those bitches.

She didn't understand why Quinn hung out with them, they were gross and a bad influence. Yeah, even she would consider them a bad influence. She hadn't told Quinn this of course, she wasn't her mother for Christ's sake, but it niggled at Santana that Quinn was falling behind and not even trying to look for colleges or think about her future. She tried to play it off when Santana would ask how she did on a test and she'd laugh about how she had blagged it. Or when Santana would mention wanting to go to school in New York Quinn would give her a fake smile before getting all quiet.

It felt too early into whatever their current situation was to argue about a future that felt both too close and far away at the same time. She supposed this was the problem with having a history. She wanted to call Quinn out, so, so bad, but that would be falling into old patterns that always took them down a road of being at each other's necks. And totally not in the sexy way.

_Ugh, what the fuck? Relationships are hard when you actually like the person and care about their feelings._

"What'd she say?" Quinn asked, reaching her hand out to stroke the back of Santana's hand now that it was right by her.

"She wants us to do disco." The disdain dripped from her voice.

"So? Disco's fun." Quinn put her book down and turned fully toward Santana.

"Quinn, you're supposed to be on my side."

"Come on then, why's she all of a sudden wanting to do dreaded disco?"

"I'm going to ignore the sarcasm right there, okay. And because we do it in our dumb dance classes."

_Uh-oh. That look wasn't good._

Quinn had a glint in her eye and fingered at the fabric of Santana's top. "What song?" Oh so innocently put. This girl, man.

Santana narrowed her eyes at the other girl, "I'm not saying."

Quinn pouted. "No? For real?" She continued to run her fingers up and down Santana's arm.

When she didn't budge Quinn got up and grabbed her phone before hooking it up to her speaker. "Okay, but can I play you something?"

"Sure?"

"But," she held up a finger, "you have to show me what you've been learning."

"Oh no, is this going to be-" She was cut off by the opening sounds of _Yes Sir, I Can Boogie_. "You're kidding me."

Quinn's self-satisfied smirk remained as she began to move slowly with the music, her hips falling into the rhythm. She came over to Santana on the bed all coy like and totally not fooling anybody.

Mouthing the opening lines she stood at the bed's edge, Santana looked at her with eyebrows raised. "Come," she put her hand out for the other girl to take.

Santana didn't relent as much as she would've liked to have said she had as Quinn pulled her up and into her personal space. They danced pressed close, the song building along with the palpable tension between them.

Only it was broken when Quinn broke away to demonstrate what Soul Train had taught her.

"Okay, okay. You obviously need the help of a dancing," Santana swayed her hips for exaggerated effect, "professionale." Quinn couldn't keep a straight face as Santana sauntered over to her.

"See, you totally dig disco." Quinn said as she stepped into Santana.

"I totally dig you." Santana put her arms around Quinn's neck and lightly stroked the fine hairs she found there with her fingertips.

"Well aren't you quite the smooth talker."

"The ladies love me."

The way Quinn looked at her just then set her alight. She couldn't do the feeling justice. She stared back into the other girl's eyes, utterly hopeless to them. The pull of her gaze was undeniable. Quinn just had a way to put her in a trance. Santana was forever stuck between wanting to fuck (or be fucked by) Quinn and wanting Quinn to wrap her up and just love her to death.

"You're so hot." Santana murmured.

"Will you help me with something?" Quinn's lips asked. No, wait. Not her lips. Quinn, yeah, Quinn asked.

Santana snapped her attention back to Quinn's eyes, feeling a little flustered all of a sudden.

"Yeah, of course."

…

"Why are we outside of a tattoo place?"

"To buy health insurance," Quinn nudged her and pulled her by her hand, "c'mon, Mack told me this guy is the best."

Santana held firm, stopping Quinn from going inside. "Q, are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Yeah, now come on."

"But are you sure-sure?"

"God, why are you being like this? I would've thought you'd be on board with a bit of rebellion."

"Yeah, normally I would, but not when I know you'll regret whatever it is you're going to get."

Quinn crossed her arms across her chest, she was shivering slightly in the chilly winter evening. Christmas wasn't far off and didn't everybody know it. The population of Lima sure loved their Christmas lights.

"What's your problem?"

"Nothing!" Santana threw her hands up in the air in frustration. "This is dumb and you know it."

"Santana, I'm pretty much an adult, I can make my own decisions you know. I thought it'd be nice to have you come with me, but obviously I was wrong about that."

"Listen I'm here for this phase you're going through, but you've been telling me since fifth grade that you'd get a tattoo over your dead body. And you look pretty alive to me."

"Well I'm not in fifth grade anymore if you haven't noticed."

"Oh, I've noticed." Santana scoffed.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing." Santana lets out a deflated sigh. "I worry about you, Quinn. This just isn't you."

"Are you coming in with me or not?" Quinn held firm, but her mouth twitched with barely held in emotion. She didn't like fighting with Santana, not anymore. To be honest, she never did.

"Q," Santana said softly, "I can't." Her eyes were downcast as she kicked at the pavement.

"This is so stupid, San. Just come in with me." She stepped forward to take Santana's hands in hers, but the other girl just put them in her pockets and shook her head.

"You don't even know what I'm going to get!" Quinn hated this, she felt like she could cry, she was one of those unfortunate people who cried when they were angry or frustrated. And why she was choosing this hill to die on was beyond her. She needed it, didn't she? To listen to herself and what she wanted?

"Okay, what are you going to get?" Santana's voice was resigned, she didn't want to upset Quinn, but she felt it in her gut that this was more than teenage rebellion.

Quinn reached into her pocket and pulled out a scrunched up piece of paper and unfolded it, she took longer than she needed to flatten out the creases to hide the tears building up in her eyes.

She took in a slow, deep breath and held the paper to her chest and looked up into dark brown eyes.

When she turned it over Santana let of a small gasp and immediately wrapped her up in her arms. That was enough to have the tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Oh, Q. I'm sorry." Santana rubbed Quinn's back to comfort her as they hugged.

"It's okay. I know I've been acting kinda different."

Santana let out a soft laugh, "I think our definitions of 'kinda' are very different."

At this Quinn laughed too. "Yeah, maybe."


	10. Take Your Bet

"Do you think that mom would mind me borrowing these?" Lucia asked walking through the door into Santana's room.

Santana pulled a face and eyed the shoes her sister was holding. Hang on a second.

"Those are mine."

"Yeah, true, she won't miss them." Lucia nodded and slipped back out to head to her own room. She was packing for her dad's, the holidays were upon them and it was time to make nice with her second family. Honestly, she didn't mind it too much, it was just weird sometimes.

Shoving the shoes down the side of her suitcase she turned back to her closet to throw a few more things in.

"You're packing?" Her sister's voice came from her door.

"Yeah, that time of year." She knew that Santana missed her when she left for the holidays and she couldn't blame her. Who wouldn't miss her?

Santana didn't say anything more. Lucia looked back to where she was standing, she looked like she was lost in her own head.

"You okay?"

"Hm?" Santana refocused her gaze, shaking herself out of whatever that was. "Yeah, yeah. Erm. Can I talk to you for a sec?"

"We're talking now aren't we?"

"No need to be a dick about it?" Santana frowned at her and took a seat on her bed.

"Jeez, take a joke." Touchy much. "Shoot, girl."

"You know Quinn?"

"Heard of her, yeah." She continued to put things into her case.

"Okay, smartass. Just listen for a second." Santana snapped.

Lucia kept quiet, she didn't want to leave on a fight.

"We're kind of, y'know," Santana was looking at her, waiting for her to pick up on whatever she was on about.

"Y'know?" Lucia scrunched up her face in thought. Had she packed her moisturiser?

"Yeah," Santana let out a breath, "seeing each other."

That caught her attention. She slammed her case shut and span to face her big sister. "Shut up."

"What?" Santana strangled out.

"Shut. Up." Lucia was immediately by her side, squealing as she hugged her. "Oh my God, I think I might cry." She dabbed at her dry cheeks before locking her sister in another hug.

"You're acting like I'm getting married." Santana laughed out, pushing her sister off of her.

"You didn't get her pregnant did you? Should I expect a shotgun wedding soon?" Lucia said, pointing at Santana.

Rolling her eyes, Santana shook her head. "No, I did not."

"How long have you been dating?"

"About a month."

Lucia went slack-jawed. "A fucking month? And you didn't tell me until now!" She stood up and paced the room. "I am so annoyed with you. Is that where you've been this whole time? I thought the house was quieter than usual." She stopped and crossed her arms. "And the fridge a little fuller. But never mind that, I'm happy for you, you'll just have to forgive my sudden urge to punch you in the head right now. I am so pissed off, what the fuck?"

"Tell me how you really feel. I thought you wanted me and Q to be together?"

"Yeah and I said I was happy, dummy. I'm just annoyed you didn't tell me when it happened. I thought we were friends!"

"We are! We haven't told anybody yet." Santana pulled her sister back down to sit with her. "You're the first person I've told. And I've wanted to tell you, I have, I guess I didn't want to jinx it since it's so new and even though you knew I'm a," she paused, feeling the word out on the tip of her tongue, "lesbian. Argh," she covered her face in embarrassment. "I was still scared to say it. I still am. It's so stupid."

"It's not stupid. I mean maybe a little bit, but only because I know you're gay as hell. This is good news though, so what's with the face?"

"I guess I'll just miss you." Lucia had a feeling it might've been more than that, but she gave her sister another hug.

"I'll miss you too. I won't be too long, time will fly by." She tried to reassure.

"Yeah, I guess. I can't believe mom is letting you miss school for this."

"The flights were cheaper this way."

"Still, totally not fair. She would never let me skip."

"Like that ever made a difference."

Santana smirked. "Yeah, suppose."

"Behave yourself, tell Quinn that I'll beat her ass if she hurts you, blah blah blah, and I don't know, like carry my bag down for me? Please?"

Santana stood and patted the top of her suitcase. "Fuck off." With that she left and went back into her own room.

"Lucia!" Her mom called from the bottom of the stairs. "Your auntie is here to take you."

"Be down in a minute!" She hauled her bag off her bed with a huff and dragged it to the top of the stairs. Before she left she popped her head back into Santana's room and saw her yabbering away down the phone. She caught her eye and gestured to her, asking if it was Quinn. When her sister nodded she pointed at her and pretended to cry, then pointed at the phone and punched her palm a few times. Santana just laughed and waved her off. Maybe she thought she was joking, but she'd straight up murder a bitch for her big sister.

"See ya!" She shouted from the front door.

"Bye!" Was the response she got back, then she heard her sister's laughter at something Quinn must've said.

She'd be alright.

…

"Thanks for this, it was starting to look a little janky."

"You said it," Santana said as she applied the blonde dye to Quinn's hair. "Are you going to keep it short?"

"Yeah, maybe for a short while, it's way easier to wash. And I think it's cute."

"It is." She shook the applicator bottle to get the last bit out. "This stuff stinks. I hope you're going to pay me generously for this."

"I'll think about it," Quinn smiled at Santana's reflection in the mirror. They were at her house in her bathroom. She'd had a free house for most of the day with her mom being out with Tennis. At least she was admitting she was dating him now. "Have you thought about Winter Formal? I know that the other guys are going, we could go together." When the other girl frowned she quickly interjected, "It can be a friend date, you know, like going with a friend. But secretly a date-date? Nobody will be any the wiser." She tried not to sound too hopeful.

"I'm not sure, Q. Isn't it kind of risky?"

"Why would it be? It'll be fine."

Santana didn't look convinced. "I'll think about it."

"Okay."

…

Monday's Glee club did little to help Quinn's case. They had been practising some new steps for a routine when they started to mess with each other. Quinn would "accidentally" bump into the back of Santana and she'd be poked in the back in return. They kept upping the ante, thinking the others were too distracted to pay them any notice. It's only when Kurt's harmless "get a room" remark hit them that Santana became cold.

Quinn doubted he even meant anything by it and it was just a joke, like anyone would make, how was he to know it was a great, big, red sore spot? It didn't stop Santana from creating distance and moving into the middle of the group.

Even though she gave Quinn an apologetic look it still stung a bit. Mercedes bumped shoulders with her and pulled her attention for the rest of the routine, she was glad she had a distraction.

"You want to come over soon? My parents are missing you." Mercedes smiled when they had a break in practise.

The comment touched Quinn, Mercedes' parents were so warm and kind to her, when she first met them and saw how they were with their daughter she was genuinely a little awed at how a healthy relationship with your parents could be. "Of course, I'd love to."

"Oh good, now I can tell them to get off my case." Mercedes' mouth quirked with amusement despite the annoyed tone, it made her smile too. Quinn linked her arms with one of Mercedes' and put her head on her shoulder as they stood listening to Mr Schue. "You okay, girl?"

"Yeah," she glanced at Santana, "don't worry about it."

Glee soon came to an end and Santana quickly let Quinn know that she had to get home, she nodded in understanding and gave her hand a light squeeze. She knew Santana must have been panicking, but seeing Rachel chase her down did give her a chuckle.

Before she left herself, she saw Finn lingering near the doorway waiting for her.

As she thought, as soon as she made her way toward him he seemed to be preparing himself for something.

"Hey, Finn. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, you look nice today," he gestured to her the dress she had on. She thought that if she was going to dye her hair back that she'd take up some of her old clothes too. The Skanks had ribbed her at first, but she wasn't too bothered. Her plans were changing and even though she'd given up on her image after quitting Cheerios, she had to admit that she missed some of the benefits. Maybe she'll take a new spin on it. She could still be top bitch and not under Sue's or the Skanks' thumb.

"Oh, thanks." She flattened out the nonexistent creases in her skirt.

"I was thinking," that's dangerous she thought, "since we're both single now and there's a dance coming up that maybe you'd like to go with me?" His dopey smile that once endeared her sat on his face, waiting eagerly for her response.

Quinn tried not to react too wildly, she knew she definitely had no interest, but Finn didn't. "Can I get back to you on that?"

…

"Absolutely not."

"That would be my preferred answer too, but San, if we're keeping up appearances this could work well."

"I'm not fucking having it, Quinn. Just, no."

Quinn had made her way straight to Santana's after her talk with Finn, she'd spent the drive over thinking of the pros and cons of his proposal. Maybe it would work in their favour. Especially after seeing how freaked Santana was over Kurt's comment. It could take some heat off, right?

"San, I don't like him if that's what you're worried about."

"Quinn!" Santana exclaimed, too frustrated to even make a point.

"I don't understand what you want me to do here. It's just a dance."

"You just said you didn't want to go with him, but it sure sounds like you do. Fucking go ahead then. I'm not going to be there." Oh, boy.

"What?" incredulous, "I won't go with him, it's fine. Truly. Why are you so mad about this, it's only Finn?"

"It doesn't matter who it is."

"Why?"

"Because, not to sound like a prehistoric caveman or anything," she looked at Quinn, "you're mine. I don't want to pretend share you or whatever dumb shit you're trying to sell. I don't want that."

Quinn's heart softened at Santana's admission. They had been arguing this whole time standing across from each other in Santana's room. That wasn't any good. She made sure to close the distance between them and sat with Santana on the edge of her bed, holding onto her delicate wrists and rubbing them soothingly with her thumbs.

"Me either." It came out as soft as the skin under hers.

"Good." Santana smiled at her then and turned her gaze back to their hands. She was thumbing over the recent ink she had there, it was healing nicely. "I can't tell you how much I," she didn't finish her sentence. She simply traced Beth's name and sat in silence. When she looked back up into hazel Quinn could see her throat bobbing with held back tears.

_I love you._

"I love you." Quinn felt like her heart was going to beat its way out of her chest.

"You do?" Santana whispered, a few tears falling from her eyes.

"Yes." And she knew it was true.

"I," the other girl started, but couldn't finish as she burst into tears unable to talk.

"Oh no. Don't cry." Quinn held her, worry in her voice.

"I'm not sad." The words came out uneven, but clear all the same. "It's just a lot at the moment."

"Okay. That's okay." She settled herself in the middle of the bed and encouraged Santana to do the same so they could lie together.

After some time Santana finally settled down and pulled Quinn tighter against herself. "I'll go with you. As your date, I mean."

Quinn was pulled out of her own world, shocked by the words. "You don't have to if you don't want to."

"I do, I've got to stop being so scared."

"You don't have to do anything."

"I'm sure, Quinn. And like you say, it's just a dance. No big." Quinn could tell by her voice that she was nervous, hell, she was nervous for her.

"Exactly, we can go together," Quinn shot Santana a sly smirk, "dance together." Santana let out a small laugh. "Everyone will support us you know."

"Maybe not everyone." Puck came to mind, but she wouldn't let that dick determine how this would go.

"The people that matter will and the people who don't won't care, for the most part anyway. We can deal with the rest as it comes. Look at Kurt, he had a rough start but look at him now."

"Do you think he'll bring that guy he's been gushing about? It's revolting the way he goes on and on," Santana had a fond smile despite her words and she couldn't blame her. Kurt had been seeing a guy from another school for a little while now and he hadn't shut up about him since. It was sweet.

"We could always ask. We're in it together, San. If you have any doubts, please just tell me and we can do whatever you like." Quinn placed a hand on the other girl's face and brought her in for a soft kiss.

"Aren't you just the best girlfriend ever?" Santana murmured out between kisses, her tone light and joking.

"Girlfriend?" Quinn leaned back a little.

"Well duh, I'd hope so. What have we been this whole time?" Santana was still smiling at her and it made her feel warm inside, didn't stop her from teasing her though.

"I don't remember you asking me." Quinn slowly ran her fingertips along the skin of Santana's neck, enjoying the slight shiver she felt come over the other girl.

"I'm pretty sure I asked you if we were dating. That counts." She countered.

"I don't know. I think you should make sure." Quinn lightly bit her lip so that she didn't smile too hard, she wanted to keep some allusion of seriousness to her act.

When Santana pulled away and sat up she was confused, had she said something wrong? But then she was being pushed back onto the bed, the air in her lungs escaping her. Santana climbed on top of her, thighs either side of her hips, plump lips back on hers.

She closed her eyes and took all of her in, the taste of her mouth, the smell of her perfume and the feel of her weight on top of her. Quinn felt drunk on Santana.

"You seeing anybody?" The question brushed against her mouth and she decided to keep her eyes closed, knowing they'd be too close to see each other properly anyway.

"Yeah." It came out more breathless than she intended.

"Oh, yeah?" The low, husky tone of Santana's voice shot straight between her legs.

"Yeah."

"Will she mind this?" Her lips were back on hers and she happily accepted them, shaking her head slightly when Santana pulled back.

She opened her eyes then and saw dark brown eyes staring back. "What about this?" Santana's hand snaked down her body and pulled at the bottom of her dress until it was up and over her hips. She torturously grazed her inner-thighs, stroking until Quinn couldn't cope with it anymore. Quinn tried to move her body to get her to touch her where she needed her, but Santana just pulled back.

"Please." She whispered.

That was all it took to have her touching her again, only this time Santana wasn't shy about giving her what she so desperately wanted.

Quinn couldn't help the gasp she let out at the pressure of Santana's hand cupping her, her mind going haywire. Thank God she went back to dresses.

"And this?"

Again she shook her head no, never letting her eyes leave Santana's. She didn't think she could speak if she wanted to. They held their gaze as she felt the other girl's hand move ever so slightly up to the band of her underwear, teasing at it just enough to elicit a verbal response from Quinn.

"Santana, I swear to God-" she didn't get much further before she felt fingers sliding into wet heat. "Oh fu-" she moaned, one hand cupping Santana's jaw, the other on her back, urging her closer, deeper.

Santana set a steady pace, telling Quinn to open her eyes when they fell closed once more and Quinn did. She'd do anything for her. For every pant and moan that escaped her it felt as though Santana translated every one into making her delirious. She tilted her hips upwards and pulled Santana into a heated kiss, wanting to tell her without words what she was doing to her as their rhythm became frantic.

"Up." Quinn got out. Santana didn't need to be told twice as she broke away to pull her shirt over her head, tossing it to the floor without a second glace along with her bra. Her pants didn't last long either. No time to lose.

"Off."

"Help me." Quinn lifted her arms for Santana to pull her dress over her head. And help she did with only a small struggle and a few giggles as the dress put up some resistance. Once it was finally off they took a second to take each other in, basked in the soft glow of the bedside lamp. The warm light being quite the contrast to the darkening sky of winter's early nights.

They shared a soft smile and came together once more. Their movements were slowed by the interruption, their caresses were gentler and more thoughtful, their kisses deeper and lingering.

Lying entwined, one of Santana's thighs fit snugly in-between Quinn's, she slid her fingers back down into Quinn's slick heat, gathering the wetness there before dragging them back up to her clit. Her head was tucked into Quinn's neck and she could feel the other girl's pulse race as she began to move.

Listening to Quinn's moans she kept going, pressing harder ever so slightly when she felt the friction between her own legs begin to increase. Quinn's legs fell open, her pants coming quicker and her nails digging deeper, quicker and quicker still until Santana heard a guttural moan and glanced down to see what she had already felt, her hand trapped between creamy white thighs and her own.

"I love you too." Quinn almost didn't register the words and when she did her eyes opened wide, looking at the flushed face of her girlfriend.

Relaxing her clenched thighs she ran her hand up Santana's back to hold her face, kissing her sweetly before running her hands back down to her ass then thighs to give herself leverage to pull herself up and flip Santana onto her back.

"Thanks."

The evening was spent showing each just how much they loved each other, between sweaty sheets and sweet nothings until Santana's mom came home from work and Quinn thought it best to make herself scarce.

The smile on her face hurt her cheeks as she skipped her way to her car out front. Before she got in she turned back to see Santana waving her goodbye from her window and she lifted her hand in turn. When Santana blew her a kiss she laughed to herself and pretended to catch it. That smile stayed on her face all the way home. Her heart hadn't felt so full in so long.

…

Mercedes, Brittany and Rachel were gathered in the lunch line the next day talking shop. Had Santana and Quinn been closer today? Or were they imagining things?

"Rachel, why are you even in the queue? You know they don't sell anything vegan." Mercedes asked as she held her tray out for more tots.

"It's a ruse, I needed to talk to you two before we all sat together for lunch."

"Well?" Brittany said from her spot behind her.

"Well, I know that you know that I know since our last chat," she tossed a look behind her at Brittany, "that I know about the Santana and Quinn thing. I wanted to thank you in advance for the money I'm about to win, because those two are definitely going to confirm their dating status any day now."

Mercedes stopped in her tracks. "What money?"

"The money from the betting pool?"

"Betting pool? What the hell?"

Rachel whipped around and pinned Brittany with a glare. "Where's my money?"

Brittany stared back unblinking, "I don't remember."

Rachel let out a growl of frustration and stomped off toward the table where the Glee kids usually sat.

"Why'd you tell her?" Mercedes chastised Brittany.

"I don't know, I thought it'd make things more interesting. C'mon 'Cedes," she pointed in Rachel's direction, her face scrunched up in annoyance, "I feel bad. Can we include her still?"

Mercedes relented, Brittany's puppy dog look was too much. "Ugh, fine."

...

"What's with the sourpuss, Berry?" Santana asked from her spot next to Quinn from across the table.

"Daylight robbery is what." She crossed her arms and huffed out.

"Do I even want to ask?" Santana rolled her eyes for Quinn's benefit, getting a light laugh out of her.

"No." Mercedes and Brittany came from the food line and took their seats. Rachel made a point to ignore their presence.

"Oo, what'd you get?" Santana leaned over to snatch a tot only to have Mercedes smack her hand away.

"Get your own."

"Will you guys be coming to Winter formal? I heard that Finn asked you, Quinn." Artie interrupted, oblivious to the tension he just created.

Tina, Lauren, Sugar and Kurt all seemed to want to know too, the only people not present being the boys who played football. Beiste had been riding them harder than usual. _Wanky._

"He did," Quinn took a hesitant look at Santana who gave her a slight nod, "and I said no. But, I'm going, I mean we're going. Santana and I. Together."

"Oh that's so nice, you're such good friends," Sugar gushed, Lauren side-eyed her in disbelief.

"Not as friends."

"As in?" Kurt poked.

"Girlfriends." Santana said with confidence she definitely did not feel in the moment, she gripped one of Quinn's hand and gave her a wobbly smile.

"You're gay?" Sugar asked quietly and mostly to herself. When did this happen? She hadn't seen any signs whatsoever, at all, nada, zilch. Except at the sleepover, but like, _oh._ Her eyes widened in realisation.

"Yes!" Rachel clapped her hands together, "Oh my goodness, Santana I'm ecstatic for you I really am."

"Well can you keep the ecstatic to a two-man radius please?"

Rachel put a hand to her mouth. "Oh, yes. Of course." Santana could still make out the smile Rachel was trying to hold in and it was kind of infectious because she was smiling too.

"I'm happy for you, the both of you." Kurt added.

"We're telling you guys because we trust you and you're our friends. We aren't screaming it from the rooftops or anything, but we thought we would share it with you. So, you're welcome." Santana couldn't help adding a bit of snark to what she had to say, but from the faces she saw around her, they appreciated the sentiment.

The revelation injected some life into the table's conversation for the rest of lunch; people asking when and how; Santana getting annoyed with the interrogation; Rachel feeling vindicated and therefore somehow even more talkative than usual; Kurt asking everybody what they were going to wear; so on and so forth. It was a little hectic, manners were out of the window, but so what? Santana had told people she had a girlfriend and they didn't hate her for it, if she wasn't slightly pissed at the leer she caught Artie throwing their way she might've cried or something God-awful like that. This group of weirdos had come a long way together. It was kind of awesome. Don't tell them that, though.

…

Rachel was readjusting her headband in the girls' toilets when Bonnie and Clyde themselves accosted her. "Hello, ladies."

"Listen Rachel, Brittany didn't lie, we were betting and you won," Mercedes pulled out the small wad of bills from her back pocket and held it out for Rachel to take.

"I won? I _won_? I won!" Rachel cackled, that's right, cackled. Brittany shot a concerned look to Mercedes.

"It's a good thing we fessed up, she could've cursed us." Brittany glanced back at Rachel who was still grinning like the cat that got the cream.

"Thank you, ladies. I'll be sure to invest wisely. Now, if you don't mind." Rachel skipped past them without a second look and was out of the door.

"Remind me to never trust you to keep a secret."

"Hey, I'm plenty good at keeping secrets." Mercedes narrowed her eyes at Brittany, but Brittany just gave her a mischievous smirk.

"You're a strange one, Brittany Pierce."

"Thank you." She held her arm out for Mercedes to link. "Now come on, the smell of bathrooms remind me too much of that time I hid in a cubicle at my little cousin's bar mitzvah. One of his pimply friends kept asking if I'd fallen from heaven. It was so weird, cause like, how'd he know? I had to get out of dodge, but my mom was my ride. Total bummer."

"Your family's Jewish?"

"What? No. Why?"

Mercedes took a few slow blinks. "Nevermind."


	11. Is It Cold In Here?

They were really doing this. Holy fuck. She felt sorry for Quinn, her palms were really sweaty, like really sweaty, but she was not letting go any time soon.

Some of the club had pitched in to hire a limo to travel together and all the hot air from a lot of people all close together was not helping matters. If the ride had lasted any longer her make-up would have melted off, she was sure of it. Blaine, Kurt's boo, came to her rescue when he handed her a glass of champagne - a gift from Judy. It might not have helped with the heat, but it sure as hell settled some of her fraught nerves.

When the car pulled to a stop Quinn got out before her and was a real gentlewoman about the whole thing, she held her hand out and everything. Colour her impressed with the chivalry and thankful for the cold air outside.

"You ready?" Quinn asked as she slid her hand around her waist.

"You know me, always ready."

They were interrupted by Rachel's dramatics as she whined about how cold it was, clinging to both Kurt and Blaine. They probably hadn't been betting on being in a thrupple tonight, but Rachel and Finn were definitely not happening again anytime soon and she seemed quite taken with Blaine. So, unluckily for Kurt, here they were. The three musketeers. Speaking of Finn, he'd agreed to do Artie a solid and drive Artie, Brittany, and Puck in a separate car to meet the rest of them when they got there.

"Shall we get inside before one of us dies of hypothermia?" Kurt asked as he pulled Rachel, and therefore Blaine, in the direction of the school's entrance.

Santana and Quinn weren't far behind, Quinn squeezing Santana closer as they reached the door.

"Hey, guys!" The slamming of a car door and Brittany's call stopped them in their tracks. "Wait up!" Brittany came running over, leaving the boys to help Artie out. "Aren't you guys pumped?" Her smile lit up her face.

"Totally," Santana gave a wary side-eye to Quinn, who pinched her hip.

"Yeah, Britt. You look really nice."

"Thanks, Quinn! So do you, you're both looking really hot."

Santana took the time then to really appreciate Quinn's appearance, her hair was pinned up leaving her defined jaw line and neck exposed. She had to hold back a smirk knowing that some carefully applied make-up on a spot there was covering up a hickey. As though reading her mind Quinn gave her a look that told her to stop. She just raised her eyebrows and shrugged, trailing her eyes down the pale blue dress Quinn had on, it was certainly a return to Quinn's old style and she wore it well. When Santana first saw her she couldn't believe how beautiful she looked. Well, she could, because Quinn had always been beautiful, but being together had opened her up to a whole new world of appreciation. Quinn was lightly drawing a pattern on her waist and it distracted her from fully listening to what Brittany was talking about. She could fill her in later. In more ways than one.

"We should get a photo! My mom told me to make sure I got pictures, apparently these are the best years of our lives." Brittany let out an airy laugh. "I sure hope not. But it's a good idea, no? Here I'll get somebody to take it." Brittany asked somebody who was making their way inside and called Kurt and the others to come back to get a group photo. Santana noticed how Quinn tensed as Puck made his way over with Finn and Artie.

"Okay guys, on three. One, two," Santana plastered on her best smile as she was huddled into the group, Mike on one side, Quinn on the other, "three!"

A quick flash and they were falling away from each other eager to get inside once and for all, she noticed that Puck was pulling Quinn aside and it set her on edge until Quinn glanced towards her with a nod. With that she followed the rest of them, lightly punching Finn in the arm and getting a grin out of him. He'd been embarrassed when Quinn had let him down, but he was a good sport about it, he was alright sometimes she supposed.

…

"Make it quick, Puck."

"Fine, fine." He scuffed the tip of his shoe on the pavement and nervously rubbed the back of his head.

Quinn hugged herself against the chill, she was starting to question why she was giving the time of day. "Puck."

"I want to apologise."

Quinn scoffed, "You want to apologise?"

Puck scowled, but as though remembering why he'd wanted to talk with Quinn, fixed his features, "Yeah, I do. Listen, it's gotten weird between us and I don't want it to be like that. We used to like each other, or at least I thought we did and then all of this stuff happened between us and it's gone to shit."

"I wonder why." Quinn muttered.

"Hey, it's not all me you know."

"Fuck you." She spat, pointing at him. "This is _your_ apology, don't come to me and turn it around. I've had every right to be angry with you. We both made a mistake, I can admit to that, but fuck you for using it against me. I don't care if it was a joke to you, it has never," she took a heaving breath as she felt her anger start to bubble up, "never! Been a joke to me."

"Shut up, you're making a scene." A few students who were making their way inside had slowed their stroll to eavesdrop.

Quinn let out a harsh, garbled laugh and stormed inside as Puck quickly followed. She led him to a classroom and slammed the door behind them. "Happy?"

"I know it's not a joke, Quinn! She was my daughter too!" Puck's own emotion was getting the better of him as he kicked at one of the tables.

"Oh, yeah? Then what's with the 'baby momma' shit, you fucking idiot? How would you like a constant reminder that you couldn't keep her?"

"You think I don't have constant reminders? That my mom doesn't talk about her like she's her granddaughter, someday bound to turn up on our doorstep wanting to meet her grandma? Maybe I wanted you to hurt too."

"That doesn't give you the right!" Quinn slammed her hands down on the table opposite Puck. "You don't think I haven't been hurting enough as it is?"

Puck stopped his pacing then and let out a defeated breath. "I know. I know." He sat on the chair closest to him and hung his head as he wiped away a tear that had escaped. "I'm sorry, Quinn."

Quinn didn't know what to say. She felt sorry for him and she hated that she did. She worked her jaw and sat down on the edge of the table. They sat in silence for a moment.

"So you and Santana, huh?" Quinn lifted her gaze to Puck's, he had a faint smile on his face.

Quinn wondered what Santana must have been doing. Probably making fun of Blaine's hair or something else antagonistic because she was worried about why Quinn was taking so long.

It made her smile too, albeit a weak one.

"Yeah."

"I had no idea you were an actual dy- I mean gay girl, erm woman, lesbian. Sorry, dude."

Quinn snort out a genuine laugh. "Dude? Really?"

Puck laughed too as he stood up, "Hey, I'll work on it."

"You better, otherwise you'll have both of us to deal with."

Puck's face told her that he didn't mind the sound of that.

"Ew, no."

He raised his hands in a placating manner. "I didn't say anything."

"I think that's for the best. Shall we go join the others?"

"Yeah, they might think we're making another baby."

Quinn turned around and thumped him in the arm, "I mean it, Noah. Stop it."

"That was making fun of both of us that time." Quinn's glare was answer enough. "Fine, fine. Your wish is my command. No more."

They walked down the hallway with plenty of space between them, "So, we good?" Puck asked.

"For now."

"I guess that will have to do."

"I guess."

Quinn carried on walking but stopped when she realised Puck wasn't walking beside her anymore. She stopped and looked behind her to see him texting on his phone. "Are you coming?"

Puck glanced up and nodded, but started to turn back towards the school exit. "Yeah, I'll see you guys later, just got some stuff to sort out for afters, if you catch my drift." He saluted her and took off with a slow jog out of the door.

She watched him go and was a little relieved she wouldn't have to walk with him the whole way. Their talk had been draining and although not a complete fix, it was probably the best she was going to get out of the situation. They both had their shit to deal with and they would not be working it out together.

…

Where the fuck was Quinn? And why was she taking so long? If Puck had done anything she swore to god that she would hit him where it really hurt then castrate him.

She was getting a cup of punch when Brittany joined her and hooked an arm around her neck and said "Cheese!"

The flash almost blinded her, but she'd managed a smile anyway.

"Where's Quinn?"

"She went to speak with Puck." Brittany pulled a face. "Yeah, that's what I'm thinking too."

"I'm sure it'll be fine."

"We'll see." Santana took a sip of the punch.

"We can dance until she gets here, we're here to have fun after all."

"Sure, Britt." She took the other girl's hand and did just that until she felt somebody tap her shoulder. Quinn stood there with a smile on her face, surely a good sign. "You okay?"

Quinn nodded and then as if by divine intervention the music switched to a slow number, Rachel was singing with Mercedes and they sounded beautiful together. Santana looked over to them on the stage, then looked back to Quinn with a question in her eye. Quinn's smile grew wider as she nodded again, stepping into Santana's space and putting her arms around her waist.

As soon as Quinn laid her hands on her, Santana felt herself warm up despite Quinn's skin still being a little chilly from being outside longer than her. She put her own arms around Quinn's neck and hugged her close, feeling safe in the crowd of students surrounded by their group of friends. It was fairly dark and people were too concerned with themselves to be bothered by two girls dancing together - especially when those two girls were once the top bitches in the joint.

"I know I've already told you this, but you look beautiful tonight." Quinn murmured in her ear.

Santana planted a quick peck on Quinn's neck from where her head was tucked into her shoulder. "So do you. I can't believe we're here."

Quinn tightened her hold, "I know. I'm so proud of you."

"Don't. You'll make me cry and this mascara isn't waterproof."

She felt Quinn's chest vibrate with a low laugh.

"Slow dancing is lot like hugging. It's nice." Quinn said.

"I have never thought of it like that and I never took you for much of a hugger."

"Well I'm not, but I like hugging you."

"You're so mushy." Santana chuckled.

"Shut up. If anybody is mushy out of the two of us it's you."

Santana gasped, "Me? That is such a big fat lie."

Quinn laughed into her ear, "I can't hug you too tight in case I squish you too much, y'know with all that mush."

The other girl leaned back with a goofy smile she couldn't hide. "Whatever."

"Whatever." Quinn mimicked and playfully rolled her eyes, earning a poke in her side. "Don't! It tickles."

"What?" Santana slyly poked her again. "This?"

Quinn tried glaring at her whilst keeping a lid of the laugh she felt bubbling up, "Stop."

"Okay, okay." Santana was still smiling at her, the dimples in her cheeks as defined as ever. She took a deep breath and the smile softened as she brought herself close enough to plant a light kiss on Quinn's lips.

"What was that for?"

"I just wanted to kiss you."

Before Quinn could reply she was distracted by the flash of Brittany's camera, she'd been taking pictures nonstop and had gotten to the point where she had begun taking pictures with random students she probably didn't even know.

Seeing that she'd caught Quinn's attention Brittany's face lit up and she made her way over to them.

"We should get a photo together with us being The Unholy Trinity and all."

"Do you think I could put that on my college applications?" Santana joked.

...

The night had been a success if she did say so herself. It seemed as though Santana had enjoyed herself and so had she. They lay cuddled up in Quinn's bed thinking about the year so far. It was certainly turning out differently than how Quinn had imagined it. For the better, she liked to think, despite the bumps in the road.

"I can't believe your mom is taking you on a cruise over Christmas."

Quinn groaned. "Don't remind me. I told her I didn't want to go but she started crying and it was just too much, so I said that I would. I think that guy she was dating broke it off. She's been a bit touch and go lately. And honestly, I won't hate not being in a big, empty house on Christmas. Maybe I can get a tan."

"You? Tan? You sure about that? I'm pretty sure you get third-degree burns even when it's overcast." Santana joked.

"I do not burn that badly."

"Summer camp disagrees. I used to think you were part snake, all that peeling skin." Santana shuddered for effect.

"Oh my god, don't. That's horrible." Quinn laughed. "My mom forgot to pack my hat and sunblock."

"Maybe if you didn't refuse my generous offer to share mine you might've saved yourself a week's worth of aloe baths."

"I accepted eventually, you've got to give me that."

"Yeah, after cooking yourself to a crisp. Don't worry though, I'll get you some to take."

"You will?" Quinn's tone told Santana she was genuinely touched.

"Of course. Can't have you coming back looking like a tomato." She said with a cheeky grin.

"What about you? Is it just you and your mom or is your abuela coming to see you?"

"Yeah, she's going to spend Christmas with us. I'm excited to see her, I feel like I've been a bad granddaughter, I haven't seen her in a few weeks. I got her a gift though, so hopefully, I can sweeten her up a little."

"Lucia's at her dad's right?"

"Yeah. No matter how many times she's missed Christmas with us, it's still weird every time. She text me earlier that her step-mom let her bleach her hair and it turned orange. Aren't you glad it's me you got out of the family? The one who can actually dye hair. Her dad even messaged me, which was nice."

"I haven't spoken to my dad in while." Quinn said as she twirled a pieces of Santana's hair around her finger.

"Do you want to?"

"Not really. Maybe someday."

"Fair enough." They let a comfortable silence fall between them. Long enough for Santana to fall into a light doze.

"You best not drool all over me."

The incoherent jumble of sounds that Santana responded with made Quinn chuckle softly, conscious to not wake her girlfriend.

Quinn was disappointed that she'd be missing Christmas with Santana, but they'd promised to spend all their time together up until she had to leave. With school pretty much over, that time was coming to an end sooner than she'd liked. Hopefully, time with her mom wouldn't drag too much and hey, maybe they'd bond or something like that.

With the somewhat promising thought, Quinn planted a soft kiss to Santana's forehead and let herself drift into sleep as well.

...

The holidays were upon Santana and her mother had set her to task by decorating the last-minute tree and setting the table whilst she flapped about the kitchen to make sure everything was in order.

They'd broken up from school with warm goodbyes to their friends and a few days later Santana was saying her goodbyes to Quinn. Since hitting the ocean, Quinn's connection had been spotty, so she hadn't been holding her breath to hear off of her any time soon. But as they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder. She felt kind of pathetic for missing Quinn so much so soon, but she couldn't help it. She was counting down the days until she saw her again.

"Santana! Have you put out the good plates?" Santana's mom, Maribel, called from the kitchen.

"Yes, mom!" Santana quickly collected the plates she'd put out to swap them with the ones her mom was on about.

After all the rushing about and frustration over the tangled Christmas lights, Santana stood hands on hips admiring her work. The dining room looked fancy as fuck if she did say so herself. The tree was decorated to perfection. She had just taken a picture to send to her sister when there was a knock at the door.

"San, get that will you. It'll be your abuela."

Santana felt a girlish excitement flood her, she had missed her abuela so much. She ran to the door, sliding to a stop as soon as she reached it. Flinging the door open, she was met with the face of the woman who had help raise her and was at the heart of so many of Santana's favourite memories.

"Abuela!" Santana greeted her with a warm hug, expecting to be squeezed within an inch of her life in return. When she didn't feel her abuela's arms wrap around her confusion washed over her.

Pulling back, hands still resting on her abuela's shoulders, Santana gave her a questioning look. In return, her abuela stared blankly back. The coldness of the reception alerted to Santana that something was wrong. Really wrong.

Taking a step back to let her abuela in a cold dread began to settle in the pit of Santana's stomach. When her abuela simply hung her coat and ignored her she felt herself break into a sweat.

_What's happening?_

"You're just in time. Get settled, I'll bring the food out." Maribel said.

Santana watched from the dining room's threshold as her abuela took her seat and pointedly refused to look her way.

"Are you ok, abuela? You don't seem yourself." Santana choked out, overcome with the anxiety of knowing something was off.

"Santana, what are you doing?" Maribel asked as she brought the turkey out from the kitchen. "Sit down."

Santana's eyes never left her abuela as she slowly made her way to sit down too.

"How are you, mama?" Maribel asked with a kiss to her mother's cheek.

"I have been better." The words were uttered with such a coolness that Maribel glanced to Santana to gauge whether she'd heard right. "You know, it is a shame."

"What's a shame?" Alma looked to Maribel when she asked.

"That today has been ruined."

Santana clenched her fists to stop herself from fiddling with the utensils in front of her.

Maribel laughed. "You're so dramatic. It must be where Santana gets it from," she winked at her daughter, hoping the teasing would get a smile out of her at least. But her daughter never looked her way.

"She gets nothing from me."

"Mama! What are you saying?"

The noise released from Santana's throat could only be described as a whimper, she was so confused, this had to be a nightmare.

"She is no granddaughter of mine." Alma pointed at Santana and it knocked all of the breath out of her.

"Abuelita." Her voice was pleading.

"No."

"Mama, explain yourself." Maribel's voice was stern, clearly confused as well but annoyed with her mother.

"I have nothing to explain. She is just like her father."

"What?" Both Maribel and Santana asked. Maribel's question was a pitch higher than her daughter's.

Alma pulled out her a crumpled up piece of paper and tried to iron out the creases to show her mom what looked to be a Facebook post, slamming it down on the table when she was satisfied it was straightened out. "Look."

Santana's mouth felt watery and her stomach hadn't stopped flipping. The legs of her chair screeched against the floor as she stood suddenly at the sight of what the picture was meant to be.

Honestly, she almost laughed. Almost. Her mind tripping over the idea of her abuela going to the library to print off a whole website page just to have proof on hand. Frothing at the mouth, no less. Complaining to all the other fossils in earshot, who also didn't know how to use computers, how disgraceful she was. Better yet, she struggled in bitter silence trying to figure out how to print something off by herself so she didn't have to face the shame of someone seeing she had a gay granddaughter. That thought is what made it an almost.

Her mom picked it up, a frown growing on her face the longer she looked.

"What is this?" She looked between Santana and Alma.

The picture was one of many in an album tagged 'xmas mems' and posted by Brittany. Unfortunately, Quinn and Santana's kiss had been caught in the background of one of them. Brittany must've tagged Santana in the album. She hadn't thought to change her privacy settings. How could she be so dumb? God she felt sick.

"Mom, I-" she couldn't finish her sentence as she felt overcome with tears.

"It's a disgrace."

There was a pause, it felt longer than it probably was and it didn't help Santana with that sick feeling.

"Don't." Maribel said finally and firmly.

"What?" Alma replied just as firm.

"Don't talk about her like that."

"Can you not see?" Alma waved her hands at the paper in Maribel's. "It's shameful, Maribel."

"Santana. What's this about?"

Santana couldn't think straight. She couldn't piece the thoughts together to even try to get out of it, maybe she didn't want to get out of it. "I like girls, mom."

"You like girls." Her mom's voice was surprisingly steady and it gave her a little bit of reassurance. "And Quinn?"

"Quinn's my girlfriend."

"Your girlfriend? And you're telling people this?" Alma spat.

"Shut up, mama."

"What?" Alma turned her venom on her daughter.

"I said shut up. Just stop, okay." Maribel was resolute but distressed. Seeing her usually so bull-headed and defiant daughter seem so small was breaking her heart. "I think you should leave."

"You want _me_ to leave?" Alma got out between her teeth.

"You heard me."

"Well haven't you changed your tune. I thought you had more sense than this." Alma stood and collected her things. Before she left completely she finally addressed Santana properly. "I expected more of you."

It was like a knife to the chest.

She thought losing Brittany had hurt, but this. This felt like she'd been gutted.

"Mom," she cried.

Her mom pulled her into a hug, letting her tears fall as she rubbed her back to soothe her.

"Santana-"

"Mom, what did she mean?" Santana cut in between tears.

"She's an old woman set in her ways-"

"No, not that. About my dad. What did she mean?"

"San," she stroked Santana's hair, "it's not the time."

Santana's brow furrowed, she stepped out of her mother's embrace. "What?"

Her mom had tears in her eyes as they shifted across Santana's face, "Santana, please."

Santana took another step back, her mind reeling. "I don't understand. I- I've never pushed you about him. Maybe I should've."

"It's complicated. Your abuela," Maribel paused to play with the rings on her fingers before steeling herself and starting again. "Your abuela didn't approve. She stopped me from seeing him, had him kicked out of his house. He's been gone for so long, Santana."

"But why? Why am I like him? Because I'm a disappointment?" Santana's voice caught.

"He's gay, Santana. We were so young when we had you, he didn't know what he wanted until... he did. By then I was already pregnant. I found out by accident and told your abuela straight away. She hated him, she hated him so much, Santana. I did too for a while, I'm not proud of that. He broke my heart and I thought I wanted him gone. At the time I really did."

Santana stood in a numbed silence.

"Say something."

"What did you do?"

"We told his family. When he got back from work his father threw him out into the street with all his things and told him to never come back." Maribel's tears began to fall as she bit her lip and turned her head away in shame. "I didn't understand, Santana. I was a kid, I was stupid and I didn't realise what I was doing to the boy I loved."

"I can't believe this. I need to... I don't know. Sit down I think." Santana walked into the living room and sank into the sofa. Her mom followed her cautiously. Dried tear tracks lined her face, her throat hurt with the effort of holding back the rest of the tears she had. "My dad had no choice but to leave me. I've spent my whole life thinking he'd left because he couldn't be bothered. That he didn't give a shit." Her voice wobbled.

"Santana, I'm so sorry." Maribel pleaded, clutching her hands tightly together to stop herself from reaching out.

"Is that why you hate me?"

"What? I don't hate you!"

"You don't love me the same and now I know why."

"Don't be ridiculous, I love you utterly and wholly."

Santana scoffed and pushed her head as far back as she could to keep the tears at bay.

"Did he try to see me?"

Her mother's silence was deafening.

"Well!" Santana shouted, making her mom flinch. "Did he?"

"Once. I told him to leave and he never came back."

Santana laughed humourlessly and stood. "I can't do this." Santana closed her eyes and tried to centre herself. Thinking back to all the times she'd brought her dad up and how weird her mom and abuela would act. And then it hit her. There was a card. A card on her birthday that had been snatched out of her grasp. She was only five or six and couldn't remember all the details, but she remembered how the excitement over this magic, posted card was ripped away. She'd never had a posted card before, she'd seen it on the floor by the door and wanted to show her mommy. "He wrote to me."

"How-"

"He wrote to me and you didn't tell me." Santana's tone had darkened considerably. "I'm an adult now, mom. Just tell me."

"He did."

"Show me."

"Santana, I don't have them anymore."

"Bullshit!" Without warning, Santana moved quickly out into the hall and up the stairs.

"Santana!"

Santana swung open her mother's wardrobe and began to ransack it in search of the post from her dad that she just knew her mom still had. In her haste, she had smacked her hand pretty hard on the sharp edge of something and had started bleeding. The blood had started to drip onto the carpet, she hardly even realised.

And then she found it. A black box. As simple as that. Tucked in the far reaches, bland enough to be ignored by two curious daughters who raided your closet for colourful clothes and shiny things.

Lifting the lid she saw a pile of envelopes, all addressed to her. She fingered through them and couldn't believe the sheer amount of them. She placed the lid back on and turned to see her mom standing there, watching her. Fear in her eyes. _Coward._ She thought bitterly.

"I'm going to Rachel's." Santana said before she'd even really thought about what she was doing.

"Santana, it's Christmas. You can't leave, not like this. It's dangerous to drive when you're this emotional."

"Don't patronise me."

"I'm not. I'm your mother, I care about you. I don't want you to get hurt."

Santana laughed again, "Thanks for the concern."

She stormed past her mom into her own room and shoved some clothes into a bag, along with her charger and other things she'd need for a couple of days away. She took the stairs two at a time as she made her way down them, sighing when she saw her mom stood against the front door.

"Move." Santana snatched her keys off the side.

"Santana, don't leave. Please." Her mom begged. Seeing her mom like this made her heart ache, but she was overwhelmed and needed to leave. She felt her temper flaring as it was, staying wouldn't help matters.

"Mom, you need to move." When she didn't Santana took another deep breath, twisted on her heel and headed toward the back door.

Her mom's cries were the last thing she heard before the only sound was the crunching of snow beneath her feet. She'd made it to the end of Quinn's driveway before she realised her feet had taken her there on autopilot. Her heart ached again. Turning back around, she made her way back to her own house and quickly got in her car and put it into gear. As she drove to Rachel's she felt like she was floating above herself, every street passed was a blur, she didn't even notice she'd stopped in Rachel's driveway until she heard somebody knocking at the driver side window.

"Santana?" Rachel's worried voice carried through the glass.

Putting the car in park Santana gripped the steering wheel with everything she had and let out a gut-wrenching sob. Her chest heaved and her throat was tight. Everything just hurt so bad.

Worst. Christmas. Ever.


	12. Happy Families

"Santana!" Rachel flung her door open to pull Santana into a hug. "What's wrong? What's happened?"

Santana's words came out in a garbled jumble that Rachel couldn't understand.

"Come inside with me. It's too cold out here."

Calming somewhat, Santana nodded her head against Rachel's shoulder and let the other girl step out of her way. Before getting out she remembered the box and brought it inside along with her bag.

"Let me take those," Rachel reached for the bag and box but Santana stopped her.

"No, no. I'll keep the box."

Rachel gave her a perplexed look but didn't say anything.

"Is that Santana?" Leroy looked over the back of the sofa and smiled at her. "Why aren't you with your-?" Rachel shot him a glare and shook her head. "I mean, so glad to have you. Come in, sit."

Santana did just that. She sat. And she sat. Mindlessly, she played with the seams of the box.

After a couple of minutes of not speaking Leroy decided to pipe up, "That a present?"

His comment pulled Santana from her reverie, she looked down at the box in her hands and chuckled. "No. Not quite."

"What is it, San?" Rachel quietly asked from her spot next to Santana.

"You'll never believe it, Rach." Santana's sudden grin was quite jarring. "We got one more thing in common."

"What's that?"

"My dad's gay too."

"But I thought-"

"I don't know him, I know." The grin swiftly fell back off her face. "My mom's hidden the truth from me for so long. And now," her chin wobbled. "And now my abuela hates me."

Rachel was confused, as was her father. Hiram had just come in from outside and was stamping snow of his shoes, humming some indistinguishable show tune.

"Howdy-ho, family!"

"Dad, shh!" Rachel chastised.

"What makes you think that, honey? I'm sure she doesn't." Leroy said.

"She does. She hates me. She hates me because I'm gay too."

Realisation settled in Leroy's gaze and he shared a look with his husband. "Oh, sweetheart."

"Tell us what happened." Hiram came to sit on the other side of Santana and soothingly rubbed her back as she ran through everything that had gone down at her house. It had been an emotional rollercoaster she just wanted off of, but that'd require forgetting anything had ever happened and that wasn't going to happen. The longer she talked the more and processed the deeper the pit in her stomach felt.

"I feel sick."

Rachel gave her dads an alarmed look, "Here, I'll show you where the bathroom is." She stood and took Santana's hand, leading her to the bathroom upstairs so that they could have a conversation without her dads overhearing.

Santana splashed her face with cold water and used the hand towel Rachel handed her to dry her face.

"What are you going to do?"

"God knows. I wasn't really thinking. Maybe I should have stayed, given my mom a chance to talk, but I'm here now." Santana realised she'd dropped all of this in Rachel's lap on Christmas. _Way to go, asshole._ Shaking her head Santana turned to face the other girl. "Rachel, I'm so sorry for turning up like this. You don't deserve the drama of it all, it's my problem. I'll go."

"No, no. It's fine." Rachel reached for her arm as she went for the door. "Don't be silly, I'm your friend and my dads won't mind if you want to stick around."

Santana was so grateful for Rachel, with Quinn and Lucia not around she really felt alone in that moment she'd stopped at the end of Quinn's driveway. She'd told her mom she was going to Rachel's but she wasn't sure where she was going to stop. Being here and knowing for a fact that Rachel had her back had her wanting to cry for a different reason altogether.

Instead, she took Rachel by surprise and hugged her. It didn't last as long as either would have liked but Santana saw that her cut hand was leaving marks on Rachel's clothes in the mirror.

"Damn," she pulled her hand to get a look at it, it was superficial but it still stung a little. "Sorry."

"It's okay, it'll wash out." The silence that filled the bathroom was broken by Santana's stomach growling, making Rachel laugh. "Hungry?"

Santana put a hand on her stomach as if it'd quiet it. "A little. It all went to shit just as the food was ready, how inconsiderate of my abuela. She should have saved it for dessert," she gave a pained laugh of her own.

"Well I'll keep you fed and watered, don't you worry." Rachel gave her a sympathetic smile. "Come on, we'll have something to eat and we can figure out the rest later."

Santana gave her a small nod and followed Rachel's lead back downstairs. Her heart still sat heavily in her chest as she listened to Rachel and her dads talk around the table, occasionally addressing her to make her feel included. She wanted to talk to Quinn, she needed to talk to Brittany and her mom. She wondered who her mom would call, if she were to call anybody at all. Lucia? No, she wouldn't upset her when she was so far away unable to do anything about it. Should she call her?

She shook her head to herself and picked at her food, the longer she tried to think things through the less of an appetite she had.

The sound of her name had her looking up again to meet the concerned gaze of Leroy, she didn't know what he had said but she nodded anyway and lowered her gaze once more to rearrange her plate.

Where was her dad? Did he still miss her? Did he still write? She hadn't gotten a chance to get a good look through the envelopes yet. Maybe they were just birthday cards, cards for the holidays. Nothing that would tell her anything about him. Or maybe he'd written letters that told her how much he wished he could have seen her grow up.

The hypotheticals clouded her brain. She could find out right now if she wanted, but she was scared.

She wasn't sure what she wanted from them.

...

Some time had passed and it was late in the evening, Rachel and Santana were in Rachel's room getting ready for bed. Rachel had insisted she stay if she wanted to, not wanting Santana to feel as though she had to leave.

Rachel was concerned, Santana had been very quiet ever since they'd rejoined her dads. She watched her out of the corner of her eye as she brushed her hair in the mirror. Santana had gotten changed and was sitting on the edge of her bed looking at the box she'd brought with her.

When Santana suddenly looked up, Rachel tried her best to make it look like she hadn't been watching her.

"I think I'm going to call my mom." Santana said, placing the box on the floor and tucking it under the bed with the heel of her foot.

Rachel turned to face her and met her eye, unsure as to whether she wanted input or not. She would have encouraged it but didn't want to push.

When Santana stood and pulled her phone out of the band of her sleep pants, Rachel's eyes flicked down to the box. _Curiosity killed the cat, Rachel._ She told herself. Biting her lip as she resisted peeking, even if it was just a little bit.

"I'll be back in a sec." Rachel nodded, looking back to the other girl.

The sound of the door clicking closed was like the sound of a gun at the start of a race. If she was going to look, it was going to have to be fast.

Rachel was almost tripping over herself to get to her bed, banging her knees as she fell before where the box sat. Before she placed her hands on it, she paused. Her conscience nagging at her to not do it.

Then she heard Santana's voice murmuring through the door and the potential guilt stopped her altogether. She'd just have to leave it to Santana as to whether she'd share with her or not. She almost whined to herself.

Her ears pricked up again when she heard Santana's voice raise in tell-tale frustration, it soon dipped back to a low murmur and then it stopped.

Rachel quickly stood and threw herself onto the bed, tucking her arms behind her bed in a ploy to act casual.

Santana re-entered the room, pausing when she saw Rachel on her bed, lounging like she was on a beach somewhere sunny and not in her bedroom during a dreary winter in Lima.

"What are you doing?" Santana's voice was a little weak with tears that had been recently shed. She wiped a tear as her face split into an amused grin at the sight of Rachel's attempt at holding herself up to look at her - there being no pillows supporting her head or arms.

"I'm relaxing." Rachel said, her arms getting tired as she tried to hold her position.

That had Santana letting out a small chuckle, "You look _sooo_ relaxed." She came to sit next to Rachel and gave her a small shove to stop her ab workout.

Rachel was thankful she could move her arms to pull a pillow down to lie on. "How was it?"

"It was okay. She was upset still, she said she would have come to get me but didn't know where you lived. She's been going a little crazy so I think she's just glad I got back to her." Santana smiled despite herself, picturing her mom getting all worked up in the car and ready to go, only to realise she had no clue where she was going. "Quinn is away and super hard to get a hold of so she wasn't sure who to call. But we've agreed to have a proper talk when I get back home. I told her I'm staying here tonight, but I'll go back first thing. Get out of your hair and you know, deal with my shit."

"Have breakfast at least, you're more than welcome to. And I'm pretty sure my dads like you." Rachel sat up and crossed her legs. She wasn't sure what more she could say in the moment and instead chose to pick at her duvet.

"They do? That's a first. Parents usually hate me. I don't get it, I'm hilarious and keep it real. What's not to like?"

"I couldn't possibly take a guess." The smirk itching at Rachel's lips made Santana smile in return. "So…"

"So?"

"Don't make me ask, please."

Santana was genuinely unsure as to what Rachel was getting at until the other girl leaned over the bed to pull the box out and plonk it between them.

"Oh! Oh, I see." Santana proceeded to pull it towards herself and lifted the lid slowly, watching Rachel's eyes follow her hands. She stopped just to see Rachel's face fall, her eyes flicking back up to meet Santana's amused gaze. "How hard was it not to look whilst I was out there?" She nodded her head to the door.

"Santana!" Rachel let out a scandalised gasp. "How could you ask such a thing? And of me! Your dear friend Rachel."

Santana rolled her eyes. "Okay, drama queen. You've done better than me, I would have opened this bad boy before the door even shut on your way out."

"Oh," Rachel reigned in the indignation, "okay. I suppose I might as well admit it was quite trying."

Santana finally took the lid off and scooped the stack of envelopes that filled the box. It troubled her that this paper might have accounted for so many years of her life. Time that could have been spent with the dad she didn't know.

Shaking the thought out of her mind she tried to focus on the present. She took the one from the very top and saw her name written out in a neat, flowing script, she traced it with her finger, wondering if it was possible to inherit the way she wrote as she saw the similarities in her own handwriting. Turning it over, she ran her finger under the envelope's loose seam and pulled out a card that read "Have a Super 5th Birthday!" with a picture of a kitten in a cape on the front. The image made her think of Brittany's beast of a cat, she doubted it ever looked as cute as the kitten on the card, the thought fell away to memories of the birthday mentioned.

Santana had hated her fifth birthday. The distinct memory of being scolded in front of her friends and family by her uncle came to mind. She'd had a party in her back yard and her friends and family had come, it was one of the few occasions she'd been in the same space as so many of her relatives at once. The vivid image of her pink and purple playhouse and the memory of hiding in there because her family were strangers to her and her cousin James had snitched on her for shoving him, even though he deserved it, is what she remembered most. He'd thrown her doll into the tall hedges at the back of the yard. Even at that young age she remembered being pissed off. He was a little jerk. Probably still was.

She was still hiding when Jessica, one of her friends from kindergarten, snuck in too. The ruckus from outside was quieter and they could just hang out and play house in the bubble the playhouse created. Innocently enough, she was the dad and Jessica was the mom. And like she'd seen her friend's moms and dads do, they'd shared a small peck.

Her uncle had seen by chance, he must have been looking for her because of James and thought it appropriate to tell her quite loudly in front of everyone, that girls didn't kiss. That it wasn't right.

Santana felt the embarrassment like it was yesterday, she remembered she couldn't even lift her eyes for more than a second or two before they fell back to the floor. He'd ruined her birthday. And for what? She remembered that Quinn must've been there too. She wondered if she remembered it as vividly as she did.

The party carried on like normal after that, but it'd left a bitter taste in Santana's mouth that not even a piece of cake could make better.

"I hated this one." Santana said out loud, suddenly aware she'd probably been staring and leaving Rachel in further suspense. "Sucked major ass."

She opened up the card:

"Dear Santana,

How you are growing so fast! Not only yesterday were you a little baby in my arms. I wish to hold you again someday, to scoop you up and squeeze you until you pop!

Lots of love, Dad."

There was a heart and some kisses, a small note on the left side on the card, clearly left for her mom.

Santana read it and then reread it. That didn't sound right. Right?

"Can you read this and tell me what you think it means?" She handed Rachel the card.

Rachel's brow furrowed. "That they spoke? You'll have to check the others."

"But why didn't my mom say anything on the phone? She knows I have these."

"You'll have to ask her. Maybe it's something she needs to prepare for? I'm not trying to defend her or anything like that. But you being here gives her the chance to figure out what she needs to say."

"Get her story straight more like it," Santana grumbled. This was all such a headache.

She opened up a few more of the envelopes, all of them varying in purpose. Some were to wish her a happy birthday; others were for Christmas; Easter; and so on. She noticed they weren't consistent, a year or two missed every now and then, she wondered why that was. Lost in the mail? He forgot?

In every one was a message to her mom that it seemed to Santana that he must have gotten a response at least a couple of times. Did her mom know how to reach him?

She just hoped that tomorrow wouldn't be a lost cause and she could get the full picture.

…

Santana unlocked the front door as quietly as she could, hoping that her mom was asleep and she could take a minute to kick back in her room in peace. The warmth of the house was a welcome change to the snappy weather outside.

She took to the stairs as quickly and quietly as she could, tossing her bag onto her bed and swiftly following once she reached her room.

She lay there until she felt herself falling to sleep, a knock at her door gave her the reminder that it wasn't time for a nap. Perhaps she wasn't as sneaky as she thought.

"Come in." She called, her voice muffled for having her face squished to her pillow.

Maribel hesitantly cracked open the door, as though she hadn't just gotten permission. She gave Santana a small smile, her eyes still a little red from the other night. "Hey," she croaked, coughing to clear her throat after she spoke.

Santana sat up and watched her mom as she came to join her on her bed. "So."

"So." Maribel looked at her daughter for a long minute, as though her stare could convey all of the words she wished she could communicate. "I understand there is a lot you want to, need to, know."

"You said you told him to leave and he never came back, but the cards, the everything. Did you speak to him after he left? Do you still speak?"

"It's complicated. Your father and I haven't spoken in a very long time. He would leave those notes to let me know how he was, he must've known I was worried. I was tempted to reach out, to try and find him, but in the beginning I was too scared of the consequence. I didn't want to be left to raise you by myself, without your abuela, without your family."

"But..."

"But I have spoken to him on the very rare occasion. Actually, I suppose we have spoken recently. I rang him last night. That box you have isn't everything, some stuff was addressed to me, though it didn't make much of a difference. You've never been bothered by what's been posted, you've never needed to be. I can't tell you how sorry I am. But as I said, I rang him. He'd sent me his number a couple of years ago and I've never made use of it."

Santana wasn't sure how to feel. All she knew was that curiosity was winning the battle of her current emotions. "What'd he say?"

Maribel had started crying again, she wiped her eyes and smiled through her tears. "He couldn't believe it, Santana. I thought he'd be angry with me, but he wasn't. I told him what happened, that you'd found out. He asked about you, he wants to meet you so badly."

Santana's heart had picked up, she felt like a little girl again. Eager for a father's attention that she never had. "He does?"

"He does." It's then that Santana noticed Maribel was holding a slip of paper. "This is his address, we spoke for a long while and we agreed that you could go and see him in the summer."

Santana read the paper, her eyebrows rising, "California?" _Somewhere with sunshine at least._ "But why not now?" Santana felt the frustration and anger from last night bubble inside of her, she couldn't help but feel this was so unnecessary, her not knowing for so long, having to come out to know the truth.

"Because you have to finish school Santana, I know you might want to laugh in my face for asking you of anything, but you have to know I want what's best for you. I want you to graduate, to get into the college of your dreams and have an education. Your dad agrees."

Santana scoffed. "Great, doesn't even know me and is telling me what to do already." Though the more she thought about it, it seemed like the smartest idea. Also, it gave her time to prepare herself. What if he was a weirdo? He may be her dad, but she'd met Quinn's dad and he wasn't exactly a barrel of laughs. On the other hand, what if he was the best thing since sliced bread? Either way, she nodded. "Okay, after graduation."

Maribel gave her a soft smile and patted her knee. It seemed like she didn't know what to say so Santana put her out of her misery.

"But Mom, I need to know why you didn't tell me earlier."

"I know, my love. I know. All I can tell you is that when it happened it made sense to me and I suppose it was easy to keep it the way it was. And even though telling you had occurred to me throughout the years, there were so many things I wasn't sure about. What would've been the right age to tell you that your dad wasn't accepted by our family? By the woman you adored more than anybody in your life? You might have asked why you couldn't see him and I wouldn't have an answer good enough. I'm sorry it took that horrible night for this to happen. But I want you to know I'm so proud of you, it was very brave of you."

Silence settled between them again. Santana's thoughts flitting between her dad and her abuela. There were a lot of uncertainties in her life, but there was something freeing about having the weight of telling her mom off of her shoulders. She could only hope her abuela would come to see her for the little girl she'd always known. To realise that nothing had changed.

"I will speak to her, Santana. You just focus on you and try not to let this weigh too heavily on your heart. Give her time, if she has any sense she'll come around."

Santana nodded and accepted the hug her mom gave her. The warmth and steady hold of her mom was something she'd missed, she held her a little tighter and was rewarded with her mom squeezing back.

"I'm going for NYU by the way," Santana smiled at the thought of living in New York with Quinn, hanging out in the city with Rachel and Kurt. "New York seems like my kind of place." She murmured into her mom's shoulder. She could picture the small apartment her and Quinn would share, how it'd be a blend of both of their styles. How they'd carve out a piece of their home for each other and do boring, domestic stuff together. It set her heart fluttering. She couldn't wait for her to get back. Then thought of Quinn gave her a bright idea.

Suddenly she pulled back, "Mom!"

Her sudden outburst made Maribel jump. "What?"

Santana's face broke out into a huge smile. "I have the _best_ idea ever."


	13. Cruisin'

Quinn and Judy pulled into the port, their driver already climbing out of the car to get their bags before Quinn could even register the sheer size of the ship she'd be spending the next week on.

"Fuck me." She said under her breath.

Judy was chattering to the driver by the time Quinn followed suit and got out of the car, pulling the shades that rested on top of her head down as she did. The weather was a whole lot warmer already and they weren't even in the Caribbean yet.

It would make a nice change from the usual minus temperatures that Lima endured around this time of the year. Quinn could have probably dealt with it, but she supposed a week in the sun wouldn't do any harm. It wasn't as though Christmas day would have been spent with her family anyway.

The main downside was the lack of Santana. They'd been messaging since she'd set off from Lima; she was well aware that cell service wasn't exactly great in the middle of the ocean so she'd been making the most of it. They weren't exactly co-dependent, but fuck, Santana was her everything at this point. It was going to be weird not having her there, even through SMS.

Judy called her name to pull her attention and in no time she was being hustled onto the ship and guided to their suite.

Her mom had splashed some cash on the best room they could get. She wasn't complaining, especially since the room was big enough to give the illusion of space. It was like they'd somehow built a small apartment into the ship, she wondered what the captain's room must've looked like.

Thankfully, having so much space meant no sharing with her mother dearest in the near future. Not that she'd be spending a lot of time in the room.

She glanced out of her room's window, the blue skies and sunshine calling out to her.

There was a lounger out there with her name on it, maybe a few cocktails if she could find the right kind of people. She was sure her mom could keep herself entertained whilst she explored.

"Hey, I'm going to take a look around," Quinn said, leaving Judy to her own devices.

It was huge. That was the conclusion Quinn had come to as soon as she'd covered her suite's floor. The number of floors, decks and an all manner of places to get food and drink merely confirmed the fact. If she had wanted to, she could have fooled herself into thinking she was still on land. She'd only just reached the top deck when she noticed they'd set off. It surprised her; she thought she would have felt it. Her question as to whether she had her sea legs troubled her less now than it did on the drive from the airport.

She squinted up at the sun as she felt its direct heat. She didn't fight against the reflex to close her eyes, rather, she stood under sun's shine and allowed her muscles to relax and her mind to empty.

Reopening them she shaded her eyes to give them time to readjust and get a better look around, her gaze skipping over half naked bodies and a busy bar to land on the pool. Its reflective surface bouncing the sun back into her eyes once more, just begging her to get in.

And just like that, her afternoon plans were decided. She could get used to this.

…

Back in their suite Quinn had changed into her swimsuit, she had her towel underarm and was searching through her suitcase to find one of the books she'd brought to pass the time when she came upon her sunblock. The sunblock Santana specifically said she'd get for her. A soft chuckle escaped her at the cheek of her girlfriend. Factor 50 was a bit much.

Or so she thought.

Three hours later Quinn was back on the deck and regretting only using her factor 20 and sparingly at that.

Her skin seriously felt like it was bubbling.

After an hour too long in the sun, she had resorted to dragging herself over to the shaded sun loungers, embarrassed that she'd fallen asleep and let herself get so bad.

A hiss of pain escaped her as she touched the tender skin of her shoulders.

"Rookie mistake." A voice came from next to her.

A boy around her age and who was a remarkably beautiful one at that smirked at her over a glass of a cloudy-white concoction.

Quinn quirked an eyebrow, "Did I ask?"

The boy didn't bat an eye, instead, his smirk grew into a toothy smile, "I'm Tom by the way."

"Quinn."

Tom's gaze drifted to behind her and lingered, making her turn to see what he was admiring. What she saw was another quite attractive young man, only instead of Tom's slim build, this other boy was lean and muscled. He must've seen Quinn staring too as he did his best to make his flexing look natural.

Quinn rolled her eyes and turned back to Tom. "Are all the lifeguards freshmen?"

"Freshman? Oh honey, no. Maybe in college. He's some Harvard boy, I should know. He's a family friend, or at least his bore of a mother and father are. Garrett over there is just nice to look at. He doesn't hang out with lowly non-Ivys like me, he's normally found with the other pretty rich kids who have more powder between their ears than brains."

"Why's he a lifeguard if he's here with family?"

Tom took a long sip, "He thinks it makes him hotter. I mean it does." Another sip, his gaze still drifting over to Garrett. "But I don't think he gets paid, he's just a poser. A sexy, sexy poser."

Quinn took another look over her _very_ burnt shoulder and caught eyes with Garrett. That was signal enough to have the guy strutting over, his step slowing after his initial eagerness to reach her.

_Smooth. Real smooth. Oh God, he's actually coming over. Fuck._

For all the good pretending he wasn't closing in did her, her attempt to apply aloe vera on her skin only opened the invitation further, apparently.

The slap of flip-flops came to a halt just behind her. Tom raised his eyebrows at her.

"Hey." _Jesus, please help me._ "Want any help with that?" _Agh._

Quinn briefly squeezed her eyes shut and took a calming breath before meeting Garrett's eyes and putting on her best sickly-sweet smile, "No, thanks."

Somehow Garrett took that as her playing hard to get, his mouth twitched as he licked his lips in an attempt to be sexy. "Ha, okay, okay. I see you."

Quinn's smile dropped as she gaped at him in disbelief.

"Name's Garrett Morgan." He went to cup his chin but dropped his hand before it reached his face, his awkward movements counteracting any swagger he could possibly have. "What's yours... ba-"

Quinn's stare dipped into something a little colder, bringing Garrett's sentence to an end.

"It's Quinn." Tom butted in.

Garrett looked his way, as though he'd only just noticed his presence. He nodded his head in acknowledgement.

Quinn was thinking about hitting Tom in the face with the book she'd brought with her.

"Cool. That's really cool." Garrett leaned from one foot to the other. "So, like, my dad is a shareholder in the biz and you know, I pretty much own this cruise liner."

"Your family you mean." Tom once again piped up.

Garrett's sneer would've been more threatening if he looked a little less like a toddler that'd just told somebody they were the biggest meanie _ever_.

"Yeah, my family. We're a big deal."

"Sure. That's great, I'm just-" Quinn started.

"And I was thinking I could treat you to a spot at my family's table today, at lunch."

"I'm busy that day."

"But.. but I said today. We're on the ship until tomorrow."

"Oh, yeah. I'm still busy."

The forlorn look on Garrett's pretty face didn't last too long, his smarmy smile coming back full force in no time.

"Well if you're busy today, surely tonight you're free? You should come to my room, I-"

"Erm, no." Quinn was sick of playing nice. Or at least her version of nice. "I'm not interested."

"No, no. Not like that!" He paused. "I mean… unless?" Quinn shot him daggers. "No! I'm having a get-together. It's the place to be, all us kids leave our folks to play their weird old people games until they pass out in the bar whilst we, you know..." He wiggled his eyebrows at Quinn.

"I'll pa-"

"She'll go." Tom once again decided to participate and speak for Quinn. She was seriously about to hit him. "Only if I can come."

Garrett literally pouted and furrowed his brow in deep thought, or something akin to it. "Argh, man. But you suck!"

"Take it or leave it."

Garrett huffed and eyed Quinn. "Okay, okay." He gave her another smile. "It starts at ten, but I'll make it nine for you. See ya." He gave her a wink and walked away, putting more sway into his stride than necessary.

"What the fuck?" Quinn bit out.

"What?" Tom shrugged, as though he hadn't just used her as a bargaining chip.

"I don't even fucking know you."

"So? You've never made new friends before?"

Quinn ignored him and finished applying the aloe, as she did she tried to spy an empty lounger but saw none. She was stuck with the one she had. Laying back she tried to relax in the heat and forget the whole ordeal. The slurping coming from beside her making it difficult to do so.

"Want one?"

Quinn opened one of her eyes and turned her head toward Tom. He was waving his glass at her.

Okay, she'd bite, "What is it?"

"Something tasty."

"Okay."

Tom's full lips split open into a grin, "Good choice."

He soon returned with a drink for her and they sat in amicable silence as they drank away. It was rather sweet and not dissimilar to the concoctions Santana would make up; only the alcohol wasn't as obvious in this one.

Dangerous, very dangerous. But tasty too.

Before she even finished it Tom had run off to get another for them both. A little into her second she was already feeling warmer, and it wasn't for the climate.

"You were right. They are tasty." Quinn said.

"I normally am."

Tom observed Quinn as she took languid sips. She was a new face, he wasn't used to those. Not of a younger breed anyway. Normally they were one foot in the grave. Every winter it was the same families, these types of cruises attracted those of unorthodox traditional types - with money. Much of the clientele were from well off backgrounds, the extortionate prices made sure of that.

He supposed the place wasn't too shabby either.

"What's your deal?" He said.

"My deal? What do you mean?"

"I've not seen you before."

"And?"

"And that's not usual. What happened? Dad remarried and brought you along to bond with his new family?"

"Not quite."

"Well you're not old enough for a midlife crisis so I'll assume you're not the reason you're here."

Quinn laughed at that. "Well maybe in a roundabout way, but blah, semantics."

Tom let out a soft laugh of his own, "What was with the icy reception toward Hasselhoff over there?" He nodded to Garrett who was talking to some older ladies at the bar - definitely not watching the pool.

"I'm not interested." Quinn couldn't emphasise the point enough.

"Got a boyfriend or somethin'?"

"Or somethin'." Quinn copied, a smirk creeping onto her face as she took another sip and shot Tom a look.

He took a second to regard her then broke out into a smirk of his own. "Well, well, well. Must be one hot piece that's all I'll say."

"Oh, she is."

"She? Even better." He leaned over to Quinn's lounger for her to cheers him, she happily clinked her glass with his. "Cheers to that, sister."

"Speaking of deals, what's happening tonight? And why were you so _desperate_ to go, hm?"

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry. But you will thank me later, I've been needing an in on this bad boy since we all hit puberty, but unfortunately for me I haven't been lucky enough to have the invitation extended. I mean not to say I haven't been, because who the fuck cares a couple of hours in? But girl, the stories I've heard, we need to be there from the start. And don't worry about Garrett, he's harmless."

"We'll see."

"So you're coming?"

"Sure, there's fuck all else to do."

"That's the spirit."

...

Quinn was not dressing up. Hell no. Although she did spruce herself up to get into the mood.

She had not expected to be partying her first night away. She thought she'd be in bed wishing the week away instead. And as for Tom, she hadn't decided whether he was a blessing or a curse yet. She supposed she'd soon find out.

"Hey, gorge." Tom said from his spot leaning on the wall opposite her suite's door.

"Hey, beaut." Quinn grinned.

In fairness, Tom had grown on her throughout the day, they'd gone and eaten lunch together before splitting up so she could go and nap.

Her mom had made a fuss over her sore skin but it wasn't too bad by the time evening rolled around. Getting ready in the mirror she noticed how her freckles had made an appearance too. She wondered what Santana would make of them.

"May I?" Tom offered his arm.

Quinn pressed a hand to her chest and gasped, "What a gentleman." She took his arm and they made their way down the hall.

"I've been meaning to ask since you mentioned her, who's this better half I know so little of?"

"Better half? Don't tell her that, she'd take it and run a mile," Quinn couldn't help the bashful smile that took over her face. "Her name's -"

"Wait. Don't tell me. It's Beth right?" He pointed to Quinn's wrist.

"No, no. That's somebody else." She lightly thumbed over the name. "My girlfriend's name is Santana."

"Santana. Santana." Tom rolled the name around in his mouth. "Why does she even sound hot?"

"Because she is. Here," Quinn slipped her phone out of her back pocket and scrolled through her most recent pictures. Some were kind of embarrassing so she tilted her screen away until she found the perfect one. It was from Winter Formal; Quinn had her arm over Santana's shoulder as Santana pressed her face against hers, her smile as wide as Quinn's. The picture had Quinn smiling all over again. "Take a look. No scrolling."

"Okay, okay." Tom took the phone and let out a low whistle. "Looking fine," Quinn left it in his hands for a little too long as he started to flick through the rest of her phone's album. "Ooo, bitch. This one is saucy."

"Tom!" Quinn snatched the phone out of his hand and smacked his arm.

"Ow, bitch. I'm delicate."

"I'll give you delicate."

"Is this how you treat all the boys?"

"Only you."

"Oh, I'm honoured. Come on."

…

Quinn thought her suite was fancy. Garrett's was on another level.

It could have easily been mistaken for a house with a sea view. Only now the huge panes of glass gave way to a sea of blackness that both amazed and frightened Quinn. Lounging on the top deck she didn't really take the time to look out across the sea. To see nothing, not a light, was jarring.

"Snazzy, huh?" Tom nudged her.

"Uh-huh." Quinn continued to scope the place out, there was a set of stairs leading up to a second floor that overlooked the bottom level. There were a few rooms that led off to bedrooms and bathrooms, but she couldn't be sure which was which.

There were people dotted about the bottom floor, some on the central couches, others standing around the kitchen island and bar.

The longer she looked the more she didn't understand what she was supposed to be missing. What was so amazing that they had to be here? It didn't seem any more exciting that the parties she usually went to. Actually, it seemed way less exciting. The music was thumping, but most of the people in attendance weren't dancing or pounding drinks. Maybe these kids just didn't know how to party.

"Quinn!"

Quinn's head snapped toward the voice calling her and saw Garrett making his way towards her and Tom.

"Hi, how are you?"

"Better now that you're here." Quinn barely stopped herself from rolling her eyes. "No?" Garrett laughed. "Here let me introduce you."

He led Tom and her toward the group at the bar and went through each person, giving Quinn names that she almost immediately forgot. How was anybody meant to remember anybody at these things?

However, she did remember one and that was only because she looked similar to Santana, her eyes kept drawing back to her as the group broke out into conversation after introductions were done with. Her name was Reina and she had an accent when she spoke. Quinn tried to listen more intently when she did to pick up on it but had no luck.

Garrett handed them both a drink he'd made, and made a cheers. He was more bearable in groups. Who'd have thought?

The drink was nice, really nice. It probably helped it was the expensive stuff. It certainly went down a lot easier than the lighter fluid Puck supplied the usual parties with.

Comfortable with being on the periphery of the conversation, Quinn continued to sip at the drink Garrett had given her and found herself enjoying the stories to which she had no context for. The conversation and jokes were flowing quite nicely, and the anxieties she had about joining a party where everybody but her knew each other were alleviated. Tom being by her side helped too, especially since he seemed to be quite the charmer and had no trouble winning them over.

If there ever was a human embodiment of a social butterfly, she knew Tom would be it.

She would have never had thought he was some outcast among the filthy rich offspring of the filthy rich parents that made trips like this just because they could. She supposed she was one of those rich kids too. How rich now that her dad had nothing to do with her? She wasn't sure. And honestly, she didn't want to know.

Quinn tried to shake the thought from her mind and made an effort to regain some footing in story Tom was sharing, smiling when he looked to her, his eyes shining with the mirth of a man who knew something nobody else did. He really had them all like putty in the palm of his hand and she couldn't help but chuckle at how much he was loving it.

…

It had been about half an hour when Quinn's concerns that the party would be a bust were alleviated by a sudden burst of activity from the group by the couch. Yelling broke out and somebody was tossed over the table in the middle of the floor, knocking everything off of it. She thought fists were about to be thrown when the throwee leapt up with a laugh that set off the rest of them.

Tom awkwardly joined them and bumped Quinn's arm as though to ask her what the fuck was going on. Hell if she knew. The atmosphere had shifted into what she imagined a frat party was like, the boys became more boisterous and the girls were dancing more wildly.

And then Reina took a hold of her wrist.

Quinn gave her a questioning look, but she only got a sweet smile in response as she was pulled toward one of the rooms away from the main party. Quinn quickly felt behind her and grabbed for Tom's hand. To her relief he took it. Not that she needed a chaperone, but she felt safer with him around.

As they reached the door Reina gave a few knocks that triggered giggling from behind it. Reina turned back to them and let out a low laugh. "They won't be long." As they waited Quinn couldn't help staring. This girl really did look like Santana. And that accent, it must've been Australian. "See something you like?"

"Huh?" Quinn choked out in embarrassment. "No! I mean, you're gorgeous of course, it's just that you look like somebody I know."

Tom, who was still a little drunk from earlier leaned in. "Oh yeah, I see it."

Reina furrowed her brow in confusion. "Thanks, I think."

"Oh no, yeah. It's a total compliment, cross my heart and hope to die." Tom motioned a cross across his body.

The door opened then and three girls and a guy came fumbling out, the guy bringing up the rear and stopping short of Reina before whispering something to her and handing her a small tin.

"Thanks," Reina said.

The three of them slipped in right after and Reina told Tom to lock the door.

The bathroom was coloured white and gold, it would have been tacky if it wasn't so impressive. The wall that backed the sink was one big mirror, its overall reflective sheen was marred by two handprint smudges that Quinn could only guess how they got there. She knew what Santana wouldn't have hesitated to vocalise said guesses. And the bathtub was nothing less of a hot tub - six people could have happily fit in.

Her perusing was interrupted by Reina cracking the tin open and dusting the counter by the sink. "Those arseholes spilt their drink. I hope you don't mind a sticky surface." She looked over her shoulder to give Tom and Quinn a smirk.

Reina tipped the tin and tapped out a white powder that had Quinn raising her eyebrows. She felt kind of dumb. Why else would a stranger at a party invite you into the bathroom? Actually, she supposed there were many answers to that question, most of which made her think of Santana once again.

Quinn eyed Tom who didn't seem fazed at all. Reina pulled a card out of her bra and began cutting lines, Quinn had seen people ride the rail plenty of times before but she'd never sought them out to join herself.

"Just a bump to start the night right, aye." Reina then pulled out a crisp note and rolled it, handing it to Quinn once she'd done. "Ladies first." She said with a wink.

Quinn was not drunk enough for this. She looked back to Tom and he nodded to her.

_Fuck it._

She pushed the thought of the germs on the note from her mind and snorted the thinnest line on the counter, coughing slightly at the tickle she felt at the back of her throat. She resisted the urge to physically gag at the sensation, scrunched her nose and then passed the note to Reina who quickly followed suit, no hesitation.

Tom showed as little reservation as Reina, Quinn supposed this was his scene too. He gave her a huge grin in the mirror and it made her heart jolt in anticipation. What was she getting herself into?

Reina licked her finger to gather the remnants of what was left on the side and rubbed it into her gums. The sight made Quinn's lip twitch. "Waste not, want not, hey."

Quinn followed Tom and Reina back out into the party, the whole space felt different, the lights were dimmed and the music sounded, felt, louder. The nerves from earlier about hanging with a bunch of strangers spiked, but settled when Tom handed her another drink.

The buzz rushing through her body made her want to move, she gripped her cup tighter and ran her tongue over her teeth. The realisation that she had a lot of energy made her almost laugh. So this was what this was about?

Feeling antsy and eager to dance she quickly finished her drink and slammed the empty cup down before dragging Tom into the centre of the room where the table was still knocked over and others were giggling and falling over each other to sit down.

Closing her eyes she tried to feel the music.

"I love this song." She said through a smile.

"You do?" Tom replied.

Quinn opened one of her eyes and felt the threat of a laugh climbing from her chest. "No." It got the better of her and she began laughing, "I've never even heard this song before."

When she opened her eyes and saw Tom's confused look it only served to set her off again.

"I'll be right back." Tom squeezed her arm and she nodded.

Continuing to dance she pulled up a couple who were making out on the couch.

Luckily, they didn't seem to mind.

"You smell really good. What is that?" Quinn asked the girl half of the couple.

The mundane conversation felt important, Quinn was intently listening as she detailed her trip to the mall and how she went to so many different stores.

"... and it was so worth it." The stranger said.

"Oh my god, totally. So worth it." Quinn nodded.

Tom returned with another drink in hand, Quinn thanked him and they gradually drifted out of the group of dancers that had accumulated.

"I don't even feel anything," Quinn said after a minute.

"You've never done it before?" Tom questioned.

"No?"

"Quinn! Oh my days. I'm a bad influence." Tom cried with as though he was the star of his very own soap opera.

"You weren't dragging me into the bathroom and honestly, it's not a big deal." Quinn laughed.

"Really? Not feeling on the verge of strangling me? Or thinking I'm plotting your death?" Quinn shook her head. That satisfied Tom well enough. "Oh. Had me worried there." He wiped the bead of sweat that was slipping down his forehead.

"Sounds like you've had some experience."

"Girl, you wouldn't believe."

Quinn felt stuck between sober and drunk. She certainly wasn't sober, but she felt like she was in some sort of limbo. Maybe drinking more would help - said nobody in the right state of mind, ever.

"I like you, Tom." Quinn placed a hand on one of Tom's biceps, he felt unbelievably warm.

Tom looked into her eyes for a long second, a little too long. And to her dread, Tom began to lean in.

"No, no, no." She said quickly, her words tumbling over each other as she pulled back.

Tom released a sputtering laugh, puckering his lips once more when he calmed down.

He was making fun of her. "Bitch, I'm kidding!"

Quinn looked at him in shock and then amusement. "Tom! I thought I had you pegged all wrong for a second."

"You can peg me any time, honey." Tom wrapped his lips around the straw of his drink in an overtly sexual way and gave her a slow wink.

"Oh my god," Quinn playfully shoved him. "You know I'm taken."

He gave a pout, "You don't know what you're missing."

"I'm sure I'll live." He continued to give her what she assumed was his come-hither look. "If you carry on I'm leaving."

"Quinn," he whined, "I'm sorry, please forgive me. Don't abandon me and leave me with all the straight people."

"Fine, but behave."

"Yes, Miss." Quinn rolled her eyes.

Much of the night was spent consuming stupid amounts of alcohol and causing mischief with Tom. Her sides ached for having laughed so much, she felt stupidly and wonderfully silly throughout the night and it was great.

She may have also indulged in a little more than the alcohol.

The discreetness that was held to at the beginning of the party was no longer a worry as people tapped and cut out line after line. The table had been righted and the lounge the epicentre for debauchery.

Quinn didn't even know if it mattered if she'd been drinking, all she knew was that she could still run riot with Tom and that was all that mattered. Garrett had gotten in on the fun, his lack of inhibitions breaking down that smarmy front he put on in every other interaction he'd had with Quinn. He was kind of a doofus. _Doofus._ The thought of the word had her laughing into the back of his shirt (which he had miraculously kept on) as the three of them lay like sardines in the tub, a towel on top of them, waiting for somebody to come in to receive the scare of their life.

...

Some time had passed and Quinn had taken the time to escape and take a break out on the balcony. The sea breeze felt strange in the face of the eternal darkness that was the sea and sky in front of her. It felt like it was coming from nowhere and everywhere.

And then she looked up. She thought there was no light outside, but she was mistaken. She'd never seen so many stars in the sky.

The beauty and vastness of it all had her welling up. There was so much she'd never seen before. So much she had never experienced. And soon she'd have to decide what she wanted to do and be. It all felt like too much.

"Quinn." Tom was calling her name from the sliding door. "You coming back inside?"

Quinn took a second to wipe her eyes and plastered on a smile. "Yeah."

...

The vessel they were on could've been in the middle of a storm with the way Quinn's world was spinning. She had made it back to her suite it seemed, but not her bed. She lay face-first on the cool tile of the bathroom.

After a breather she tried to push herself up, her elbows buckling as a fresh wave of nausea hit her.

"Oh no. Please, no." She pleaded with her body. She really didn't want to vomit.

"We're docking today, Quinn!" She heard her Judy call from somewhere. "Where are you?"

Quinn groaned. She lay back down and closed her eyes, hoping for the best. She hated being sick, so, so much.

"Is somebody feeling a little seasick?" Judy came into the bathroom, switching the light on much to Quinn's despair. "Oh, honey." She crouched down and rubbed Quinn's back for a few seconds. "Get changed, we're going to have some breakfast before we dock."

Quinn's response was heard more by the floor than her mother, but Judy didn't mind too much. She took the mumbles as confirmation that she'd be joining her and that was good enough for her. "I'll go see if they have those motion sickness bands at the store, I'll be back in ten." Judy then kissed the tips of her fingers and planted them on Quinn's forehead, soon leaving thereafter.

...

Feeling like death warmed over, Quinn thoroughly hated the day. She tried to perk herself up, but she really had to call it quits when the glass of rose placed in front of her at dinner had her heaving. It wasn't just the sight, but the smell as well.

She promised herself she was never drinking. Never. Never.

On the bright side, she and Judy were getting on quite well. Perhaps the sudden muteness that had overcome Quinn had a hand in helping the dynamic or maybe they were growing closer, either way, Quinn only had to worry about not losing her meagre breakfast during their excursions.

She didn't see Tom again that evening having skipped out on their evening meal altogether and taking to bed for the rest of the night. When she found him the next day they spent much of it together. In fact, they spent much of the week together.

Quinn was so glad she had somebody to talk to who wasn't her mother. Tom was an interesting guy, he was in senior year too, only unlike Quinn he had plans. He was going to some art college in Los Angeles, he told her it had the kind of art scene he wanted to work his way up in. She admired his ambition. When he asked her what she was going to do she told him she didn't know. He reassured her that she'd figure it out. She gave a noncommittal shrug.

They went to more parties, the first night having bridged the gap between Garrett and Tom apparently. She couldn't take all the credit, but she wouldn't say no to a thank you. Especially when one evening she walked into a bathroom to find them all over each other. She'd left them to it, taking with her the lesson that she should really learn to knock more and for longer in these situations.

Christmas had come and gone, it was bizarre to be celebrating while the sun was beating and no snow could be seen. The lack of expectation made it one of her favourite Christmases ever and before she knew it, it was their last day.

She'd worked up quite a nice tan, her lesson quickly learnt on the first day and her alcohol consumption tempered some. She did not have a repeat hangover like the last. Something she was pleased with.

And even though she'd had a good time, and definitely made a friend for life, she couldn't wait for it to be over. To finally see Santana and her friends.

...

Before the cruiser docked for the last time, they were having dinner with Tom's family. Tom had laughed at her apprehensiveness. "Are you asking my dad if you have permission to marry me or something?"

Quinn had bit her lip and shook her head, feeling silly for being nervous. She wondered what Maribel would make of her and Santana being together. She couldn't imagine how nervous she'd feel during that moment, assuming she'd be there.

Tom, Judy and Quinn arrived together and joined a gorgeous pair sat at a table. Tom could've gotten his infectious smile from either one of them. They were actually quite nice, he must have been exaggerating the when he said they were his prison guards. Then again, now knowing Tom, the exaggeration didn't surprise her.

The meal had been nice, the company even more so. Tom, forever the conversationalist, didn't shut up for the most part, but it made it a no less perfect end to her vacation. Out on the deck, soaking up the last bit of sun she was sure to see for a few months, Quinn sat quietly next to Tom and watched the waves trip over each other.

In the distance the coast could be seen, signalling the end and encouraging their goodbyes.

"We'll have to keep in touch," Quinn said first.

"We will. And I have to meet Santana one of these days, the way you went on about her sometimes. You'd think she was the second coming."

"I did not go on."

"I beg to differ."

Quinn crossed her arms and glared at him.

"Scary." Tom laughed and enveloped her into a hug, one she eventually returned.

...

Quinn tried to sleep for the majority of the trip back to Lima. She thought that the more she slept, the quicker time would pass and the quicker she'd be able to see Santana. When she had gotten her feet on steady ground she sent a text telling Santana she was back on land and that she'd text her when she was close.

Judy and Quinn caught their ride to the airport, Judy making good use of Quinn as she had her heave her bags into the car. Thankfully, the driver had given her a hand so she didn't have to break too much of a sweat.

They were cutting it close with their flights, but what was life without a little risk?

She was sure the sight of herself and Judy sprinting (or at least trying to) to their gate was something to behold. Quinn resembling a pack mule and Judy panting like a hunter had taken a gun to her and punctured a lung.

Despite all that, they made it in the end.

Quinn made sure to nab the window seat before Judy could steal it away once they'd finally boarded and they settled in with refreshments. But other than that, Quinn had no interest in a movie or any light and boring patter with Judy. Instead, she simply slipped her eye mask on and dreamt the hours it'd take away.

"Quinny." A cooing whisper attempted to rouse her.

Had they landed? Sleep was so good though. Quinn told herself she'd wake up in just a second.

"Inasec." She mumbled.

Ten minutes later Judy was shaking her awake. "Come on now, Quinn."

Shocked awake, Quinn quickly sat from her slouched position against the window. Her hair thoroughly bed-head worthy and that dried patch of drool by her mouth? No such thing. She had _never_ drooled in her life. Obviously.

Back on the road, she'd be arriving in Lima in no time. Just as she was about to start a text she decided to just call instead. So what if they'd see each other in person soon. She wanted to hear her girlfriend's voice.

On the second ring it connected.

"Santana," Quinn whispered.

"Quinn," Santana whispered back.

Hearing her name had a big, fat grin spreading across her face. "Hey." Her voice was still quiet, but the excited tremor was noticeable.

"Are you nearly here?"

"Yeah, twenty minutes tops."

"Why are we whispering?" The amusement in Santana's voice was apparent.

Quinn couldn't believe herself but she giggled like a little school girl. She was unbelievably smitten.

"Will you be waiting for me?"

"Uh-huh."

...

"Uhngh-" Quinn grunted, too far gone to be bothered about being embarrassed.

"God I've missed you," Santana's words came hot and wet, her mouth pressed against the nape of Quinn's neck. Her fingers slick and firm as they pressed against Quinn's walls before torturously dragging out again, the motion repeated until Quinn writhed beneath her.

"San-" Quinn panted, her legs and arms wrapped around her girlfriend's body. Her desperate moans encouraging Santana to give her some leeway in the way of picking up the pace - the sound of skin meeting skin that much louder and frantic.

As soon as Quinn arrived home and they were finally reunited a palpable tension overcame them. Judy's presence making their need to be close that much more enticing and exciting. The longing looks and prolonged contact as Quinn handed Santana one of her bags to help her carry her things inside causing a fire to burn deep within Quinn. A fire that would only get brighter before it could be put out.

"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." Quinn's nails dug into Santana's back as she arched into her. She was so close. Stupidly so. Her mouth tried to tell Santana to never stop but couldn't quite bring itself to do so.

Soft kisses were peppered along her jaw, her neck, her chest, every meeting of flesh had her head swimming, not a coherent thought could be found sloshing around inside her skull. And then Santana's teeth bit down on her collarbone and she came around the fingers inside of her.

Santana didn't move her hand immediately, no. Instead, she resumed her kisses as Quinn's thighs trembled. When the trembles subsided she pulled out only to glide her fingers to Quinn's very sensitive clit.

As soon as contact was made Quinn's hips jolted and knocked Santana's hand back, making them both laugh.

Santana decided to rest her hand on her thigh instead, which only served to make her burn even hotter. By the glint in Santana's eye, she knew it too.

"I love you," Quinn said in her post-orgasm haze, reverence dripping from her words.

Santana's smirk melted into a coy smile, "You do?"

Quinn bit her lip, "Yeah." She said, drawing Santana's face closer with the intimacy of the whisper.

"Oh." Santana's breath ghosted Quinn's lips. "That's a relief because I love you too."

They smiled then at each other, their teeth meeting where their lips should have as they kissed, the clicking sound making them giggle.

"Lie back," Quinn instructed as she ran her thumb over Santana's bottom lip.

And she did.

"Now I could just thank you, but I think I have a better way to repay your good deed." Quinn continued, moving to straddle Santana's hips.

Santana looked up at her, a shiver on anticipation running through her. "Oh yeah?"

Quinn took her wrists and brought them up above her head so that her fingertips brushed the headboard. "Oh." Quinn leaned in close and nibbled at her ear, making Santana squirm. "Yeah."

...

Santana had been burning a hole in the pavement the whole time she had been waiting for Quinn, her nervous energy manifested into her pacing for what could have been an hour but was more like ten minutes.

When they could finally find a moment alone no words were shared, not until they were stripped bare, their need for each other urgent and raw. Everything else could wait for this moment. The moment they came back together, reconnected and found each other again.

To have Quinn back, head between her thighs no less, was a dream.

Fully sated and some time later they lay staring into each other's eyes.

"We're so gay."

Quinn laughed into her pillow and shyly peeked out not a second later. "So gay."

"Quinn," Santana said as she drew her fingers over Quinn's ribs.

"Yes, Santana."

"I have a proposal for you."

Quinn shifted to fully face Santana, her eyes widening. "What?"

"Don't worry, I don't have a ring up my ass to give you, I promise." Santana took one of Quinn's hand in hers and held it to her breast, her heart. "I have a lot to tell you, but the biggest thing I need to ask you is this." She took a deep breath, sure that her thudding heart could be felt by Quinn. "Would you come to California with me? This summer I mean. It'd be after graduation of course and before we go to New York, we can plan the stops, book a room here and there so we don't have to suffer the backseat of my car every night. Be together before life sweeps us up. Before the world chews us up and spits us out."

She paused, aware she was getting away with herself.

"Well?" Her eyes flicked between Quinn's, looking for any sign of hesitation.

To her relief she found none.

"Of course."

Santana's face split into a huge grin, pure elation creasing the corners of her eyes and making them shine with unshed tears.

She took Quinn's face and planted kisses all over making the other girl laugh and roll onto her back.

"I'd love to." Quinn murmured against her lips as she kissed her there.

It was so earnest and heartfelt that her heart ached for all the love she had for Quinn.

"Thank you."

Santana closed the gap between them once more, their mouths meeting with the quiet understanding of two people against the world.


	14. Growing Up

The past six months had been a whirlwind.

On the night they'd finally come back together, Santana had spilled her guts. With her eyes still bleary from the sleep they'd fallen into after their promises to take a trip together, she told Quinn what had happened whilst she was gone. Quinn had remained as quiet as the night as she listened, comforting Santana when the emotion got the better of her.

But there was relief in her words that told Quinn more than the words themselves ever could. Santana could be herself and within those six months she'd come to gradually embrace her sexuality and relationship, openly, with Quinn.

That self-assuredness and confidence saw her accepted into NYU, the college she'd set her sights on. The day she had received her letter she'd been snappy with Quinn, the more she prolonged the inevitable the more antsy she got.

It got to the point where Quinn couldn't stand her ridiculousness anymore and offered to read it for her. Santana had agreed; her palms and underboob slick with sweat. She'd really worked herself up into a nervous wreck.

As Quinn slid her finger through the sealed envelope she caught Santana chewing her lip, her anxious energy projecting onto herself. But unlike Santana, she wasn't anxious about whether Santana had gotten in or not. No. For that she could have told Santana months prior. She was getting in. She could have gone to Columbia if she really wanted. What Quinn was nervous about were her own prospects.

Santana had asked her about her plans, her mom had asked her, hell, the whole club had asked her. And each and every time she'd plaster on a smile and tell them she had some ideas.

What a lie. She hadn't even bothered to apply. And by the time it had gotten to graduation she was too chicken shit to tell Santana, or anybody for that matter, that she was a failure.

"You got in." She'd said, for her words to be echoed in disbelief, then elation, by Santana.

That was a good night. Probably one of the best.

Quinn was so unbelievably proud of Santana; of how much she'd grown, of how driven and ambitious she was.

They'd celebrated alone and they'd celebrated with their friends. Everybody in New Directions was getting ready for their futures, whether they were to be in Lima or not. It was all go.

Everybody had their seatbelts on, the domino of clicks, excited for the ride to start. When all Quinn could see was that her seatbelt wasn't there, she wasn't strapped in, she wasn't secure. She wasn't ready. The ride operator was giving them all the thumbs up. "You ready?" The operator would ask and they'd let out a cheer that couldn't quite make its way past Quinn's lips.

Even Sue had approached her and informed her she was moving to Texas to coach a team worth her time, her parting hug filled with the reassurance and comfort she needed but didn't know what to do with.

"You'll be alright, kid." She'd said with a final squeeze to her shoulder.

...

Senior prom came around and she spent a stupid amount on flowers for Santana, Maribel had given her a warm smile when she opened the door to a face full of roses instead of the shy smile of Quinn's she was expecting.

Quinn had thought it cliché she'd got roses but red was Santana's colour, it was a no brainer. And anyway, Santana almost cried at the sight so she couldn't care less what anybody else thought.

"Aw, you've got her crying over flowers!" Lucia laughed from the banister midway up the stairs.

"Shut up," Santana choked out as she took the roses from Quinn. "I've never gotten flowers before."

As soon as Quinn saw the chin start to wobble she kissed Santana's cheek, lightly thumbing the lipstick she'd left away. "Well it's an honour to be the first."

"Oh, girls," Maribel gushed. "Come on, come on. Let me take a picture. Lucia, get my good camera from my dresser!"

"Ugh. Really?"

"Yes, now go get," Maribel snapped her fingers.

Lucia grumbled and made a show of being hard done by, but when she looked Quinn's way she gave her a sly wink and shot up the stairs to fetch the camera.

Santana had broken the news to Lucia about her dad the second day she was back home. To say she was scandalised would have been an understatement.

Never one to let heavy news bring her down, Lucia remained true to her flair for the dramatics. She gasped, she cussed out their abuela from the safety of her bedroom, she hugged Santana until she couldn't breathe. She had Santana's back. And Santana never once doubted it.

"Mercedes is here," Santana said, taking Quinn's hand in hers so that their forearms touched. "You ready?"

Quinn's eyes roamed Santana's face, from her long lashes above deep brown eyes to her plump, red lips. If there ever was such a thing as perfection, she was pretty sure Santana was it.

"I'm so lucky to have you as my girlfriend."

Santana's expectant gaze softened and her lips spread into a smile, "God, Quinn. If you wanted in my pants all you had to do was ask."

Quinn laughed and nudged her, "Idiot."

"You love it."

"Hmm." Quinn furrowed her brow.

It was Santana's turn to laugh as she nudged her back, "Cute. Real cute. C'mon."

Maribel, who had been chatting with Mercedes and Sam out by the car, waved them over as she saw them step out onto the front.

"Why do people do that?" Santana asked.

"Do what?"

"Wave when we're very obviously going in that direction."

"One of life's many questions. Right up there with the meaning of life."

"Okay, smartass."

Quinn apologised in the form of a peck to the back of the hand she was holding.

"You guys look so good!" Mercedes complimented, pulling Quinn into a hug as soon as they reached her.

"'Cedes, divine as ever. And Sam, you're looking very handsome."

"Thank you. Thank you very much." He replied a la Elvis, the tips of his ears burning red when Mercedes giggled at his impression.

Mercedes and Sam had eventually made it official just before they went on to perform at Nationals. Mercedes had been a flustered mess the week prior and had been asking Quinn a whole manner of questions to garner whether Sam like-liked her. Like, duh. Quinn had used more words than that but it wasn't until they were about to go on stage that Sam pulled Mercedes to the side and popped the "Will you go out with me?" question. Mercedes' smile lit up the auditorium the whole performance, Quinn couldn't have been happier to see her dearest friend pour her soul into their performance, not for the sadness or pain of life, but the laughter and love it was capable of.

They'd won. And don't tell Rachel, but Quinn would have bet her money on Mercedes being the reason they did. She had told Santana just as much later that evening. She'd agreed after rinsing Quinn for compliments for her own contributions.

"You were amazing."

"Amazing? Do tell me more."

"Phenomenal."

"Mhmm."

Quinn had inched her face closer and closer to Santana's until their noses were touching.

"Breathtaking," she whispered, pecking Santana on the nose afterward.

"So were you."

The flash of the camera pulled their attention, Santana's most of all.

"Lucia, could you please warn me beforehand? I've not exactly had the best experience with surprise photos."

"Geez Louise, would you get a load of this one?" Lucia spoke out of the side of her mouth. "It's a candid, Santana. How else am I meant to get them?"

"Stick your candids."

"Santana!" Maribel chastised.

"Fine! At least get my good side."

They'd piled in and hitched their ride to McKinley. Their plan was to meet the rest of the club in the parking lot. It was rather reminiscent of the last dance they'd had, minus the biting cold.

Brittany was the first the embrace them. She was another Santana had gone to after the fallout of her coming out. She'd cried when Santana told her about the photo and what Alma had said. It only set Santana off all over again; it was never nice to see Brittany cry.

"Oh, San," she whimpered, "I'm so sorry, I didn't even think."

"Hey," Santana tipped Brittany's chin up with her finger so she'd look her in the eye. "I didn't come to blame, shout or even cry… again." Santana laughed through her own tears, pointing to them and rolling her eyes at herself, getting a small chuckle out of Brittany. "I came to tell my best friend about something important that had happened. That through everything, you're somebody who I still trust and depend on, somebody who I value and love."

Brittany gave her a watery smile. "I should be cheering you up," she laughed again as more tears rolled down her cheeks.

"We're a mess."

"Yeah," they smiled each other. Brittany was the first to move in for the hug and she held Santana tight. "Don't worry about Abuela, it's hard for old people to change. It's something to do with their brain's having to catch up from being trapped in the past. It's a real time capsule up there. Once she hits the twenty-first century she'll come around. I just know it. And say I'm wrong and she doesn't. Screw her. Cause you're awesome."

Santana muffled her hybrid laugh-cry into Brittany's shoulder.

Still in the hug, she turned her head to rest it there, "Thanks, Britt-Britt."

"Anytime, San."

Not one to be left unnoticed for long, Rachel made sure to sweep Santana up next - her sudden embrace making Santana laugh in surprise.

"Watch the hands, Berry."

"Shut up."

Rachel was another person in Santana's life who had only gotten closer with time, the dance lessons became just another thing they did together outside of school. There was no embarrassment there to call Rachel one of her best friends. Especially after Christmas. Rachel had checked in on her daily for two weeks straight after that night.

That was kind of cool of her Santana had to admit.

The gravel crunched under their feet, more car doors could be heard slamming as other students pooled out of their rides to greet friends, and the sound of music could be heard blasting from a car racing into the parking lot.

It was Puck.

He hopped out and went racing over to the group looking dishevelled.

"Hey." He greeted everybody, nodding to Quinn as he passed his gaze over everybody.

Quinn nodded back, "Hey."

"We ready to get into this bitch or what? Artie, you still playing bait?" Puck said.

"Playing what now?" Artie replied.

With everyone there they all took their sweet time making their way inside. Busy fawning over their outfits and the fact this was their senior prom, guys!

The gym had been transformed into a jungle, paper vines hung from the ceiling and various wild animals were dispersed around the hall. When Brittany saw the gorilla statue she immediately ran up to it and posed so Artie could take a picture of her with it.

Santana looked over to Quinn and raised her eyebrows in question, "Want to hug the gorilla, Quinn?"

Quinn side-eyed Santana in response as they began to make their way to the punch hand-in-hand with Quinn leading the way.

"No? I'll take that as a no." She snickered.

Kurt was already at the table, Blaine was with him and grabbing them both a drink. Blaine had pretty much become another member of the group. Whenever they hung out outside of school if Kurt was there Blaine was bound to make an appearance. Santana liked him well enough; Rachel had taken a special shining to him which Santana, of course, teased her relentlessly over. The infatuation didn't last though much to Kurt's relief, Rachel had since set her sights on Broadway and Broadway only. Boys be damned.

Santana had mad respect for that.

"Punch, ladies?" Blaine asked as they approached.

"Yes, please." Quinn smiled.

Kurt took a sip from his drink as he scanned the gym which was steadily filling with other students. "You guys are going away this summer, right?"

"Yeah," Santana chirped, "I finally got around to getting the brake pads fixed on my little baby so we should be set."

"Your little baby?" He quirked an eyebrow.

"Yes, my little baby."

Quinn tried and failed to hide her amusement.

"What?" Santana turned to her. "She is! We've been through a lot together."

"She?" He continued.

"Listen, Hummel. You can't make fun of me for shit. Not with those shoes you've dared to wear in public."

Kurt gasped. "Excuse me, these are couture." He twisted his foot around by the tip of the boot, the shiny material reflecting the light of the huge disco ball hanging above the middle of the gym.

"Whatever. Do you want to know about the trip or not?" Without waiting for a reply, she continued. "So we're pretty much packed and have most things ready. I've spoken with my dad over the phone a couple of times."

"How're you feeling about meeting him for the first time?" Blaine asked.

Santana shrugged her shoulders, "Excited, I guess? It's kind of strange over the phone." She glanced to Quinn and leaned into her touch at the small of her back. "Either way, it'll be a vacation for us two." She would have added that no matter what happened as long as Quinn was with her she'd be okay, but being too soft in front of other's wasn't really her style - if she could help it.

Quinn gave her a soft smile, her eyes telling her she understood what wasn't said.

They'd planned their trip and had worked out it'd take five days if they took regular stops, maybe a little longer. They'd be staying with her dad for a couple of weeks, then it'd be back home and then New York.

After a shaky start to the year, Santana was glad to say she felt ready for what came next - packing all her shit up aside.

When Santana would titter on about the apartments in New York she'd found that weren't too pricey nor too alike a rat den Quinn would listen intently trying to imagine their how their dreams would align. How they'd align when Quinn wasn't sure she had any dreams.

Graduation soon rolled around, making the impending future all that much more real. Caps were thrown and many tears were shed. Quinn watched her cap reach almost as high as Finn's - and he had a height advantage.

Maybe Sue was right. Maybe she would be alright after all.

Santana had rushed up on her and lifted her into a spin that had her head falling back in laughter. Her bright red lips so kissable and perfect. Call it an inkling, call it a felling, call it anything you'd like. All that Quinn knew for certain was that summer was going to be life changing.

...

The after-party was full of hugging and laughing. Rachel's house was taking some damage, but she was enjoying herself too much to care. She was sat with Quinn and Santana at the back of the stage in her basement as the others danced in the centre of the room.

Santana had just taken another shot when she heaved.

"Santana! No!" Quinn shouted, covering her own mouth.

"Qui-" another heave.

"Oh my fucking god." Quinn turned away and squeezed her eyes shut. If Santana was sick, she'd definitely hurl too.

The sound of Santana coughing behind her drew her back around. "Fuck me. Jesus." Santana patted her chest. "Might have to rela- relax on that one." She choked.

Quinn looked at her girlfriend's nonchalant expression and slow blinks after the near-vomit experience and laughed at the state they were all in.

She laughed so hard her cheeks flushed even pinker than they already were. Santana crawled over to her and cupped them in her hands. Quinn could just make out her confused smile through her eyes that were blurry from tears.

"Wha's so funny?" Santana pouted as Quinn's chuckling went on. "Quinn, pwease."

"Pwease?" Rachel cackled, earning a glare from Santana who still held Quinn's face hostage.

Santana now had two people laughing at her. She was not pleased.

Letting Quinn go and crossing her arms over her chest she leaned back, "Fine!"

"S," Quinn said sweetly and opened her arms for Santana to return to her.

And she did after only a small show of resistance.

Due to her lack of bearing she essentially launched herself across the distance and knocked Quinn on her back.

Rachel paid them no mind. Her main priority was to eye potential karaoke candidates.

"So sleepy." Santana mumbled into Quinn's neck.

Quinn hummed in response, revelling in the warmth of Santana's body.

The wind was soon knocked out of them both when Brittany came rushing over to them and sat on Santana's back.

"Wake up, sleepyheads!" She bounced up and down, falling backwards into Rachel who hadn't noticed her and yelped.

When Brittany stood she pulled Rachel up with her, dragging her away to the next thing to capture her attention - which happened to be a distressed Finn who had spilt his drink down himself and was being laughed at by Mike and Puck.

"Ow, my back."

"Ow, my front." Quinn mimicked.

Santana released a puff of air in lieu of an actual laugh. Her body relaxed and loose on top of Quinn's, the drowsiness that had been creeping up on her all night had caught up with her.

"You're like, the best pillow. Ever."

"Oh my gosh, thank you so much," Quinn drawled teasingly.

"You're welcome," Santana responded with all sincerity.

The noise of the room around them had soon faded into the background. What Quinn focused on was the person in her arms. The smell of her hair, her perfume, the length of her eyelashes.

She kind of needed to pee but she could hold it.

"I love you, San."

Just when she thought Santana had fallen asleep completely she heard a quiet but clear, "I love you too." Then the breath hitting her neck evened and the body on top of her felt a little heavier.

She'd be alright. They'd be alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This is where I'm up to til now. Til next time, baaaayybee.


	15. Movin' On West

**Day One**

Santana could see her mom and sister waving her goodbye through her rear-view mirror. She smiled in return despite them not being able to see. Quinn, however, was leaning out the window and doing enough waving for the both of them.

Quinn plopped back into her seat with a soft thump.

Her hair was windswept from hanging out of the window and she had a cowlick that no matter how much Quinn patted or flattened it, it just wouldn't stay stuck down. Santana bit her lip to stop herself from laughing at Quinn's growing frustration.

"Watch the road," Quinn admonished.

Caught, Santana returned her gaze to the road in front of her, her mouth still upturned in amusement.

A growl from her right tempted her to look once more but she daren't push her luck so early on into their very long drive.

"Why?" Quinn whined. Out of the corner of her eye, Santana saw her pouring a small puddle of water from one of their many bottles of water into the palm of her hand to dampen the unruly spot of hair.

A flick of water landed on Santana's cheek and an aggravated groan followed. Okay, she couldn't resist. She took a quick glance and saw the hair was now wet and miserable as well as defiant.

Hazel eyes snapped toward her and Santana's eyes widened, her breath shortening from resisting the urge to laugh and the intensity of the glare.

"Don't," Quinn uttered through her teeth.

"What?" She asked, feigning innocence.

Quinn squinted at her and sat back in a huff.

"Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed," Santana said under her breath, though purposely loud enough for Quinn to clearly hear.

"I couldn't sleep. I just kept tossing and turning the whole night."

"Yes, I'm aware." Santana raised an eyebrow at Quinn.

If Santana was hoping to get some remorse out of Quinn she was out of luck. "Yeah, well I was too hot."

"You sure it wasn't sharing a bed with me that had you all hot and bothered?"

"No." Quinn was not amused.

"Oh," Santana passed Quinn her aux to connect her phone, "well until you figure out what has your panties in a twist how about you bang on my road trip playlist."

Quinn took Santana's phone before pausing, "You don't have a road trip playlist."

Santana clicked her tongue, "Well that, Quinn, is where you're mistaken."

Flicking through Santana's music Quinn came upon the playlist in question, "Let me guess. Is it 'driving Quinny crazy'? When'd you make this?"

"Like two days ago. If we were going to prep we had to go all out, right? So your girl has sorted us both out and blessed us with music _taste_." Santana emphasised the last word so much so it had a comical effect, it was kind of what she was going for to get Quinn out of her bad-hair-day funk. "Take a look. See anything in particular that picks your fancy?"

Santana continued to focus on the road as she let Quinn peruse her superb music selection when she heard a scoffed laugh she snuck a look at her girlfriend. The grin on Quinn's face made her own appear.

"Find it?"

Quinn looked at her then, all shy smile and cute. Santana actually wished for once in her life for traffic so she could lean over and kiss the girl she loved.

The familiar intro to _Yes Sir_ began to play and Santana swayed in her seat, exaggeratedly singing along.

Quinn groaned in embarrassment, especially when Santana had begun to turn it up. Her breaking point came when they'd pulled up to a red light and the people in the car next to them peered over. She covered her face and could hear the laughter slipping through the lyrics as Santana continued to sing.

She'd have denied it in the moment due to raging embarrassment, but Quinn kind of loved that Santana had gone so far to prepare music for their adventure, especially since it was a big thing for Santana. The way Santana so easily included her in all of her plans frightened her sometimes, but it made her feel loved in a way she'd never been loved before.

…

They'd been driving for a good seven hours when they came to their first stop in St. Louis, or somewhere very near if the signs were right. This is where they'd stop over and enjoy a decent meal that wasn't granola bars that got shit everywhere and had Santana whining about how messy Quinn was when eating.

"It's not my fault!"

"It's not my fault," Santana mocked as she stood in one of the countless gas station's they'd driven passed parking lot and wiped crumbs off the passenger seat onto the ground outside.

"Don't mock me," Quinn said through a laugh.

"Quinn, how did you do this? Did you eat any of it or did you want me to get rats on purpose?"

Now that had Quinn fully laughing, "Rats? Santana, I don't think rats are going to break into your car anytime soon."

"Laugh it up, 'cause when we have to bum it in here and you wake up in the middle of the night without a nose don't come to me crying about it."

"What? The rats eat living people now?"

"Yes."

Santana, fully having given up on tidying out the last few bits of granola, stood straight with her hands on her hips.

Quinn unconsciously matched her stance and they stared each other down.

"You'd seriously not help me if a rat ate my face?"

Santana crossed her arms and gasped, "I didn't say that. I said don't come crying, I'd still take you to the emergency room. And y'know," she relaxed her posture a little and leaned against her car, "I'd at least try and find the bastard who ate your nose."

Call her crazy, but Quinn thought that was quite chivalrous of Santana to say.

"Thanks," Quinn gave her a coy smile and shrugged a shoulder.

"C'mon, let's keep moving."

And they did.

Between that gas station and St Louis there was singing and blaring music, shared smiles and hands held. By the time they'd gotten back from their meal at a diner they came across in their meandering around town to the hotel they were staying at they were bone tired. Santana wasn't used to driving for longer than an hour at a time and Quinn was still a little grouchy for not having slept the night before. With a semi-comfortable place to sleep, once they reached their room they quickly disrobed and climbed under the covers of the double bed in the centre of the room.

"Night, San," Quinn murmured against Santana's neck from where she was tucked up against her body.

"Night, Q," Santana responded with a soft kiss to the top of Quinn's head.

Lay in the dark, Quinn already asleep on top of her, Santana smiled to herself.

…

**Day Two**

With a start, Santana shot up from her sleep. The unfamiliar surroundings making her heart drop before she remembered where she was and what she was doing.

"Yshou okshay?" Quinn's head popped out of the bathroom's open door, a toothbrush in her mouth.

"Yeah," she replied, her voice still groggy with sleep.

They'd soon gotten ready and were hitting the road, Quinn offering to drive this time and Santana readily agreeing so that she could sleep some more.

When she awakened, Quinn was humming along to the radio so she pretended to be asleep for a little longer so she could just listen.

"I know you're awake."

Santana ignored her and kept her eyes shut until she felt Quinn's hand find its way to her thigh to poke it.

"I'm not awake," she whined.

Quinn scoffed a laugh and continued to drive, her eyes flicking to Santana every now and then to see if she'd give up her act.

It wasn't long until Santana was messing with the buttons in the car and making Quinn wish she was actually back asleep, pretend or not.

"Can you not touch something for five minutes?"

"I don't know, can I?"

"What does that even mean?"

Santana pursed her lips in a moment of thought, "I'm not too sure."

Quinn rolled her eyes and spotted their turn-off. They would be slumming it in the car that evening, something that was a part of the road trip experience, or so Santana had gushed when they were planning their little trip.

The reality was Santana fidgeting the whole night because she couldn't get comfortable and Quinn almost crying because she didn't want to go to the bathroom outside. The missing creature comforts of home and the lack of having an actual bed were taking a toll and resulted in an argument and eventually, some make-up cuddles because "I'm not having sex at the side of a road, Santana."

…

**Day Three**

The third day into their trip started out with a few aches and pains, but soon they were laughing and singing along to the playlist Santana had made. They'd found a roadside diner and had a huge shared breakfast and coffee to make up for the not-so-great sleep.

Quinn shook her head in amused disapproval as Santana loaded hers with a shit tonne of sugar. A habit Quinn couldn't quite wrap her head around, especially since they were on the Cheerios and even looking at a candy bar was warrant enough for two laps around the track.

"What?" Santana asked as she glanced up from stirring her piping hot mug with a spoon.

"You know what," Quinn emphasised her point by looking pointedly at Santana's drink.

"We should do something fun tonight."

"Oh, yeah? What are you thinking?"

A mischievous smile graced Santana's lips, "I'm thinking we go to a club. An actual club that's not just a bar where old dudes gather and reminisce their glory days as high school hall monitor."

Quinn's eyebrow quirked in intrigue, "I'm liking the sound of this, do you have your ID?"

"Pfft? Do I? Of course, I always come prepared."

And prepared she was, they'd parked Santana's car in a 24-hour parking lot and did their best to tidy up and put on the best clothes they could be bothered to search around their bags for. They picked the first club they could find in the city that they couldn't remember the name of.

The bouncer definitely gave them a second-glance and a third, but seemed to shrug it off and let them in any way. They'd drank a few and were trying to enjoy themselves, but the older crowd and half-dead leers were enough to have them glancing in each other's direction and getting out of there.

"Fuck it," Santana had said, "let's get some shit wine and go get drunk in a field or something."

"What?" Quinn had laughed.

"I'm being serious, let's just go get fucked up."

"But what about driving tomorrow?"

"What about it?" Santana gave her a smile she couldn't resist and held out her hand.

"Fine," Quinn had sighed, but she wouldn't have had it any other way.

…

Two boxes of wine and a run-in with another travelling group later, Santana and Quinn were sat around a fire, the car parked under the cover of trees next to a camper that Harry, Evan and Lily were using to make their way to Florida.

"Blegh," Santana spat as she took another swig of the wine in her hand - still in the bag it came in, the box long since kicked into the fire. "It tastes like piss."

"Yes, as you've said ten times already," Quinn jibed, leaning into her girlfriend when she huffed, taking the wine off of her hands as she did.

"I can't believe you guys are only eighteen," Evan said between drags of his cigarette, "I'd be sleeping all summer, never mind driving across the country."

"You're what? Twenty-one? Not that much older," Quinn replied.

"Fuck do I feel it," he looked to his friends then and chuckled.

Even Quinn and Santana joined in, not totally sure why they were laughing but deciding feeling good after a shitty day or two was enough to have them giggling by firelight.

"So, Santana," Lily began, causing Quinn to eye her carefully, "you're going to be a?" She left the sentence open for Santana to fill.

"Lawyer. One day, hopefully," Santana's answer was surprisingly bashful and spurred Quinn to encourage her.

"Whatever you become you're going to be amazing," Quinn murmured against Santana's cheek as she pressed a kiss there.

The shy smile Santana gave her in return made her want to kiss her, but she didn't want to give the other three a show. So she settled for a soft touch to her leg – a soft touch that had Santana's gaze slipping into something as warm as the fire in front of them.

"Hyuck," Harry hiccupped, "I don't feel so hot, imma…" He began to stand but fell back into the camping chair he'd been sitting in.

"Woah," Evan commented, standing up to pull Harry back up. "Let's get you to bed."

"I'll give you a hand," Quinn offered, seeming how Harry had a few inches and pounds on Evan.

"Thanks, he's usually not such a lightweight, but driving takes it out of him."

Pushing Harry into the back of the van lay on his side with blanket tossed over him, and a bucket near his head, Evan gave Quinn a pat on the back that had her jerking forward and him apologising.

"Whoops," he chuckled.

Quinn gave him a funny look and he tapped the breast pocket on his jean jacket before wiggling his fingers into it to pull out a bag of weed.

"Want some?"

"No, I'm good."

Quinn almost laughed, she wondered if drugs would always be so easy to come by for her, then shook her head at the drunk thought.

"Suit yourself," he said as he made his way back to the girls.

Quinn's amusement soon dried up when she spotted Lily making herself comfortable with Santana, grazing her arm, patting her leg, touching her hair.

Santana seemed oblivious to it all, laughing along to whatever Lily was talking about, throwing small sticks into the fire.

How could she not see? Quinn fumed internally.

Her strides were quick and held purpose, but she didn't want to come off as crazy. No. She'd be subtle but nonetheless clear with this.

"Hey, S," she said before sliding herself between Lily and her girlfriend, near enough budging the other girl out of the way.

"Q, you just knocked Lily on her ass."

"What? No I," Quinn looked behind her to find Lily on the ground, "oh. Sorry."

Santana eyed her sceptically but Quinn only shrugged in response and played none the wiser. As for Lily, she got up and excused herself.

"What was that?" Santana prodded, shifting even closer to Quinn.

"What?"

"You're telling me you don't know what I'm talking about?"

"I honestly don't," Quinn took the small twig out of Santana's hand and tossed it into the fire.

Santana shook her head and laid her head on Quinn's shoulder, the smell of smoke having embedded itself into her clothes.

"You stink."

"You stink too."

"Good one," Santana drawled.

Quinn then stood and Santana went to protest the loss of her resting post, but a hand being held out towards her halted her words.

"Come with me?"

And she did. Quinn led her away from the fire and over to the car, holding the door open for Santana to climb in the back first. Inside, Santana struggled to get comfortable, a belt buckle stabbing into her back and pieces of their luggage strew across the backseat. She swiftly shoved them onto the floor and beckoned Quinn to follow, the door shutting with a solid click as the other girl settled next to her.

"I might ask my mom for a bigger car. Do you think I could guilt it out of her?"

Quinn laughed and kissed Santana then. Her smile only leaving her lips when Santana slid a hand down between them. The movement captured Quinn by surprise and served to stoke the fire inside of her while the one outside slowly died.

…

**Day Four**

"It's too bright, I have a migraine."

"Then close your eyes."

"Quinn, closing my eyes won't help. It's that bright."

"Here," Quinn slung her arm behind her to feel for a blanket, a jacket, an anything to shove in Santana's direction to shut her up for two seconds about the fact she had a headache. A headache that was self-inflicted Quinn might add. With one arm rooting through the back Quinn's driving took a decline and earned her a horn blasting at her before being very aggressively taken over.

"Quinn!" Santana yelped when the car swerved again. "Stop, I'll get it."

Quinn slammed her hand down on the horn and pumped her arm to wind the driver side window down. With a "Fuck you!" the car wobbled once more and Santana grabbed a hold of the steering wheel. "What a fucking asshole." Quinn fumed.

"Yeah, a real asshole," Santana cautioned as Quinn reclaimed control and took a deep breath. "I thought I'd be the one with the road rage."

"I do _not_ have road rage."

"Erm."

"Don't."

Santana weighed her options to best navigate her way around this, tensions were running high and being on the road was not as fun as she pictured it. Being with Quinn was great. The lack of running water, hot meals and a comfy bed not so much. She needed to come up with something that would let them decompress a little, but with the pressure between her eyes being a solid distraction to any productive thought, she put it on the back burner and covered her head with one of Quinn's sweatshirts.

The warmth from the sun, complete darkness and smell of Quinn was a sure way to have her melting into the car seat and slipping into a light doze.

…

**Day Five**

They'd made some serious tracks since the day before and despite yet another shitty sleep, were suddenly feeling quite excited that they were so close to being done with the drive. Only that excitement was severely shot when the car began sputtering along the highway.

"Did you put gas in on our last stop?"

"Yes. I am not stupid, Santana."

"Did I call you stupid?"

"You didn't have to."

The heat was getting to them. They hadn't had a good night sleep in days. Every little thing wore on their patience and fuck! They were so close. This could not be happening.

Santana pulled the car up on the hard shoulder and jumped out to look under the hood. She stood there for a solid fifteen minutes before Quinn begrudgingly joined her, arms crossed and face impassive.

"What's wrong with it?"

"I- I don't know. Maybe this?" Santana went to touch a steaming piece of metal but her hand was stopped by Quinn slapping it down.

"San, that's hot!" Quinn regarded Santana then with a steely gaze that had Santana shifting on the spot. "Do you even know anything about cars?"

"What do you think, Quinn?" Santana kicked a tire in a huff. Only when she heard laughter from behind her did Santana turn around and glare at her girlfriend. "What about this is funny?"

"I- I," Quinn can barely get a word out for laughing, tears already blurring her vision.

"What?" Santana's sour tone had suddenly softened as she watched Quinn fall apart in one of the best ways possible. The humour of the situation was becoming more apparent to her and she felt the workings of her own laughter humming in the hollow of her chest.

It was only when Quinn literally fell on the floor did Santana join her in boisterous laughter. Her own sides now aching and vision impaired by tears.

When a car pulled up behind theirs to ask them if they needed a hand, they only found themselves set off again, much to the friendly stranger's confusion. Eventually, they settled down some and could explain that the car was a "piece of shit" - Santana's words, not Quinn's. And after half an hour of tinkering away they were back on the road. Santana having given the kind woman, who they found out was called Jill, twenty-three bucks for the trouble. She would have given more if she'd thought to take any more cash out, but Jill had brushed off the offer a good five times before accepting so she didn't feel too awful for the amount.

"I love you," Quinn said to Santana as they headed into the suburb Santana's father lived.

Santana turned to her, heart full and fluttering, and replied, "I love you too." Quinn was still covered in dust and dirt from falling to the ground, her hair was a mess and she had the beginning of freckles along the bridge of her nose. Santana was so stupidly in love with her. There was nobody on Earth who she'd have preferred to take this trip with.

"Oh, San!" Quinn's excited shout took her by surprise. "We're here!"

"We're here?" You look to the house and yep, that's the same house her dad had sent her in a message a couple months back. "Oh shit. We're here. Fuck, Quinn. Fuck."

"San, don't be scared. I'm with you all the way, remember."

Santana took a calming breath and nodded for herself just as much as she nodded for Quinn.

They both climbed out of the car and braved the path leading up to a cosy house with a sea-blue door that Santana would have made comment on if she weren't so twisted up inside.

"Shall I?" Quinn offered and Santana nodded, too scared to speak for fear of being sick right on her dad's doorstep.

When Quinn knocked, Santana's grip on her girlfriend's hand had Quinn almost pitying Puck during the birth of Beth. Almost. But not quite.

And then, the door opened and Quinn held back a gasp. She'd seen photos of Santana's father, one's that he'd recently sent to Santana in preparation for her trip. But to see him up close. The resemblance was striking. The eyes were what rocked her the most. They were her Santana's eyes. The depth, the warmth, the softness.

"Santana," he had uttered before bursting into tears, tears that were soon shared by Santana as he took her in her arms.

Quinn watched as father hugged daughter at last and her heart had felt as though it would burst. Tears filled her own eyes at the sight.

Unadulterated happiness consumed her. To see Santana embraced and loved, it made the bitterness within her wither - though not completely. The pain she felt for her own broken relationship with her own father was still there, but it didn't hurt her as much as normally would have.

Nothing could ruin this moment.

They'd finally made it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hey, hey! Sorry this update took so long (for those on FF). Nevertheless, I hope you enjoyed and continue to do so. I don't know when I will next be updating, but please know that I do have the next few chapters outlined – it's just a matter of filling it all in. Slow and steady wins the race, right? Til next time, sexy people. Buh-bye!


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